Blood Ties
by Paisley Mae
Summary: We don't choose our family, but blood ties us together. Meredith and Derek are already struggling to balance their family and work lives when Derek's youngest sister, Amelia, arrives unannounced with a shocking request. [A McFamily fic]
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: A couple things about this story. 1) I wasn't going to post it at all until it was completely finished, and it's not finished yet. But I've written over 26,000 words. 2) There will be fluff. There will be drama. But most importantly, it will be very McFamily - centric, although other characters - past and present - will have prominent roles. 3) Lastly, this story contains spoilers from Private Practice.**

** This story is actually based off a dream I had. Without further ado, I hope you enjoy.**

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The Seattle rain pounded hard against the windows of Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital. Meredith Grey knew that she was in for another dark and stormy night at the house in the woods, all alone with her children while her husband was at the White House with Callie Torres attending a brain mapping conference hosted by the President of the United States. Today was day two of five.

Nights like tonight were the nights Meredith dreaded. The house felt so empty without his presence, and she struggled to sleep without his warm body lying next to her. He was her human furnace; without him, she felt like she was sleeping on top of a cushioned iceberg. She hated being so many miles away from Derek. With him on the other side of the country, all she did was worry. She already worried enough when he was in the same city as her. Her worrying was nearly unbearable now.

Meredith didn't want to be "that" wife, though: The wife who depended on her husband for everything and couldn't function without him. After all, Meredith Grey had always considered herself to be an independent woman. She'd spent a vast majority of her life believing love didn't exist and had thus developed a single woman train of thought. She didn't trust easily, and it had taken her a long time to trust Derek. It had taken her a long time to realize that she could rely on him, especially after how their relationship had begun: with a lie. Now, she had finally learned to trust him, to love him, to know that he wasn't going to leave her unintentionally. Being away from Derek for even a little while made her feel so empty inside. It was even more difficult now that they had children.

"Where's Daddy?" her three-year-old daughter asked, as Meredith helped her into her rain coat.

"Da - da!" her ten-month-old son cooed, sitting on the floor next to his sister, already bundled and ready to go.

"Daddy's still out of town. He'll be home Friday," Meredith explained to her kids. She looked into Zola's confused eyes; the kids weren't used to their mother picking them up from daycare. For the last several months, since Bailey's birth and Meredith's return from maternity leave, the kids had become accustomed to their daddy picking them up from daycare. Derek had stepped up so Meredith could focus on work, though Derek's plan was strained when Derek received an opportunity to work for the president.

"I want Daddy," Zola pouted as she stuck her lip out.

Meredith released a sigh, unable to deny how adorable her daughter was when she pouted. As she finished the last button of Zola's jacket, she gave her daughter an enormous hug. "Let's go home, and maybe Daddy will be waiting for us on the iPad."

"It not the same," the little girl whimpered, crossing her arms.

"I know, baby. I know you miss your daddy," Meredith gently rubbed Zola's back. She leaned over and picked up her son, then took Zola's hand and meandered toward the hospital entrance area.

"Meredith!" she heard a high - pitched voice calling her name from behind. She turned around to see Arizona Robbins running toward her with Sofia in her arms.

She set Sofia on the ground, and the little girl ran toward them, wrapping her arms around Zola. She chimed, "Buddy!" Sofia and Zola were close and had grown closer after Callie had temporarily moved in with Meredith and Derek after finding out Arizona had cheated on her. The girls had grown used to spending their days and nights together. Zola loved having someone her own age to play with. It had been really hard on Zola when Callie and Sofia moved out. In fact, she'd asked every day for the next two weeks if Sofia was coming soon.

Arizona and Callie were now back together and trying to make their relationship work again. Meredith didn't know Arizona as well as she'd grown to know Callie. It was funny, when she looked back. She would never forget the time that Callie had marched around her house naked, and the time Callie had peed in her bathroom right in front of her and Izzie. There had been a time she'd thought Callie was a freak. Times really had changed, and Callie was now one of her closest friends. She and Cristina weren't as close as they'd once been, and now it seemed like she had more in common with Callie than her best friend - even though they'd drifted apart, Meredith would always consider Cristina her _best friend__,_ even if Callie was her closest female friend now. The tables had turned.

Tonight, Arizona and Meredith had something in common. Their spouses were in Washington D.C. together, and they were home alone with the children.

"Hey, so I was thinking, since Callie and Derek are away, and I'm sure you don't want to be alone in the woods by yourself - well, at least I wouldn't - I was wondering, if you would want to - uh, you know - spend the night at my place?" Arizona smiled hopefully.

"Sleepover!" Sofia exclaimed and turned to Zola, whose eyes were widening.

"Mommy, pwease!" Zola tugged at Meredith's shirt. Meredith looked into her daughter's glistening dark brown eyes. Callie and Arizona's apartment was so small, and she didn't like the idea of putting the baby to sleep somewhere other than his bedroom. He wasn't used to it. Plus, she really just wasn't in the mood for sleepovers with Arizona Robbins. She liked Arizona, but she wasn't the type of person that Meredith would typically choose to spend time with on her own free will. Of course, she once that that about Callie, and now they were pretty close friends. Arizona was different, though. Arizona was - perky, and quite frankly, though Meredith had never told anyone, she found it annoying at times. Hence why she didn't want to spend the night with her.

Meredith hesitated as she said, "I'm exhausted, and I really just want to hit the sack." She saw Zola's smile bend into a frown. "However, if Miss Zola would like to have a sleepover with Sofia, I don't see why not." She patted her three-year-old's head and gave her a warm smile as the child's face lit up.

"Yay!" Zola and Sofia both cheered.

"Sofi can talk to Daddy too," Zola said with an excited smile on her face, and Meredith's lips drooped.

"Baby girl, Daddy is going to be talking to Mommy, and he can only talk to one person at a time," Meredith told her daughter and watched as her daughter's smile faded.

"Oh, not if you use Skype!" Arizona's face lit up. "Callie and I use Skype, and you can have group chats on Skype."

Meredith laughed. "I had a Hell of a time teaching Derek how to use FaceTime. There's no way he's going to be able to figure out how to use Skype as well. My husband is technologically challenged," she told Arizona.

"Well, Callie's there, she can help him figure it out. Or, better yet, what if Callie is on her iPad Skyping Sofia, Zola, and I, and you're on FaceTime with Derek? That way we can all talk to them at the same time, and Derek won't have to strain his brain with new technology," Arizona grinned widely.

"Pwease, Mommy!" Zola tugged at her mom's hand.

Meredith released a sigh and nodded. "I guess I can't say no, can I?" She handed Arizona the diaper bag in her hand. "There's a spare outfit in there, and Zola's extra toothbrush is in there as well. Make sure she brushes her teeth before bed and in the morning. Oh, there are some things of Bailey's in there as well, but he won't need them tonight." She patted rubbed her son's back.

"Relax, Meredith. Zola is in good hands," Arizona said, patting Zola's head. "Of course, you're more than welcome to come over."

Meredith looked at her son. "I trust you," she said. Arizona shrugged and took both girls' hands.

"Bye-bye, Mommy," Zola waved. Meredith watched as her daughter left with Arizona and Sofia. Her throat ached as she fought back a tear. Her little girl had been so willing to say goodbye to her, and she hadn't even given her a kiss. She was only three years old. She was supposed to not want to leave her mama's side, but Zola had not even hesitated. Meredith swallowed. She wasn't supposed to be experiencing this feeling of separation from her three-year-old daughter. This wasn't the first night she'd spent apart from her daughter. She'd been away from Zola when she'd taken her oral boards. Both had been sick with the flu, then. She'd been away from Zola after the plane crash, and then after she had Bailey. There'd been numerous occasions she'd been away from Zola when she had stayed at the hospital with her patients.

Maybe Zola thought she didn't care about her. After all, she had been so willing to leave her. Meredith fought the tears as she looked into her little boy's bright blue eyes. "Come on, baby. Let's get you home." She gave her son a kiss on the forehead and headed to the car.

She placed Bailey in his car seat and then glanced at the empty booster seat next to his. The car felt so empty with just one kid in the backseat. She handed him his teething ring before she started driving. He'd started teething about two months ago and had been extremely fussy, especially in the car.

Zola always fell asleep in the car, but Bailey was a completely different child. She imagined it was because he was so used to being held. He'd been spoiled during the first seven months of his life, because his daddy had been home with him all the time and Derek never put him down. She'd read in childcare books that tummy time was good for kids, and she'd tried to explain that to Derek; but he was still insistent on holding his son.

Bailey sucked on his teething ring as she drove and babbled on and off. She'd noticed he'd started babbling more in the last few weeks. He said "Ma - ma", "Da - da", "Ba - ba", and "Zo - Zo." He was a smart little guy, and Meredith was proud of him. He'd also started walking while holding onto the furniture the day before Derek had left for Washington D.C. Derek tried to make her promise that she wouldn't let him take his first steps on his own without him, but she didn't know how she was supposed to keep that kind of promise.

"Don't let him out of your arms!" Derek had insisted, and the two had shared a laugh. Meredith told him that she couldn't make any promises.

She pulled up to the dark house in the woods. Meredith hated the dark. It reminded her of after the plane crash. Fortunately, Derek had been kind enough to install motion lights around the property.

Chills swept down her spine as she opened the door. There was an eerie feeling that bothered her as she opened the back seat and unbuckled her son from his car seat. She noticed the motion light by the front door was on. She swallowed and set her son back into his seat. She made sure she had her car keys in her hands, and she closed and locked the door. There was no way she had triggered the front door's light yet. She knew she was out of motion. Someone - or something - was out there.

Maybe it's just the wind, she thought, knowing sometimes the wind go pick up strong enough to set off the lights. However, it wasn't a windy day. It was a calm, dry day in Seattle. "Hello?" she called out, waiting for a response. Then, she remembered that Alex had said that he'd seen a bear when he was living in Derek's trailer. In the near - two years she'd lived out here, she had yet to see one. She'd always suspected Alex had made it up.

She heard movement in the distance. There was a dark shadow coming toward her. "Who's there?" she said loudly, and she heard the bellows coming from her son in the car. Her heart pounded recklessly in her chest. The shadow was coming toward her. It wasn't long before she realized it was a human - shaped shadow.

"Meredith?" a familiar voice spoke.

The slender, dark-haired woman appeared under the light.

"Amelia?"

She immediately recognized her husband's youngest sister, whom she had met only twice. The first time was about four years ago, after hospital shooting that had nearly killed her husband. Derek and Amelia were estranged at the time, for reasons Meredith hadn't known about until Amelia had surprisingly arrived at the hospital with a man she'd met on the plane who happened to have an inoperable tumor. Meredith remembered how upset Derek had been, and how Meredith had insisted he buy her a cup of coffee because she was his sister. Derek's response? "I have a lot of sisters and if I bought them all coffee, we wouldn't have anything."

Later, Meredith learned the real reason behind Derek's reaction to his sister's presence. Amelia had crashed his car while being high on painkillers. She had also stolen his prescription pads to write himself prescriptions and had overdosed. He'd gone home to find her dead. She'd been dead for three minutes for three minutes before Derek saved her.

Meredith had met Amelia a second time when she'd brought a friend to Seattle to ask for Derek's help. This had been shortly after she and Derek had adopted Zola. Derek had confided to Meredith that Amelia had just gotten out of rehab again, and he was hesitant about allowing her to meet Zola. She had spent a couple nights on Meredith's couch at her old house, where April, Jackson, and Lexie had also lived at the time.

Meredith took in a deep breath while observing the Shepherd sister in front of her, while wondering what warranted this visit.

"What are you doing here, Amelia? Derek is in D.C.," Meredith informed her, unlocking her car door now that she knew there wasn't a bear that was about to attack her, or a mass murderer.

"Yeah, I know, that's why I'm here now. I saw he posted a picture on Instagram of the White House. There he is again, being the golden child again. No surprise there," Amelia said as Meredith reached into the car and unstrapped her son. Bailey cooed as she took him out of his car seat. "Is that my baby nephew? His name's Derek, Jr., right?"

"Derek Bailey Shepherd," Meredith said. "We call him Bailey, though. Really, Amelia, what are you doing here, then? I barely know you, so I don't know why you would come to Seattle just to see me. Doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me."

"Hey, little guy," Amelia waved at the baby, who watched her closely as Meredith walked toward the house. Amelia followed closely after her. "I'm your Auntie Amelia, your daddy's sister."

"Da - da," the baby cooed as Meredith unlocked the door and walked inside, Amelia followed.

"You're right. I don't know you well," Amelia said. "And that's partly why I'm here. I want to get to know you better. I mean, Addison and I have always been close, and I'll admit I was a little devastated with how she and Derek ended. Addie was my best friend, and still to this day I'm closer to her than I am my own three sisters."

Meredith took off her shoes and Bailey's and set them by the front door. The lights on the inside of the house were also motioned censored, so they turned on when you walked into a room. Though, she could turn them off by clapping twice. It was another perk Derek had added to the house which she really appreciated.

"So, you want to get to know me better?" Meredith asked slowly as she walked over to the couch and sat down with Bailey still in her arms. Amelia was following her as she walked. She stood next to the couch. "Well, take a seat." She motioned for Amelia to sit down.

Amelia sat down in a chair and nodded. "Well, yeah. You know, I really know nothing about you, and for the longest time I just knew you as the "slutty intern" who messed up my brother's and best friend's relationship, but obviously you're not the slutty intern anymore, and you're the mother of my niece and nephew and…" Amelia looked around curiously. "Where is my beautiful niece?"

"Oh, Zola is spending the night with a friend," Meredith explained. "And that's all very interesting, but why now? Why now of all times do you want to get to know me better? Derek and I have been together for a while now."

Amelia looked away, and she could see the paleness in the young woman's face.

"Look, I know Derek really loves you, from what Addison has told me about you, and my mom adores you. She never liked Addie; thought she was all wrong for Derek, and maybe she was right. I don't know all what Derek has told you about me, because I know I've made my share of mistakes…"

"He hasn't told me much," Meredith confessed, still holding onto a squirming baby, whose eyes were fixated on his aunt.

"Yeah, well, I'm sure you know about my drug problem; Derek never lets me forget it. Well, I'm clean now. I've been clean for nearly two years now, and I'm in a healthy relationship. I really have my life on track."

"That's great, Amelia," Meredith said, noting the sudden heavy warmness coming from Bailey's bottom. "Somebody needs a diaper change," she cooed at her little boy and stood up and walked toward Bailey's nursery. She passed Zola's empty room and sighed, realizing how empty the house felt without her daughter. Amelia had followed after her.

"And you know I'm a neurosurgeon like Derek, and I really love my job," she said. "And I think I'm damn good at it, of course I'm nowhere near as good as Derek. I never will be, because he'll always be the golden child."

"Sounds like you're a little jealous of him," Meredith noted as she laid her son on the diaper changing station. She unzipped his pants and the fumes of poo lingered through her nose. "Somebody's stinky," she said in a baby voice to her son as she wiped him down. He giggled as she changed his diaper. She saw Amelia watching her in the corner of her eye and was still overly confused as to why Amelia was even there, telling her all this. It's not that Meredith wasn't interested in getting to know Amelia better.

In fact, Meredith often wondered about Derek's sisters, though she'd never made an effort to get to know them. About three months ago, she and Derek had taken Zola and baby Bailey to the east coast for Christmas. It was Bailey's first plane ride and the first time she had attended a Shepherd family Christmas. Amelia was the only one of Derek's sisters who wasn't there. She'd supposedly spent the holidays with her boyfriend's family. Meredith had spent some time getting to know Kathleen, Elizabeth, and Nancy. Nancy still to this day made Meredith feel uncomfortable, considering she'd never forget her first encounter with Nancy in Derek's trailer. Derek had been naked, and there Nancy had been. She hadn't known at the time Nancy was his sister.

Kate had quickly become Meredith's favorite Shepherd sister. She was the shrink in the family, and out of everyone, her kids seemed the sanest. They were polite and had good manners. All five of Liz's kids were insanely wound up on sugar during the whole visit. Liz's youngest, eight-year-old Lily, had asked Zola if it felt weird to be black in a white family. Who in their right mind asks a three-year-old such a question? Lily and her siblings had treated Zola like some sort of shrine because of her dark skin. Meredith had been royally pissed, and the last thing she wanted was for her daughter to be treated differently by her own relatives because of her skin color. Meredith was adamant about having her daughter fit in and treated just like everyone else.

That was one thing Meredith loved about working at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital in Seattle. Diversity was everywhere, and everyone was treated equally. Unfortunately, that mindset wasn't everywhere.

"You're right," Amelia sighed. "I am jealous of him. Bailey has Derek's eyes, though the rest of him is definitely you."

"I hear that a lot," Meredith said, deciding since it was so late she might as well change Bailey into his pajamas. She pulled out a pair of green Ninja Turtle pajamas and dressed her son. "I just hope he gets his Daddy's hair." She patted her son's head, noting the thin dark blond strands of hair on her son's head. His hair was very close to her color, but she knew his hair color could change as he grew older.

"Derek had blond hair when he was a baby," Amelia said with a smile on her face. "Ma has a ton of baby pictures of him with Nancy, Kate, and Liz."

"Really? I've never seen them," Meredith said, wishing she'd asked Mama Shepherd about Derek's baby pictures over the holidays. "I guess the next time I talk to her, I'm going to have to ask her about those."

Amelia laughed. "Then Derek will get all embarrassed and his cheeks will flush red. I don't know why he's so embarrassed by his baby pictures. He really is cute. All babies are cute, though, I guess," Amelia said with a smile on her face, then looked at her nephew. "But they're not all as cute as you." She grinned and gently touched Bailey's cheek. Bailey cooed. Amelia looked at Meredith and said, "You know, you're really good with him. Bailey's lucky to have such a great mom."

"Um, thanks?" Meredith responded hesitantly. She scooped Bailey into her arms and went back into the living room, again followed by Amelia. "Amelia, I really wish you'd tell me the real reason you're here. I know you don't know me well, but I'm a lot of things, and gullible isn't one of them." She sat back on the couch.

"You know, I love kids," Amelia said.

"There you go, changing the subject again," Meredith observed. She cuddled Bailey in her arms. "Come on, Amelia, tell me the truth now."

"I'm great with kids," Amelia said, and Meredith noticed the tears forming in the young woman's face. "I have a great boyfriend who wants kids, and sometimes I think I want kids too, but I can't forget him."

"You can't forget who?" Meredith asked, now entirely confused.

"My son," Amelia whispered.

"Wait, what?"

"Derek never knew. I never told any of my siblings, but the last time I was here, I was pregnant. I didn't know it then. By the time I found out, I was already twenty weeks. I'd gotten pregnant while I was high by my…" tears were now streaming down Amelia's throat as she choked out, "my late boyfriend. He died while he was high…" Amelia swallowed, tears streamed from her face. Meredith shifted Bailey to one arm and motioned for Amelia to sit next to her. Amelia sat next to Meredith, who wrapped her free arm around Amelia. Amelia continued, "It was gonna be the last time, I swear. We were just gonna finish the drugs so they didn't go to use, but I woke up...and he was dead. And later I found I was pregnant...with a baby with Anencephaly."

Meredith frowned. She knew the term, though she had never seen it in person, despite all the time during her residency that she had spent with Derek in neuro. She knew that Amelia meant that her baby was born without a brain.

"Oh, my God, Amelia. I had no idea," Meredith whispered. "I'm so sorry."

"Nobody knew. I made Addie promise not to tell my family. Then, Meredith, after the baby was born, I - I held him for a few minutes, until they took him away, s - so I could donate his organs to babies who had a chance to live," Amelia said, and tears welled from her eyes.

"I can't imagine how difficult that was for you, Amelia," Meredith whispered, rubbing Amelia's back as she poured tears into Meredith's shoulder. "But why are you telling me this? I barely know you, and I mean, I'm flattered that you're trusting me with these intimate details of your life, but I have to ask...why me?"

"Because I'm pregnant again," Amelia gasped.

"That's great, Amelia, but Addison is the baby doctor, not me. Apparently Derek didn't tell you; I'm a general surgeon."

"I know, Meredith. I - I want you and Derek to adopt my baby."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N - Thank you for the reviews, favorites, and follows! I'm really excited about this story, which is why I couldn't hold it in much longer. This chapter contains my all-time favorite McFamily scene that I've written so far, so I really hope you all like it. There's also some Calzona fluff. :)**

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The bombshell that Amelia had just dropped caused Meredith's head to spin to the point Bailey almost slipped out of her arms. Luckily, she'd been able to catch him before he fell. Her eyes widened and she released a loud gasp.

"W-What?" Meredith stuttered, trying to make sense of what Amelia had just said.

Amelia stood up and took off her jacket. She lifted her baggy shirt, and her belly bump was clear as day. "I knew Derek would push me away, so I thought t6hat if I could convince you, then you could convince Derek. I haven't forgotten about how you tried to talk Derek into talking to me the first time I came to Seattle. Derek loves and respects you. He might love me, but she sure as hell doesn't respect me. Though, I don't blame him."

"I'm sorry, I'm not following," Meredith said, holding her own baby close to her body. "You said you're in a happy relationship, so what's the problem? And like you've already said, you barely know me, so why would you want _me _to mother your child? Amelia, how old are you? Thirty-four? Thirty-five? You only have about _maybe_, if you're lucky, ten good years left to have kids, Amelia."

"I can't raise this baby," Amelia whispered. "When I found out, I freaked. I mean, James is great, which is why he can't ever know I was pregnant. And I'm amazing with kids. I babysit Addison's son, Henry, and my friend Charlotte's triplets all the time. But that's just it. I'm a great aunt. A great babysitter. I would not be a good mother, and I keep wondering...what if something is wrong with this baby too? What if he or she doesn't have a brain?"

"Amelia, slow down. Have you had an ultrasound?" Meredith asked.

"I just found out about a week ago. I'd gained some weight, but I thought I'd just been eating too much, and my periods have always been irregular so I didn't think anything of it. Addison doesn't know, and she can't know. She'll tell James and then he won't understand. I told him I wanted kids, but now I've changed my mind."

"Why Derek and me?" Meredith had to ask, stroking her baby's back. "You have three sisters. Why Derek and me?"

"Oh, come on, Nancy's youngest kid is in high school, plus she has three in college, one in residency, and plus a grandbaby on the way. I really doubt she wants to take on a baby now, especially now that she's about to be a grandmother. Liz has five kids of her own ranging from eight to fourteen. I don't know if you've met them, but they're a handful. And Kate's a great mother, but she has four kids of her own and her husband is the Police Commissioner. She's basically raised those kids on her own, which in reality is beneficial for the kids because her husband is a total douche."

"And Derek and I don't have our hands full?" Meredith said, looking down at her baby. "We're both surgeons, and we have a baby and a preschooler, and now Derek's consulting long-distance for the president and has to make occasional visits to D.C. We're losing our minds as it is. We can't take on another kid, Amelia."

Meredith saw the disappointment override Amelia's face, and before she could respond, Meredith's phone started to ring. She looked at the caller identification. "It's Derek," she told Amelia.

Amelia's eyes widened. "Please, don't tell him I'm here," she whispered.

Meredith sighed and answered the phone. "Hi, Derek."

"How's my beautiful wife today?" Derek's loving voice entered her ear.

"Well, she's missing her handsome husband," Meredith sighed, noticing as Amelia rolled her eyes. "How was your day?"

"My day was amazing, but it would have been better if you were here. Guess what? The president himself invited me to meet with him in the Oval Office. It was an extraordinary experience," Derek told her.

"I bet it was. You have no idea how jealous I am of you," she said.

"Daddy!" she heard a voice that sounded like her daughter's in the background.

"Is that ZoZo?" Meredith asked.

"Yeah, Callie is here and has her video thing going on her iPad. You didn't tell me that Zo was spending the night with Sofia and Arizona," Derek said, and the pitch in his voice changed as he said, "Hi, ZoZo! I'm on the phone with your mommy."

"Hey, let me go grab my iPad and you can FaceTime with Bailey and me too," Meredith said, standing up. She looked down at her baby boy and cooed, "Are you ready to see Da-Da?" The little boy's face lit up.

"Da-Da!" the little boy grinned.

"Is that Bailey's voice I hear?" Derek asked.

"Uh-huh," she nodded as she booted up her iPad. She looked over at Amelia, who suddenly disappeared into Bailey's nursery. She launched the FaceTime app and called Derek. "I'm calling you," she told Derek.

"Okay, let me see if I can answer…" A moment later, Derek's face appeared on her screen.

"Hi!" he waved at them, and Meredith ended the call on her phone and set it down. She took a seat on the floor and set Bailey between her legs so he could see his daddy.

"Da-Da!" Bailey giggled.

"Hi, Bailey," Derek cooed at his son. "Have you grown?" The pitch in his voice changed as he spoke to his wife, "Has he grown, Meredith? It's only been two days, but he looks bigger."

She looked down at her son, who seemed the same size to her as he had two days ago, but she shrugged. "Maybe he has."

Derek sighed. "I'm missing everything. I can't wait to get home already."

"Daddy, have I gwown?" she heard Zola's sweet voice. She still struggled to pronounce her R's. Zola seemed so close, yet she was across town, and her voice was being transferred through all the way to Washington D.C. and back to her iPad in Seattle. The wonders of technically were truly magical.

"I think so!" Derek gasped. "In fact, I think you're bigger now than you were when you first came on the screen!"

"I want to see ZoZo," Meredith declared. "Show me ZoZo."

"She's right here," Meredith heard Callie's voice off camera, though she soon saw a hand-presumably Callie's-holding an iPad. She saw Arizona, Zola, and Sofia.

"Oh, look, Zo, there's your mommy and your brother," Arizona said.

"Hi, Mama!" Zola giggled. "Hi, Bailey! This is fun!"

"ZoZo!" Bailey cooed and put his hand on the screen. "ZoZo DaDa!"

"That's right, Bailey, we're talking to Zola and Daddy on the iPad," Meredith said softly to her son. He giggled and babbled some words in his own baby language. "Auntie Callie is there, too," Meredith told Bailey, then she changed her tone as she spoke directly to Callie, "Callie, show Bailey you're here."

Callie's iPad was now pulled out of Meredith's line of sight, so she couldn't see Zola, Arizona, and Sofia anymore. Callie appeared right next to Derek. "Hi, Bailey!" Callie's vibrant face appeared on the screen, and she waved at Meredith and Bailey. "I think your daddy's right. You are getting BIG!" Callie turned to Derek and said, "He is growing!"

"Let me see him again!" Meredith heard Arizona's voice, and Zola, Sofia, and Arizona were again in view of the camera. "I think you're right! He is growing!" Arizona smiled. The screen moved again, and Callie reappeared on the screen.

"Coo-Coo," Bailey cooed.

"Did he just say we're cuckoo?" Callie laughed.

"Actually, I think he was trying to say _Callie_," Derek pitched in.

"Oh, so in other words, I'm cuckoo," Callie said, and Derek and Meredith both busted into laughter.

"Cuckoo Callie, suits you well, sweetheart," Arizona laughed.

"Hey, now!" Callie blushed.

"I wouldn't take it too personal, Callie. He's ten months old," Meredith reminded her, and they all laughed.

"What does _coo-coo_ mean, 'Zona?" Meredith heard Zola's voice off camera.

"It means crazy," Arizona explained to the preschooler.

"Mommy is coo-coo," Meredith heard Sofia's voice for the first time since the video call had begun. Sofia was generally quieter than Zola. She was very shy around strangers as well. Even when Meredith baby-sat her, it usually took her a couple hours for Sofia to warm up to her. Though, when she left the girls to play, she always heard Sofia chattering with Zola.

"I think _Bailey _has taught our daughters a new vocabulary word," Derek laughed. "We've got a smart little guy on our hands, Mer." He was gazing into her eyes, and she gazed back. There was something about the way that he looked at her that still gave her butterflies even now after being married for almost-technically, counting the post-it-five years. It was the _sparkly eye _thing that he did. She couldn't help but desire him.

"We do," she whispered and looked down at her son, whose eyes twinkled, "and he's got his father's sparkly eyes."

"Do I need to leave you two alone?" Callie teased. "I mean, I'd tell you to get a room, but considering we're on the other side of the country right now."

Meredith laughed, rolling her eyes. "I have a baby in my arms, Callie," she said teasingly.

"Oh, Callie has no room to talk. I'll never forget the time she called me when I was in the hospital and told me…"

"Hey! Hey! Stop right there, Mr. Neuro God. There are little ears in the room," Callie broke in before Derek could finish.

Meredith knew exactly where Derek was going. He'd told her about the time Callie had called him after his hand surgery to tell him she was in a hotel room with Arizona at Miranda Bailey's wedding, and was about to have sex for the first time in a long time.

"Wait, you and Callie aren't sharing a hotel room, are you, Derek?" Meredith asked curiously.

"Why?" Callie asked. "Are you worried that I'm going to do naughty things to your husband." She put her hands on Derek's chest and laughed. "Ooooh, Derek," she moaned. Meredith noticed the surprised look on Derek's face.

"Hey! Stop! Little ears and eyes in the room!" she heard Arizona call, and Callie's iPad became visible again as Meredith saw Arizona trying to cover Sofia's and Zola's eyes and ears.

"And get your paws off my man!" Meredith snapped jokingly-for the most part. She couldn't help but be a little jealous that Callie was touching Derek and she wasn't. Callie took her hands off Derek.

"Oh, right. Sorry," Callie laughed. "Anyway, I'm kidding. Derek and I have our own rooms, besides I would never disrespect Mark's honor like that."

"Uh-hem," Meredith heard Arizona cough.

"And I'm married," Callie proudly showed her wedding ring, and added, "to the most beautiful woman in the world."

"Awww," Arizona cooed. "I love you, Calliope."

"I love you, too, Arizona," Callie said as she went out of Meredith's view and took her iPad with her, so Meredith couldn't see Zola, Sofia, and Arizona.

"Who needs the room now?" Meredith snickered looking at her husband, who chuckled. At the same time, Bailey started to fuss. "Are you sleepy, baby?" She looked at the time on the top of her iPad. It was approaching ten-thirty. It was definitely Bailey's bed time. "I think someone's a sleepy boy," she cooed, and looked at Derek. "I think we're going to have to say goodnight."

"Aw, it was nice to see you. I'm glad you taught me how to use this FaceTime thing. Zola is right, it's fun. I hope we get to talk again before I come home. I love you, Mer, and I love you, too, Bailey."

Bailey stopped crying when his father talked to him.

"Maybe you could sing him to sleep," Meredith suggested. "I had a hell of a time putting him down last night. He's so used to you putting him to sleep."

"I never have a hard time getting him to sleep," Derek laughed.

"Yeah, thanks for rubbing it in my face," sighed Meredith.

"Hey, I'm going to get the girls to sleep," Meredith heard Arizona's voice. "Show me Meredith, Callie, so Zola can say goodnight to her mom."

Callie's iPad appeared on the screen one last night. "Night night, Mama," Zola was waving. "Night night, Daddy. Night night, Bailey."

"Goodnight, my sweet ZoZo," Meredith blew Zola a kiss, who blew a kiss back.

"I wove you," Zola said.

"I love you, too, honey," Meredith smiled warmly at the little girl, and those words made Meredith feel a little better about her baby girl spending the night at a friend's house. _She still loves her mother, _Meredith thought, and her heart felt warm. Callie pulled the iPad away, and Zola was out of sight. Bailey started to cry again.

"It's okay, Bails, Daddy's going to sing you to sleep," Derek said, and their son stopped crying the moment his father spoke. Derek continued to talk to Bailey, which seemed to calm him. Meredith stood up and carried Bailey to his room, with Derek still on the call. In the nursery, Meredith found Amelia holding one of Bailey's stuffed bears. It was the one Derek's mom had given to him for Christmas. She'd said it was Derek's when he was a baby. Meredith suspected that Amelia recognized it.

Amelia's eyes widened when she saw the iPad and heard her brother's voice talking to his son. Meredith turned the iPad away from Amelia and gave her a clean get-a-way from the room, so Derek wouldn't see her.

"Mer?" Derek began just as Amelia was leaving the room. "What are you looking at? Point me."

"It's nothing, Derek," she lied. "I'm just going to put Bailey in his crib, and you can sing to him goodnight." She set the iPad on the nightstand for a second as she lay her son in his bed. He started to bawl. She put the crib bar up and quickly grabbed the iPad. "Daddy's here, sweetie."

"I'm right here, Bailey," Derek said soothingly, and Bailey stopped fussing. "The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the waterspout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out." As Derek sang, Bailey's eyes drooped shut. Derek continued, "Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. And the itsy bitsy spider went out the spout again. I love you, Bailey." Bailey's eyes were closed, and when Derek stopped singing, he didn't cry.

"Shhh," Meredith whispered. "I think he's asleep."

She turned the light off and tiptoed out of the room. Her son didn't cry when she left, so she assumed he was asleep.

"See, that was fast," Derek laughed.

"You always have calmed him," Meredith noted. "Even when he was in my belly. When you talked to him, he stopped kicking. He hates my voice."

"He doesn't hate your voice. He's just a Daddy's boy," Derek insisted. "Zola is such a Mommy's girl. By the way, Callie left. I think she and Arizona are having a video sex date after the kids are asleep."

"Derek!" Meredith scolded, and she saw Amelia lying on the couch when she entered the living room. "My daughter is at Arizona's. I don't want to think about that…" She saw Amelia's eyes widened; she was obviously listening to the conversation.

"Well, I was just telling you that Callie was gone in case you wanted to, you know, talk dirty," Derek teased, and he took off his shirt. Her eyes fixated on his abs. She knew Derek wouldn't be talking like this if he knew his baby sister was in the room with her. He would also be humiliated if he knew that she'd heard everything she'd just said. "We could have our own video sex date," he said seductively. "You could take off your clothes, and I could take off mine, and we could…"

Amelia's mouth dropped, and she mouthed a word that looked like "Seriously?"

He took off his pants and her eyes focused on his bulge. Her heart was racing, and she was really wishing Amelia wasn't here right now.

"Derek, stop!" Meredith shrieked.

"What, you're not turned on by me anymore?" Derek asked, frowning.

"Trust me, Derek, that's not it. It's just...this feels weird. It's just not my thing. I love you, this...uh...isn't going to happen. And I'm tired, I think I'm just going to hit the sack, you know? You should too. You have a big day tomorrow as well, Mr. Neuro God who had a personal meeting with the President of the United States in the Oval Office." Meredith caught herself glancing at Amelia.

Derek stuck his lip out. "If you say so," he pouted.

"Oh, poor baby," Meredith laughed.

"You better be ready to have lots of sex when I get back," Derek teased. "I don't know how people do long-distance relationships. I'm going crazy."

Meredith blushed. This wasn't the kind of conversation she wanted Derek's youngest sister to overhear.

"Why are you blushing, Mer? Usually you're the one who's talking dirty, so why so bashful? Wait, is someone there? You're not alone, are you?" Derek's eyes widened. "Who's there?"

Meredith swallowed, catching a glimpse of Amelia, who shook her head quickly and mouthed the word, "Please."

"Nobody is here," Meredith smiled softly. "I'm just really tired, so I'm going to go to bed. I love you, Derek."

"Okay… I love you, too, Meredith," Derek said. "I'll call you in the morning, okay? Goodnight." He was waving when she ended the call.

Meredith looked at Amelia, who was breathing in deeply. "Sorry about that," Meredith apologized sincerely. "I'm sure that was awkward for you, but in his defense, he didn't know you were here."

"I know," Amelia said. "But, yeah, definitely a little awkward. I mean...not surprising, considering how much I love to talk dirty myself, but he's my big brother. I never thought he was...so forward. Definitely gives me a different image in my head of my big brother."

Meredith laughed. "You're just lucky I cut him off when I did."

"Thanks for that," Amelia said. "So, uh, you're not going to make me get a hotel room or something, are you? Because I'm not going anywhere. I told Addie that Derek needed my help with his presidential project for the next few months."

"You're planning on staying here until the baby is born, aren't you?" Meredith asked. Amelia nodded. "Well, then you're going to need to get an ultrasound first thing in the morning, and I'm assuming you're not taking prenatal vitamins." Amelia shook her head. Meredith went into the bathroom, because she believed she still had some left over from when she was pregnant with Bailey. She opened the cabinet and saw the bottle. She grabbed it and brought it out to Amelia. "You can start here."

"Thanks," Amelia said with a weak smile. "But what if there's already something critical wrong with the baby, and it's too late?"

"Look, I'm no gynecologist, but I know that the sooner you start taking prenatal vitamins, the better your chances are of having a healthy baby," offered Meredith, giving Amelia the vitamins. Amelia let out a sigh and took a vitamin. So, do you want to tell me why you were cuddling with that bear in there?"

Amelia froze and swallowed. "It used to be Derek's," she said.

"I know," Meredith said.

"I'm guessing my mom gave it to you."

"You would be guessing correct. She gave it to Bailey when we were at her place for Christmas."

"I'm really surprised she gave it to you," Amelia said. "I guess Mom must really like you, because Liz wanted it when her oldest son was born, but Mom wouldn't let her have it. I take it she didn't tell you the story behind it?" Amelia noticed the confused look on her face. Amelia sighed, "I'm surprised. Well, Derek was born in the middle of January...of course, I wasn't born yet, so I only know this story because Kate told it to me. But it was freezing out, and Mom was home alone while Dad was at the shop when she went into labor. The snow was so bad that school had been cancelled, so my sisters were home with her. Nancy's the oldest; she's fourteen years older than Derek, Kate was eight, and Liz was only three.

The power had gone out, so the phones weren't working when Mom went into labor. Nancy, not having her license yet, managed to drive Mom to the hospital, despite the heavy winds and large snow drifts, and she made it there safely. Nancy stayed with Mom the whole time during the delivery; that's when she decided she wanted to be an O.B.

Dad didn't find out until after Derek was born that he had a son, so he rushed to the hospital. He felt really bad for missing his son's birth and wanted to make up for it, but he didn't have time to stop anywhere, so he took that bear from his store. Derek slept with it every night until he went to high school." Amelia sniffled as she finished the story. Her eyes were red, and Meredith could tell she was holding back tears.

"Wow," Meredith stared wide-eyed at Amelia. "Why didn't Derek tell me this story?"

"Derek doesn't like to talk about our dad," Amelia said. "It brings back too many painful memories for him." In all the years Meredith had known Derek, he'd only mentioned his father a handful of times. She imagined it had to be hard for him to talk about. He'd watched his father die right in front of his eyes. So, of course it was difficult to talk about. Meredith could relate, because it was hard for her to talk about her mother. And it was even more difficult to talk about what happened to Lexie.

Meredith remembered the surprised look on Derek's face when they'd opened the neatly wrapped gift. She remembered Derek whispering something to his mother, but she hadn't heard what he'd said. Now, everything made sense.

"So, anyway, you're not kicking me out, right?" Amelia asked.

"The couch is yours," Meredith assured Amelia. At least she wasn't going to be in the house all alone with her baby.


	3. Chapter 3

Meredith had lain awake in her cold, empty bed for most of the night. She remembered watching the clock turn to twelve then one and then two. She found herself thinking about what Amelia had said. Amelia couldn't really be serious, could she? She really wanted Derek and her to adopt her unborn child? Amelia had seemed pretty serious, but none of it really made logical sense to Meredith.

She remembered when Addison called Derek to tell him that Amelia was using again. Derek was infuriated and threatened to come down to L.A. to knock some sense to his little sister, but Addie told him not to do that, because it would make the situation worse. Derek told Meredith that Amelia was prone to eccentric behavior. He said that he'd suspected she was bipolar, though she had never been formally diagnosed.

That was about all Meredith knew about Amelia before she'd shown up at her house unexpectedly. Meredith wondered how Amelia even found the house. Meredith added that to the list of questions she had for Amelia. Liz was the only Shepherd sister who had been to their dream house.. Derek's mother had been to their old house, the one Alex now owned.

At some point Meredith must have fallen asleep, because she woke to her six-thirty alarm going off. Her body jolted awake and her heart raced as she grabbed the baby monitor. She listened for Bailey's cooing, but she didn't hear a sound. Her heart began to speed faster as she stumbled out of bed, which was when she noticed a strange aroma linger through her nose. She sniffed. It reminded her of when Izzie lived with her and would make breakfast in the morning.

She ran into the kitchen, where she found Amelia holding her son and standing over the stove.

"What are you cooking?" Meredith asked curiously, taking her son out of his aunt's arms.

"Homemade French Toast. I noticed you had a lot of frozen foods, so I wanted to make something fresh, and you didn't give me a lot of ingredients to choose from, so French toast it is," Amelia said with a gleaming smile.

"Yeah, I couldn't cook to save someone's life," Meredith said.

"Hey, it's all good. We all save lives in different ways. Breakfast is one of the only meals I'm actually good at cooking, to be honest. I couldn't cook a hamburger to save a life," Amelia laughed. "I hope you don't mind that I took Bailey from his crib. He was awake when I checked on him, and I wanted to allow you to get some sleep before he started crying. I gave him a bath and dressed him too."

Meredith noticed she'd dressed him in his blue overalls and a red shirt. He looked adorable.

"It's all good," Meredith smiled. "Thank you." She watched as Amelia flipped the French toast. "Forgive me for asking, but you seem really good with kids. Are you sure you don't want to be a mother?"

Amelia didn't say anything. When the French toast was finished browning, she asked, "Can you grab me a plate?"

"Of course," Meredith said, reaching for a plate and set it on the counter next to the stove.

"I know I'm good with kids," she said. "Nancy had her first born, Christopher, when I was five years old—she named him after Dad." Amelia paused and swallowed. "Dad was murdered three months before Chris was born. I was closer in age to Chris than I was Derek. I adored him, and then Michaela came along four years later. I loved babysitting my niece and nephew, and then Kate and Liz eventually started having kids. I was surrounded by my nieces and nephews growing up. So, it comes only natural.

Then...when I was thirteen, I started hanging out with some high school kids. They really screwed me up, and the next thing I knew…my sisters wouldn't let me near their kids. Meredith, this is why I can't be a mother. Because as you know, when you're a mother, there's no room for screwing up, and I seem to do a lot of screwing up. That's another reason I came here when Derek wasn't. He still looks at me like I'm a drug addict. I know we've gotten better over the last couple years, but you saw him the last time I was here. He didn't want me near Zola." She sniffled, setting the plate, now full of French toast. "Breakfast is ready."

"Thank you so much, Amelia. I really do appreciate it. I only wish Zola was here to enjoy this. She's so used to Cheerios for breakfast. This would be a real treat for her, though I'm sure Arizona is feeding her a good breakfast." Meredith thought of her little girl with her friend, enjoying a warm-cooked meal. She had never tasted Arizona's cooking, though she imagined she could cook. Arizona looked like the type of person who knew how to cook.

She enjoyed her French toast and offered a small bit to Bailey. He was starting to eat more solid foods. She made sure his food was cut up and cool before giving it to him. He seemed to really enjoy the French toast.

"Don't get too used to it, Buddy. Auntie Amelia won't be around forever," Meredith joked.

"You know, I could teach you how to make French toast. It's really easy. I learned how to do it when I was like four. No joke," Amelia laughed.

"You're lucky to have a mother who cooked when you were a kid," Meredith told her.

"Yeah, I am. My mother was an amazing cook, if I don't say so myself," Amelia sighed. "You know, I miss her cooking."

Meredith had admired Mrs. Shepherd's cooking over the holidays. She had cooked a smoked ham for Christmas dinner, along with the most beautiful Christmas cookies and cake balls Meredith had ever seen. Well, actually, Meredith had never seen a cake ball before. Everyone was shocked when she'd confessed that she'd never tried a cake ball. They were delicious. Mrs. Shepherd had also prepared the best green bean casserole Meredith had eaten in her life.

"So, nobody knows?" Meredith asked. "About the baby?"

"Just you," Amelia said bluntly, and then added, "And Liz...she's the only person I've told my plan, and I made her swear not to tell a soul. Liz is the only one of my sisters who can keep a secret if I make her promise. Plus, she, like my mother, has never been overly fond of Addison, so I don't have to worry about word getting back to L.A. For having the crazy rugrats she has, she really does have a heart of gold. Nancy and Kate...they're the biggest gossipers on the planet, I swear, plus they adore Addison. Kate actually coined the term _slutty intern_—"

Meredith's mouth dropped. "And to think I actually liked Kate," she said, adding, "or at least I thought I did."

Amelia laughed, then continued, "I had to call Liz, because she's the only one who's been to your house, so she could give me the address. Plus, she sends out those cheesy Christmas cards every year, so I figured she had your address handy on file."

Meredith's mouth opened, remembering Liz had been the sister who had donated part of her leg nerves to save Derek's hand. Liz had also been the first person outside of her and Derek she'd told she was pregnant with Bailey. Liz had known about her pregnancy before Cristina.

"Speaking of which, I was going to ask you how you'd found your way here without contacting Derek and me for the address," Meredith noted, having finished her plate of French toast. She noticed Amelia was also finished with her plate. "Since you did the cooking, the least I can do is the dishes," Meredith told Amelia.

"Oh, no, it's really not necessary. I'll do the dishes. You go take a shower and get ready for work. When's your first surgery?" Amelia asked kindly. Meredith raised a brow.

"I gotta say, Amelia, it seems like you're trying to suck up, and I'm not a fond of suck ups. And it's at nine," she said.

Amelia shrugged. "No sucking up here. Just being the kind, helpful sister-in-law," Amelia grinned, then winked at Meredith. _Sister-in-law_, Meredith thought. The word sounded weird, and even though she knew that was the technical term for her relationship to Amelia, it still sounded funny. Meredith had four sister-in-laws, but she never really thought of them as sisters.

"The kind, helpful sister-in-law who wants me to adopt her baby?" Meredith asked, raising an eyebrow. "Who's also going to schedule an appointment with O.B. today to have an ultrasound, right?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever," Amelia shrugged, gathering Bailey from his highchair. "Go get ready work. I'll take care of everything out here."

"Hm, you've been here for less than twelve hours, and you're already giving me commands?" Meredith inquired.

Amelia froze. "I mean no disrespect. I'm just trying to be helpful."

"And I appreciate it, believe me, I really do," Meredith assured, yet she was still leery. She wasn't sure if she trusted Amelia completely, especially with her son. She didn't know what to believe at this point. The idea of adopting another child at this time seemed so impossible. What were Amelia's real intentions? Did she want to drop this child off on Derek's and her doorsteps then disappear never to see the child again except at holidays? It was one thing for her and Derek to adopt Zola, whose parents were complete strangers and weren't in the picture. But if they did adopt Amelia's child, the child would also be their niece or nephew. He or she would always be bound to Amelia. And what if three or five or ten years later Amelia changed her mind? By then, Meredith and Derek would have bonded with the child and grown to love him or her. Though, if Amelia gave up legal rights to the child and she and Derek adopted him or her, then she would have no legal binding to the child.

It seemed like a messy situation to Meredith, and confusing nonetheless. These thoughts drowned in her head as she showered. The warm water splashed against her skin, and she was grateful to finally have a moment to shower. Yesterday she hadn't even had a chance to shower. It'd been the first day without Derek, and she'd had both kids at home. Bailey had been difficult to put to sleep, and Derek had been unavailable to sing him to sleep.

They were on day three of five now. In two days, Derek would be home.

And what did Amelia expect she do? That she would keep her presence a secret until Derek arrived? What was she supposed to tell Derek? He would not be happy knowing his wife had lied to him all this time. And heaven forbid he wanted to try to have another sexy video chat tonight or tomorrow. She'd pick him up from the airport the night after tomorrow night. Would Amelia go with her?

Meredith knew Derek wouldn't fall for Amelia's request. He wouldn't be game for adopting his niece or nephew. She knew he loved kids, and they'd talked about having a big family before. She'd even thrown the number "five" out before. He'd said he wanted two girls and two boys once. Though, after all the challenges they'd gone through to conceive and then to adopt Zola, and then her getting pregnant by surprise with Bailey, they were content with two kids. The idea of having more children seemed unbearable to Meredith. They already struggled with the two kids they had. There was no way they could take on a third at this time.

She didn't know how parents did it across the world. How families had five and more children. She knew many of the kids were raised by nannies, but Meredith didn't want that for her child. Her own mother had never been around when she was growing up, and Meredith had always resented her for that. Meredith didn't want her children to resent her for not being home. She didn't want them to be raised solely by nannies. She wanted her kids to have individual attention from both of their parents, and as far as she was concerned, she had the perfect family.

There was one for each her and Derek. She had her little girl to play dress up with and have tea parties and play dolls with, and Derek had his little boy who would grow up to love camping and fishing like his daddy. They were set. They didn't need another child in the mix. If they had another child, then they would be uneven. Someone would always feel left out, and Meredith would feel horrible about that.

She finished showering and grabbed a towel to dry her body. She dried her hair while the thoughts circled through her brain. She wanted to tell Derek that Amelia was there, but she'd promised Amelia she wouldn't. Even though she wasn't close to Amelia, she didn't want Amelia to get the idea that she wasn't trustworthy. Amelia had already told her so much, especially considering she barely even knew the woman who was her sister-in-law.

When she was dressed and ready for work, she made sure to run into Zola's room to grab a spare outfit, just in case, since Zola would be wearing the outfit that was her spare in the diaper bag. She put the clothes in a spare bag and headed into the living room, where she found Amelia sitting on the floor in the living room playing with Bailey.

"Well, I'm ready for work. You ready to go?" She looked at Amelia, who was dressed in jeans and a long-sleeved purple shirt. Her small bump was visible. Meredith wondered how Amelia had gone so long without knowing she was pregnant. Meredith had known she was pregnant with Bailey at three weeks, but then again, Meredith's periods were always right on track. She'd known when she was a day late that something was up. Even when she and Derek had been trying to conceive and through all the fertility treatments they'd tried, she'd never missed a period, except when she'd actually been pregnant.

"Yeah, we're good to go," Amelia smiled, lifting Bailey off the ground.

As they were leaving the house, Meredith's phone rang. Derek's name appeared on the caller identification.

"Hey, Derek," she answered, smiling. Amelia bit her lip and carried Bailey toward the car. Meredith unlocked the door and took the driver's seat while allowing Amelia to fasten Bailey into his car seat.

"I just had a free minute and wanted to call you to say good morning. It must be about seven-thirty there, right?" Derek asked.

Meredith looked at the clock in her car. "You hit it right on the nail. What time is it there?" Meredith had lived on the east coast for several years, but she was still terrible with converting Pacific Time to Eastern Time.

"It's ten-thirty," Derek said. "I'm on my way to a new session, so I don't have long. I just wanted to tell you I love you and that you're beautiful. I don't want to hold you up too long, because you're probably on your way to work."

"I'm just leaving the house, actually," Meredith said. "Bailey, it's Daddy. Say _Hi, Da-Da_." She turned her phone around and put the phone up to Bailey's ear.

"Hi, Bailey-boo," she heard Derek say to their son. She took the phone back.

"I'd let you talk to him longer, but I'm just about to pull out of the driveway," she said as Amelia opened the passenger seat and took a seat next to Meredith.

"Well, I'll let you go, then. I love you, Meredith," Derek's voice warmed her ear.

"I love you, too, and I can't wait until you're home," Meredith told her husband.

"Speaking of which...that's another thing I wanted to talk to you about. As much as I love this conference, I miss you and the kids, and I won't be missing much if I cut out on the last day. What do you think about me coming home a day early? Callie's desperately missing Sofia and Arizona as well, so we were both thinking about cutting out early…"

Meredith's heart raced. As much as she loved the idea, she hated that she loved it. She glanced at Amelia quickly as she backed out of the driveway and turned onto the road. "Oh, Derek, as much as I miss you and love the idea, I don't want me to be the reason you miss part of the conference. You should stay, Derek. I mean, how many people get to say they've been to a conference that the President of the United States hosted?"

"And I can say it and I've enjoyed my time here, I really have, but I've looked at the agenda for the last day, and there's really not a whole lot that interests me. I'd rather be home with you and the kids tomorrow evening than the next."

Meredith sighed. "Well, ultimately it's up to you, I guess." She looked at Amelia, whose interest had peaked.

"Then, it's settled. It's my decision, so I'm coming home tomorrow. Plan for me tomorrow evening, okay?" Derek said. "And we'll FaceChat tonight, right?"

"FaceTime," Meredith laughed. "And, yes, of course. The kids really loved it, and I should have Zola tonight, so Callie and Arizona can have their privacy."

"And we can have ours," Derek teased.

"We have two kids," Meredith reminded, knowing where he was going.

"Kids go to sleep fairly early," Derek pointed out.

"Don't you have a conference you have to be at?" Meredith asked.

"Oh, I see how it is, you don't want to talk to me anymore," Derek pouted. Meredith sighed and rolled her eyes.

"That's not it at all," Meredith protested. "I'm driving right now, and you know how much I hate talking on the phone and driving at the same time. And I'll see you tomorrow, Derek."

"Okay, I'll let you go. Love you, Meredith."

She ended the call without telling him she loved him back and glanced at Amelia through the corner of her eye while also focusing on the road. "Derek is coming home tomorrow night instead of the next," she told Amelia.

"What?" Amelia gasped. "No! Why didn't you tell him not to! Gosh darn it, I need more time."

"More time for what, Amelia?" Meredith asked.

"Uh, just more time with you, to get to know you," Amelia stumbled over her word, and Meredith wasn't ignorant to what Amelia really meant. What she really meant to say was _"To convince you to adopt my child so you'll convince Derek as well." _Meredith wasn't buying Amelia's kindness, and although Meredith found it slightly annoying, she had to admit she was already enjoying having Amelia around. She didn't want to get too used to it, because she knew that once Amelia realized that Derek and her weren't going to agree to adopt her child, she would be on the first flight out—that was, if Derek didn't kick her out the moment he returned home.

"You know, Derek is going to be pretty pissed if he comes home and finds out you're here and I didn't tell him," Meredith said slowly. "Last thing I think either of us wants is a pissed off Derek, but he won't be pissed at you. He'll be pissed at me, because I'll be the one who didn't tell him."

Amelia released a sigh. "Okay then, tell him I'm here." She paused and added, "But for the love of God, do not tell him _why _I'm here."

"I can agree to that," Meredith said with a weak smile on her face.

* * *

**A/N: Wow, the last couple days have been such a high. First, with the news of Ellen and Patrick signing on for two more years - which I'm absolutely thrilled about, and then Patrick tweeting fans. Can't wait to see what's in store next for MerDer (though, I'm a little scared as well. Hope all will end well, but who knows with Shonda). **


	4. Chapter 4

When they arrived at the hospital, Meredith parked in her usual spot. She unstrapped Bailey from his seat and told Amelia that she would drop her son off at daycare. She told Amelia to wait for her in the main lobby, where Meredith would meet her before going to her surgery, so she could schedule Amelia an appointment to see an O.B. Meredith knew she would be able to get Amelia in to see an O.B. much faster than if Amelia herself tried to schedule an appointment.

When she arrived in the daycare, she saw Arizona was also dropping Zola and Sofia off.

"Mommy!" Zola cried, running toward Meredith and Bailey. She wrapped her arms around her mother's waist and said, "I missed you."

Meredith smiled as her heart vibrated with warmth. Zola had missed her. She felt a little guilty to feel so satisfied. She kneeled down, shifting her son to one arm, to wrap an arm around her little girl. "I missed you, too, baby," she said, kissing Zola on the forehead. She looked up and saw Arizona looking down on her. "So, did the girls sleep well?"

Arizona laughed. "Not at all. I'm sure they'll have a nice nap in daycare. Won't you, girls?" Arizona looked at Sofia and Zola.

"I not sleep," Zola said.

"I not sleepy either," Sofia smiled, looking at her friend.

"Let's play, Sofi!" Zola giggled, running over to Sofia, and the girls ran toward three- and four-year-old section of the daycare and began playing with the dollhouse.

Meredith smiled at Arizona. "They're lucky to have each other. I'm glad Zola has a friend."

"Me, too," Arizona said with a yawn. "I love Zola to death, but I need to get some sleep tonight, and I'd love a private Skype date with my wife, so you know, Sofia is more than welcomed to spend the night at your house…"

"You're kidding, right?" Meredith laughed. "Don't get me wrong, I adore Sofia, but I have my hands full." She looked at the little guy in her arms.

"Oh, right," Arizona sighed. "I thought it was worth a shot."

"Did Callie tell you that she and Derek are considering leaving the conference a day early?" Meredith asked as she walked over toward the infant section of the daycare and handed her son over to one of the sitters.

"She did not!" Arizona gasped. "When did you hear that?"

"Derek called me a little bit ago," Meredith told her. She gave her son a kiss on the forehead. "You be a good boy, Bailey. Mommy will see you later. Love you, pumpkin. Bye-bye." She waved at her little guy.

"Bye-bye," Bailey repeated back.

Meredith and Arizona left the daycare room and Arizona said, "Well, I'll see you later. I have a phone call to make," and Arizona disappeared.

Meredith made a dash to change into her scrubs; she only had fifteen minutes before her scheduled surgery. She had no doubt in her mind that Edwards had prepped the patient, a forty-year-old woman who needed a hernia repair. Edwards had been on Meredith's service for months now, so she basically knew how to run it. Meredith had learned to trust her to the point that she didn't want any of the other residents on her service. The other resident who was even comparable was Jo, but she was of course always on Alex's service. In a way, Jo and Alex reminded Meredith of her and Derek during the early days of their relationship. Meredith imagined there was only a matter of time before Alex and Jo realized they couldn't work together and be together. Though, sometimes Meredith missed working with Derek. She had truly been passionate about neuro. Nonetheless, she knew it was better this way.

After she was fully dressed in her navy blue scrubs, she ran to main lobby, where she found Amelia sitting in a chair, reading _People Magazine_.

"Get up. Let's go," Meredith grabbed Amelia's hand and dragged her out of the chair, causing the magazine to fall out of Amelia's hand. She took Amelia to the gynecologic wing of the hospital and told the desk receptionist that she needed to schedule a routine ultrasound.

"The first open spot I have is at nine-thirty a.m. with Dr. Nichols," the receptionist said.

Meredith hadn't heard of Dr. Nichols. "What about Dr. Ryan?" Meredith asked, wondering if her gynecologist was available.

"Dr. Ryan is currently on maternity leave."

"Oh, well, offer her my congratulations," Meredith sighed, then looked toward Amelia.

"I want you there," Amelia said.

"What?" Meredith raised an eyebrow, wondering if this was part of Amelia's plan to get her to agree to adopt the baby. Did Amelia think that if she saw the baby on the ultrasound that she would suddenly get all warm and gooey inside and want to keep it? She may be a mother now, and although she wasn't a gynecologist, she'd seen her share of ultrasounds. The sole purpose of the ultrasound was to make sure the baby was healthy.

"Please, Meredith, don't make me go through this alone. I'm already on my own…"

"By choice," Meredith noted.

"Okay, yes, by choice, but I know you're not heartless," Amelia insisted. "I know you want everyone to think that you don't think family matters, but you do care. I saw it last night; otherwise you would have shipped me off to a hotel."

"Okay, whatever," Meredith said, turning to the receptionist. "We're going to need an appointment after noon." She quickly glanced at the clock, noting she only had a few minutes before she had to be in surgery.

"I can get you in with Dr. Moses at one," said the receptionist.

"Isn't Dr. Moses a resident?" Meredith asked, recognizing the name.

"She's a fourth-year resident, yes."

Meredith scowled, because she hoped to take the kids home early that day. She wanted to get them home before three. "Okay, book her for that, because I have a surgery I need to get to."

"What's the name of the patient?"

"Amelia Shepherd," Meredith said.

"Shepherd…as in Dr. Shepherd, the neurosurgeon?" the receptionist asked.

"I am a neurosurgeon," Amelia said proudly.

Meredith sternly looked into the receptionist's eyes. His eyes widened, shot with fear. "Um, right. I have Amelia Shepherd scheduled for an appointment at one o'clock today."

"Thank you," Meredith said and turned to Amelia. "I have to go."

"And what am I supposed to do while you're in surgery?" Amelia shrugged.

"I don't know, find a good magazine to read," Meredith insisted, heading toward the door.

"Wait, you and Derek are partial owners to this hospital, right? You can give me privileges, then?" Amelia insisted, running after Meredith.

"Huh? Whatever, you can do consults I guess," Meredith said.

"Awesome," Amelia grinned, satisfied with Meredith's response. They were still standing outside the gynecological wing when Alex Karev appeared. Meredith instantly noticed the curious expression on his face.

"Gee, Mer, I've been looking everywhere for you. Jo has been trying to page you. Your patient is ready and prepped for surgery. Oh, and you didn't tell me you were expecting again—"

"I'm not," Meredith immediately cut in. Alex's eyes widened as he looked at the woman standing next to Meredith. "You've met Derek's sister, right? Amelia."

"Oh, yeah, I remember you. You're the other neuro spawn in the Shepherd family," Alex said.

"That's me," Amelia smiled, extending her hand to shake Alex's.

"Did you say Jo was paging me?" Meredith suddenly remembered what Alex said. "I thought Edwards was my resident?"

"Edwards called in sick with the flu this morning, so Jo is filling in. She said she texted you, but apparently you're not checking your phone," Alex said.

Meredith patted her phone in her pocket. "Right, I have a lot going on right now." She looked at Amelia and then at Alex. "Alex, show Amelia where the scrubs and extra white coats are. I'm giving her temporary privileges to the hospital."

"Do you even have the authority to do that? I know you're an owner of the hospital now so you think you're the boss, but shouldn't you run that by Owen? I mean, he's the chief," Alex responded.

"I have to go, and don't question me," Meredith said, backing toward the elevator.

"Yeah, don't question her," Amelia agreed.

Meredith checked her phone once she was on the elevator to see that Stephanie had indeed texted her to tell her that she was sick, and Jo had paged her numerous times. She sent a quick text to Jo to tell her that she was on her way.

The surgery took less than two hours and was a success. By the time the patient was back in her room and awake, it was twelve-thirty. Meredith noted that Amelia's appointment was in a half hour. Tracking down Amelia would be the challenge now. Meredith hoped that Amelia hadn't gotten herself into a surgery. Meredith hoped Amelia knew better than to do that. However, from what Derek had told her and the vibe she'd gotten from Amelia, Meredith sensed Amelia was prone to act sporadically and irrationally. She was beginning to regret her decision to tell Amelia she could have privileges at the hospital, but Meredith hadn't known what to do at the time. She was in a hurry and hadn't wanted to argue with her. She knew that Alex did have a point. It hadn't been her place to tell Amelia she could have privilege in the hospital. When Owen found out, she sensed she would hear about it, and Derek wouldn't be too happy about it either.

_Derek_.

As she was trying to track down Amelia, she noticed she had a voicemail from Derek. Instead of checking her voicemail, she decided to just call Derek right back, hoping he would answer. It was already three-thirty on the east coast now.

"You've reached Dr. Derek Shepherd. I'm currently working on a making medical history. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you at my earliest convenience.."

There was something about her husband's arrogance that turned her on.

"Hey, Derek. It's Meredith. Call me when you can. There's something I need to tell you." Meredith ended the call and looked ahead into the patient room ahead. She saw Amelia Shepherd with Shadow Shepherd. She was dressed in navy blue scrubs and talking to a patient who was lying in the hospital bed.

"Amelia," Meredith hissed as she entered the room.

"Thank God, Dr. Grey," Dr. Nelson, also known as _Shadow Shepherd_, released a sigh of relief. "This woman is completely and inappropriately trying to steal my patient from me. She says her name is Dr. Shepherd, but obviously she's not. I believe she's an imposter!"

Meredith couldn't help but chuckle lightly. She looked at Amelia, whose eyes begged for help. Meredith said, "This is Derek's sister, Amelia. She's also a neurosurgeon and is visiting from Los Angeles. I'm terribly sorry if she's caused you any problems, Dr. Nelson," Meredith said with a smile on her face.

He scoffed. "Well, she doesn't have rights in this hospital, and she certainly doesn't have the authority to _steal _my patients."

"I am right here," the patient said, rolling her eyes. She looked at Meredith.

"I'm so sorry for the confusion and hostility. They really shouldn't be arguing in front of you," Meredith said, extending her arm to shake the patient's hand. "I'm Dr. Grey."

"I've heard of you. You're Dr. Shepherd's—the other Dr. Shepherd—wife, right?"

Meredith nodded. "I am."

"I'm Stacy," the patient said, "and I originally was referred to your husband, but then I was told that he was too busy, so then I was referred to Dr. Nelson. He told me that my tumor is inoperable, but the other Dr. Shepherd, the one standing right here, told me that she thinks she can operate, and if that's true, then I want to take that chance, if there's a small chance I can live longer than the three to six months Dr. Nelson is giving me."

"I'm terribly sorry that Dr. Shepherd here is giving you false hope, Stacy," Dr. Nelson said sincerely, placing his hand on the patient's wrist.

"Mer, if you see the scans…" Amelia said, handing the papers to Meredith.

Meredith studied the scans and noted the size of the tumor. She could see why Shadow Shepherd was hesitant to operate, but she had performed similar surgeries with Derek during her residency. Derek, however, was famous for operating on patients who had been told their tumors were inoperable. She could see Amelia also shared that element of risk-taking.

"So?" Amelia asked. Meredith looked at the clock and saw Amelia's appointment was in three minutes.

She pointed to the clock and said, "I think we can talk about this when we're on the way to your appointment, Amelia." Meredith turned to the patient, "I'm terribly sorry for the confusion, but Amelia has somewhere she needs to be in three minutes."

"Do you think my tumor is operable?" the patient called after Meredith and Amelia departed the room.

"Jeez, the doctors at this hospital must have been sleeping during the bedside manner unit." Amelia rolled her eyes.

"I'm sorry for pulling you out while you were talking to a patient, but you knew about this appointment before you ever got yourself involved with a patient," Meredith said.

"I wasn't talking about that. I was talking about that Dr. Nelson. He shouldn't be allowed to see patients. He started attacking me right in front of that patient," Amelia insisted. "I seriously think you should talk to the chief about him."

"With our luck, he'll say something to the chief about _you_," Meredith hissed.

"About me? All I'm trying to do is save that poor woman's life! He wants to send her home to die. You saw the scans. I know you're not a neurosurgeon, but you spent a lot of time studying under Derek during your residency, didn't you?" Amelia asked.

"That's beside the point." Meredith rolled her eyes as they arrived at their destination. "But don't worry. You won't be the one who gets your ass chewed out. It'll be me." She knew that Amelia had good intentions, but she also knew that Alex had been right. Even though she was a partial owner of the hospital, she technically didn't have the authority to give Amelia rights to the hospital. She should have told her to run it past Hunt first. Though, Meredith wasn't too worried. Shadow Shepherd wasn't looked upon too highly anyway; after all, he was no Derek. However, now that Derek was a big shot working on the president's research, most of Derek's former patients had been referred to him.

She checked Amelia in at the desk. The receptionist told them to take a seat and the doctor would be with them shortly. Meredith didn't know why she was doing this for her sister-in-law whom she barely knew. Amelia was an adult who was more than capable of doing this for herself. Meredith released a sigh as she took a seat next to Amelia.

"See? Why the rush? The doctor isn't even ready anyway. We give patients an appointment, and then we're never ready on time," Amelia said.

Meredith chuckled at Amelia's claim, because she knew it was true. She smiled and studied Amelia. It was evident that she was definitely Derek's relation. Her captivating blue eyes reminded Meredith very much of her husband's. Her dark brown hair matched Derek's as well. Amelia also was skilled at getting people to submit to her will. When she wanted something, she fought for it. Meredith could see why Derek and Amelia often clashed; they were very much alike. As far as Meredith knew, though, her husband had never tried drugs.

Looking at Amelia caused Meredith to realize how much she missed Lexie. Sitting here with Amelia at her O.B. appointment was something Meredith would have done for Lexie. She thought of how Amelia had taken care of Bailey that morning. It reminded Meredith of how Lexie had taken care of Zola when she was little. She missed Lexie so much.

"Amelia Shepherd," a nurse called Amelia's name. Meredith walked alongside her sister-in-law to meet the nurse. "Hello, Dr. Grey," the nurse smiled weakly at her. Meredith recognized the nurse from her own O.B. appointments when she was pregnant with Bailey. Her name was Sheena DeLange. Meredith smiled wryly at Nurse Sheena. "And hello, Amelia. I'm guessing you're Dr. Shepherd's sister?"

"The big-shot neurosurgeon is indeed my brother," Amelia said proudly.

"Well, Amelia, I'm just going to have to record your weight. If you could step on the scale…"

Amelia stepped on the scale without removing her shoes. Meredith noted the scale weighed her at 117 pounds. The nurse also measured Amelia's height, which came out to 5'4".

"Looking good," the nurse said as she guided Amelia and Meredith to an exam room. Amelia took a seat on the exam table, and Meredith stood next to her. The nurse looked at Amelia, "Now, how far along do you think you are?"

Amelia shrugged. "I'm really not sure. I've always been irregular, but I'd guess 18-20 weeks."

Sheena's eyes widened as she looked at Meredith, who shrugged. She, too, couldn't understand going so long without having prenatal care, though Meredith had seen the TV show _I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant_, and she'd even had a patient once who thought she had gallstones. It turned out she was in labor. Meredith didn't understand it, but she also knew every woman's body was different.

"All right, then," Sheena said. "I'll just need to collect some medical history from you before the doctor comes in."

"Yeah, yeah, I know the drill. I'm a doctor." Amelia rolled her eyes. There were some very obvious indicators that made it clear that Amelia was the baby of the family, Meredith had noticed. She had noticed Amelia didn't seem to have much of a filter, and she behaved immaturely at times. Although she did share numerous personality characteristics with her brother, she was different in those ways.

Sheena proceeded to ask Amelia a series of standard questions.

"Is there a history of diabetes in your family?" Nurse Sheena asked.

"No," Amelia quickly responded. Sheena proceeded to ask Amelia if there was a history of gestational diabetes, which Amelia also answered no to. As Sheena continued to ask questions and Amelia responded _No_, Meredith realized that she herself didn't know anything about the Shepherd family medical history, so she didn't even know if Amelia was being truthful. She hoped Amelia knew better than to lie about her medical history. Being a doctor herself, she should. On the contrary, Meredith found herself developing a curiosity about her husband's family history. After all, they did have a biological son together. If there was a history of illness in his family, she wanted to know. She wanted her son to live as healthy of a life as possible. He'd already been exposed to the Alzheimer's gene, since thanks to Dr. Bailey's gene mapping, Meredith had learned that she had inherited her mother's gene for the disease.

When Sheena finished her line of questioning, she took Amelia's temperature and blood pressure. She then told Amelia that the doctor would be in shortly, and she left the room.

Amelia scowled. "I hate being treated like a patient."

Meredith did know where Amelia was coming from, considering that she herself had been under the knife several times. Plus, she had just given birth less than a year ago. "I know where you're coming from, but she was just doing her job. Everyone is a patient at some point in their life."

"We doctors make the worst patients, don't we?" Amelia said teasingly.

"That we do," Meredith nodded.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Same author (Liv Cassidy); I've just recycled a pen name so my name is fandom neutral. This chapter is full of goodies, including the return of a past well-known character. _Dun dun dun..._**

* * *

It wasn't long before Dr. Moses entered the room. Meredith had seen her around the hospital several times, and she also remembered her from when Meredith had spent some time in O.B. during her fifth year. Dr. Moses had only been a second-year resident at the time. She was a tall, dark-skinned woman. Meredith had always imagined she was a basketball or volleyball player in high school. Her dark brown hair was in a bun, and she had kind, coffee brown eyes. She wore light-pink scrubs, like all the O.B. residents did.

"Hey, Meredith. Long time no see," Dr. Moses extended her hand to shake Meredith's hand. Meredith hadn't realized they were on a first-name basis and was ashamed to admit that she didn't know Dr. Moses's first name. Meredith smiled as she shook Dr. Moses's hand. Dr. Moses then turned to Amelia. "And you must be…" She paused as she stared at the name. "Amelia Shepherd?"

"My sister-in-law," Meredith explained, though it still felt weird to refer to Amelia as her _sister-in-law_. It was going to take some getting used to.

"Ah, I figured. It's nice to meet you, Amelia. I'm Dr. Moses, but you can call me Nadia," Nadia smiled warmly toward Amelia and extended her hand to shake Amelia's.

"Well, it's nice to meet someone around here who treats me like a human being at last, Nadia." Amelia glowed as she shook Nadia's hand.

"I like to be on a first-name basis with my patients, because they're generally stuck with me for nine months," laughed Nadia. "Now, anyway, back to you. You told Sheena that you think you're about 18 to 20 weeks?"

"Yes," Amelia admitted. "I know you must think that's embarrassing. I'm a doctor and my best friend is an obstetrician, yet I didn't begin to suspect I was pregnant until a couple weeks ago."

"Ah, I heard that M.D.s ran in the Shepherd lineage," said Nadia. Meredith was impressed with how she talked to Amelia as if she were a friend, not a patient. She could tell that Dr. Moses was skilled at the art of bedside manner, something she, too, strived to be good at. Beside manner, as Amelia had pointed out earlier, was something so many doctors lacked. Meredith had always found Derek to be quite charming with his patients as well.

There were times during the early years of their relationship that she had found herself slightly jealous of his female patients. Occasionally, she felt like he was flirting with them. She never voiced this to him, though, because she didn't want to upset him. She later realized that was just his bedside manner, and it was how he managed to make his patients feel comfortable. Although she also knew that a number of his patients had developed a crush on him—though who could blame them? She remembered hearing about one of his patients who had a chronic blushing disorder and would blush excessively every time he was in the room. Although it had upset Meredith a little bit at the time, she now found it hilarious to think back on. Her husband was hot, so she was used to women crushing on him. Hell, April Kepner had once had a crush on him. Meredith still liked to tease April about that occasionally, even though she knew April was ashamed about it. Whenever she brought it up, April's cheeks would turn as red as her hair.

"My mother raised five doctors," Amelia confessed.

"She must be proud of you all. Were your parents doctors as well?"

"My mom was a Navy Nurse, which is how she met my dad," Amelia paused for a moment. "And after my dad retired from the navy, he opened up a grocery store while my mom stayed at home to raise us kids."

"That's impressive. Well, Amelia, I'm looking at your chart now, and everything looks good so far. I'm going to need you to remove everything from the waist down, so I can perform an ultrasound, then I'll be able to confirm exactly how far along you are and estimate your due date."

Without hesitation, Amelia removed her clothes and rested on the exam table. Nadia prepped Amelia for her ultrasound, and Amelia gazed over toward Meredith, who inched closer to Amelia. Although she sensed Amelia was trying to hide her fear, Meredith noticed a hint of anxiety in Amelia's crystal blue eyes. She squinted as the doctor iced the cold jelly over Amelia's small pregnant belly. Meredith noticed Amelia's hand dangling, and without thinking, she grabbed her sister-in-law's frail, iceberg hand. Amelia gripped tightly onto Meredith's palm.

It just felt right. Meredith knew she didn't have to hold Amelia's hand. After all, Amelia was a full-grown adult, who was more than capable of taking care of herself. For years, Amelia had just been "one of the wolves." She was just Derek's younger sister who he happened to butt heads with. Meredith had barely interacted with her. She barely knew her. And then, just yesterday, the woman had showed up at her doorstep asking her and her husband to adopt the baby inside her womb.

None of it made much sense to Meredith. Then again, she had gathered from the little time she'd spent with Derek's little sister, and what Derek had told her, Amelia wasn't an entirely sensible person. She certainly a tad eccentric, but there was some element about Amelia that intrigued Meredith.

Meredith understood that some women weren't supposed to be mothers; after all, her mother was a prime example. Ellis Grey had loved her only child, in her own way. Her work always came first, though. Working was how Ellis coped. It was what gave her a reason to live. She didn't live for her child. She lived for her career.

When she became a doctor, Meredith knew she had big shoes to fill. She'd been told her entire life that she was worthless and only ordinary. Meredith had always had low self-esteem. Her mother didn't approve of her, so why should anyone else? By the time she graduated from medical school, her mother's health was deteriorating from Alzheimers'. Coincidentally, during her intern year, Meredith had befriended her mother's mini. Cristina Yang soon became her best friend.

Cristina poured her heart and soul into her job, and Meredith thought she would, too, but then everything changed when she fell in love with a man who turned her world upside down. Derek Shepherd had turned her into someone she, nor Cristina, could see coming.

Meredith never wanted to be a mother, because the last thing she wanted was for her children to go through what she had as a child. Cristina knew that work would always become before a child, and she was adamant about never having children. That's when her relationship tumbled apart, when Owen realized that she didn't want to have children. Then there was the abortion.

Cristina could have just as easily carried the child to term and then put him or her up for adoption, but she chose to terminate the pregnancy because she knew that if she had the baby, she would love it. And that had terrified her. Cristina had been her best friend; her twisted sister. Meredith understood Cristina's motives entirely, and why she had done what she did.

Being a mother had never been part of Meredith's dreams. There were women who dreamed their entire lives of having children. Meredith never had "Mommy fever" when she was a teenager; it was natural for a woman's body to want to nurture another human being. She'd never had that desire. She never went "goo-goo-ga-ga." Babies were cute, and she adored them, but she'd never wanted one of her own. And then everything changed, and when she found out her uterus was hostle was when she started to yearn for a baby the most. It's funny how people always want what they can't have.

Now, she had two beautiful babies, and she had no regrets.

But there was something about Amelia's request that Meredith couldn't make sense of. Amelia specifically wanted to _keep her child in the family_. If she just didn't want to be a mother, she could just as easily give her child up for adoption, and any nice couple would happily adopt her baby. If she wanted to watch her child grow up, she could file for an open adoption, but even then, it's not the same. Amelia wanted to have full access to her son or daughter whenever she wanted, but she didn't want to be responsible for raising him or her. That alone terrified Meredith.

Meredith would never forget the nightmare they'd gone through to adopt Zola. There were the sleepless nights she'd gone through wondering if she would ever see her daughter again. What if Amelia changed her mind? Three or four years down the line? What if she realized she made a mistake? And by then, she would have bonded with the baby. She would love the child as her own. Then, Amelia could rip him or her from her arms. Of course, if they made the adoption legally binding, Amelia wouldn't have that authority. But in Meredith's gut, she knew that's not what Amelia wanted. Then there would be an entire court process to go through, and if Amelia really wanted to sign the rights to her child away, then she could have just given her baby to anyone. Meredith knew what Amelia was up to.

"Hi, baby," Nadia said, and the baby appeared on the monitor. Amelia's eyes widened as she looked at the screen. "Here's the head." An enlarged image of the baby's face appeared on the screen. "And here's the heartbeat." The thumping of the baby's heartbeat became audible.

"The baby has a brain," Amelia whispered, and her face lit up when she saw the baby's little spooky face; the fetus's face was shaped normally, like a skull mask. Meredith wondered if knowing the baby was healthy would change Amelia's mind about giving the baby away.

Nadia rotated the ultrasound, and the baby's pearly spine came into focus. Her face was still as she took shots of the baby.

"Everything is okay, right?" Amelia asked nervously. "Where'd the heartbeat go?" Amelia's jaw dropped with panic as the room suddenly went silent.

"Relax, Amelia," Nadia said as she moved the wand around, and the baby's heartbeat could be heard again. "We'd just moved out of range."

Meredith listened carefully to the baby's heartbeat. She noticed a faint whooshing sound; notably, a heart murmur. Heart murmurs were common, especially in babies, and they often disappeared in time. Meredith had read a statistic somewhere that indicated eighty percent of children had a heart murmur at some point.

"Meredith, what's wrong?" Amelia asked.

"Huh?" Meredith lifted an eyebrow, not wanting to alarm Amelia.

"Your face says something is wrong. Is there something she's not telling me?" Amelia asked, referring to Nadia.

"Everything is fine, Amelia," Nadia assured. "Your baby seems to be the adequate size for twenty weeks, given you haven't had any prenatal care. You're really lucky. With proper prenatal care for the remainder of your pregnancy, you should have a healthy baby. Now, would you like to know the gender?"

Meredith looked at the ultrasound and remembered that she and Derek had figured out by counting the baby's fingers and toes. She looked closely at the baby's hands and found herself counting Amelia's baby's fingers and toes. _Seven, eight, nine, ten...eleven. It's a boy_, though Meredith bit her lip.

"No," Amelia said, looking away from the ultrasound. "I don't want to know."

The fetus's murmur seemed to be getting stronger, and Meredith couldn't ignore it. She didn't want to say anything to upset Amelia, though, so Meredith turned to Nadia. "May I have a word with you outside, Doctor Moses?" she asked Nadia.

"I knew it," Amelia gasped. "Something is wrong, isn't it? Meredith, just say it in front of me. I can take it. I'm a doctor too."

Meredith released a sigh, and Nadia looked with confusion at Meredith. "What is it, Meredith?"

"It's just...listen, Dr. Moses. Do you hear a murmur?"

"I did notice a faint murmur, yes, but more than eighty percent of babies have heart murmurs present at some point. They generally grow out of them," Dr. Moses insisted.

"Don't you think it would be a wise idea to do a fetal echocardiogram just to be on the safe side?" Meredith asked. "I mean, it's what I would do."

"Wait, you noticed a _murmur_ and didn't say anything to me?" Amelia inhaled a deep breath. "Isn't that, like, illegal? Aren't doctors supposed to give full disclosure with their patients? Or is that not the protocol here in Seattle! You've got to be kidding me!"

"Amelia, calm down," Dr. Moses said softly. "I didn't say anything, because like I said, murmurs are present in eighty percent of infants, and most of the time they're completely harmless."

"And you know as well as I know, or you should at least, that 'most of the time' isn't good enough. Given my previous pregnancy history, I want to know everything, and I want a fetal echocardiogram ordered _now_."

"Of course, Amelia," Dr. Moses sighed, giving Meredith a look, and leaving Meredith and Amelia alone in the patient room.

Amelia let out a loud scoff. "This is why I wanted you here, Meredith. Damn residents don't know shit."

"Chances are it's nothing," Meredith replied assuringly.

"If I were anyone else, then chances are it would be nothing, but I'm also the woman who gave birth to a baby without a brain. So, for me, chances are it's something. And if this baby has a congenital heart defect, the sooner it's caught, the better chance he or she has at survival."

"I gotta say, Amelia, for not wanting this baby, you seem to care an awful lot for him," Meredith spat out, and she noticed Amelia's eyes widen, and Meredith quickly added, "or her."

"It's a boy, isn't it?" Amelia whispered. "You read the ultrasound."

"I'm not a gynecologist," Meredith said flatly. "But, I'm pretty sure that, yes, your baby is a boy."

"Wow," Amelia put her hand over her belly. "A boy. Maybe there's a chance of evening out the boy to girl ratio in our family yet." She chuckled lightly. Meredith shared a smile with Amelia. To date, Carolyn Shepherd had ten granddaughters and six grandsons. "I'm sure you and Derek will raise him well." Meredith's smile curved downward, and she didn't respond to Amelia's comment.

Dr. Moses returned with her attending, who Meredith didn't recognize at first, but when she did, her mouth dropped. Her hair was quite longer than it had been the last time Meredith had seen her. Her long blonde hair was down to her waist. Her green eyes twinkled when the light hit her just right. She was tall, lengthy, blonde and beautiful; after all, Alex used to call her "Dr. Model" considering she modeled in magazines to pay her way through med school.

"Izzie!" Meredith gasped. Her heart dropped.

"Meredith? Oh, my God. You're still here," Izzie reached out and wrapped her arms around her former roommate.

"You're here, in this hospital, and how didn't I know? Why didn't you tell me?" Meredith interrogated.

"I just started yesterday. I was trying to keep it on the down-low. Oh, my God. Hunt told me about the plane crash and the hospital being renamed in Lexie's and Mark's memory when he hired me. It's so sad. I didn't ask if you were still here. I figured we'd run into each other eventually, if you were. Who else is still here? I'm guessing McDreamy is. What about Cristina?" Meredith nodded, and Izzie whispered hoarsely, "Alex?" Meredith nodded again. "Oh, God. Don't tell him I'm here, please. I mean, I know we'll cross paths eventually, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there."

Meredith nodded, and swallowed. She imagined Izzie didn't know that her ex-husband was in a serious relationship with one of his residents. _Perfect timing, Izzie_, Meredith thought. She didn't want to be the one to tell Alex that was Izzie back in town and in the hospital. Though, it was only a matter of time before they crossed paths. She imagined Izzie didn't know that Alex was a pediatric surgeon, and peds surgeons often crossed paths with gynecologists for the obvious reasons.

"Um, I take it you know each other," Amelia observed.

"Izzie was in my intern class," Meredith explained.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I'm Dr. Isobel Stevens," Izzie extended her hand to shake Amelia's. "I'm an attending, and Dr. Moses has informed that she picked up a murmur on your initial ultrasound—"

Meredith coughed. "_I _picked up," she cut in, secretly wondering if Dr. Moses had really noticed the murmur on her own.

"Anyway," Izzie continued, "so we're going to perform a fetal echocardiogram. I'll explain…"

"You don't need to explain. I'm a doctor. I know the lowdown. I just want to know if the baby is healthy, okay?" Amelia insisted.

"She's Derek's sister," Meredith informed Izzie.

"Oh," Izzie's eyes widened. "That explains everything, then. Let me get you set up, and we'll get started."

Izzie prepared the echocardiogram as Dr. Moses observed. The baby's heart soon appeared on the fetal monitor, and the sound of the baby's heart rhythm could be heard. Meredith once again noticed the irregular whooshing sound, the murmur.

She noticed the frown on Izzie's face. She looked toward Dr. Moses and whispered, "Page cardio."

"What's wrong? What is it?" Amelia asked. Meredith looked closely at the monitor, and although cardio wasn't her speciality, she noted the tiny valve obstruction. She would diagnose the baby with congenital pulmonary stenosis, but she didn't say anything for Amelia's sake. "You know, you people have terrible bedside manner! I'm the patient here, and I'm freaking out. You're supposed to be calming me! Hello_?_!"

Izzie smiled softly and placed her hand on Amelia's shoulder. "You know, they say doctors make the worst patients. You know why? It's because we know how to read faces, and we also know when something's wrong. It's also why we have the best survival rates, because we know when to question when our doctors tell us everything's okay."

"You're the one who had cancer, aren't you?" Amelia questioned. Izzie looked at Meredith, who shrugged. "Yeah, I heard about you. Addison told me that you're the reason my brother didn't quit being a doctor. I never pictured that my brother could ever doubt himself. I mean, he's such a cocky ass most of the time; I always thought it was perfect, but Addie told me about how he lost a patient and it really got to him, and then he came back to save your life?"

Meredith was surprised with how much Amelia seemed to know about what happened here in Seattle, whereas she knew so little about what happened in Los Angeles. She knew which patient Amelia was talking about; Addison had been in Seattle at the time because her brother needed a brain operation that Derek had successfully completed. At the same time, one of Meredith's and Derek's patients, who also happened to be pregnant, needed an operation. After a series of operations, they lost the patient, and Derek took it really hard. It was also conveniently around the time he'd planned to propose to Meredith, which had led to a string of other dramatic events. In the end, they'd gotten through it, but Meredith still hadn't known that Derek was talking to Addison. Well, she knew that Derek and Addison obviously were somewhat in contact, because Addison had contacted Derek about her brother. Still, she was a little shocked.

She didn't know why Derek having contact with his ex-wife bothered her so much. They were married for twelve years, so it was only natural that they would be friends. In the end, Derek chose Meredith. He was the father of her children. Meredith trusted that Derek and Addison were nothing more than friends, though a piece of her still felt jealous. She was his ex-wife, after all, and he hadn't mentioned that he still talked to her. She decided that she would ask Derek about it later, though she didn't want to upset him either.

Cristina entered the room and stopped dead when she saw Izzie. "Well, look at who's been resurrected from the dead," Cristina observed.

"Probably shouldn't joke about that," Meredith responded slyly. She and Cristina had come to terms with the fact they weren't as close as they used to be, but there was still a certain element of tension when they were in the same room together. Although they'd agreed things were different now, words had been said that couldn't be taken back. Cristina used to be Meredith's closest friend in the entire world. At one point, they were inseparable; now they were lucky to say two words to each other in a day.

"No, it's okay," Izzie insisted. "It's nice to see you again, too, Cristina." She looked back and forth between Cristina and Meredith, seeming to notice the element of tension in the room.

"What's going on? Why have I been paged?" Cristina asked, and then looked at Amelia. "Wait, aren't you one of the Shepherd wolves?"

"Is that what Derek is referring to us as now?" Amelia asked, chuckling lightly.

"This is Amelia," Meredith introduced Amelia to Cristina.

"Oh, right. I remember you. You're the druggie," Cristina noted.

Amelia's eyes widened, seemingly impressed by Cristina's bluntness. "Former druggie," Amelia admitted then sighed. "I've been clean for two years."

"Good to know," Cristina said, and her eyes yielded on the heart monitor. "I'm Dr. Yang, and I'm a cardiothoracic surgeon. Looking at the monitor, it appears your unborn child has a condition known as congenital pulmonary stenosis. Given you're a surgeon yourself, I'd like to presume you know what that is and I won't have to go into the nitty gritty."

An element of terror overrode Amelia's face. "I-I'm a neurosurgeon," Amelia said softly, "and I know that stenosis occurs when there is an abnormal n-narrowing of a passage. Intracranial artery stenosis occurs frequently with older patients, and can be treated with medication or surgery, if medication fails to work. Oh, God. I slept through the heart units in college and only shadowed neurosurgeons all throughout my residency. All I know is brains."

"Well, then," Cristina sighed. "You'll be happy to know that pulmonary artery stenosis is completely treatable, and the chances of your baby living a normal life are high. You'll be monitored closely throughout the remainder of your pregnancy, and once you deliver, your baby will be monitored closely by a pediatric and a cardiothoracic doctor, who will then will perform a balloon valvuloplasty."

"Maybe you should have stayed in Los Angeles," Meredith sighed. "You know, Addison is the best neonatal surgeon in the country, or so I've heard."

"Addie can't know," Amelia quickly retorted. She turned to Cristina. "Introduce me to your best pediatric surgeon."

Meredith sighed, looking back and forth between Izzie and Cristina. "I would recommend paging Dr. Robbins."

Cristina widened her eyes. "Why? What's wrong with Alex?" And Izzie's eyes widened. Cristina's mouth rounded, "Oh."

"Alex is a _pediatric surgeon_?" Izzie gasped. Meredith nodded. "Wow! Seriously? _Seriously? _I never would have pegged _Alex Karev _for a pediatric surgeon. I mean, I knew he'd worked some peds cases, but I didn't think he'd actually stay there. He was always interested in plastics, though Mark wasn't the best teacher. I guess I shouldn't speak ill of the dead."

Meredith and Cristina exchanged looks. Meredith could sense that Cristina was thinking the exact same thing that she was. _Izzie had not changed._

"Right, well, I'll page Robbins," Cristina said.

As Cristina lifted her phone, Meredith's phone buzzed in her pocket. _Derek? _She hoped as she pulled out her phone. Her text message wasn't from Derek, though. It was Hunt.

_Meet me in my office STAT. _


	6. Chapter 6

Meredith's stomach tied into a tight knot as she left Amelia alone with Cristina and Izzie. She knew what was coming, so she wasn't surprised when she opened the chief's office to find Dr. Nelson sitting in front of Hunt's desk. She inhaled a deep breath of oxygen into her lungs. "You paged, Dr. Hunt?" She looked back and forth between Owen Hunt and Shadow Shepherd, sensing the anger heightening in Nelson's face. He looked like he was about to burst.

"Take a seat, Dr. Grey," Owen said.

Meredith crossed her arms. "Whatever it is, Dr. Hunt, you say it to me while I'm standing."

"All right, then," Owen said slowly. "Dr. Nelson has just told me quite an interesting story about how a female doctor, claiming to be named Dr. Shepherd, ripped a patient's scans right from his hands, and proceeded to tell his patient that she believed she could operate on the patient's tumor, which Dr. Nelson had already declared inoperable. He then told me that you barged in and dragged this Dr. Shepherd away, taking the scans with you. Now, Meredith, given that the only Dr. Shepherd who is authorized to see patients here is in Washington D.C., as you can imagine, I'm a little confused here, and judging by the look on your face, you know exactly what I'm talking about." Owen looked sternly at Meredith.

Meredith exhaled. "Amelia—Dr. Shepherd—is Derek's younger sister. She was in town and needed something to do, so I told her she could consult with patients."

"And why did you do that without informing the chief, Dr. Grey?" Owen inquired.

"I'm a partial owner of this hospital, so I didn't think it was necessary, Chief," Meredith replied.

"But I'm the chief of surgery, so I'm responsible for what happens in this surgical unit. If a doctor who doesn't have privileges at this hospital steps inside an O.R. and kills a patient, it's on me." Owen's voice rose as he sternly gazed at Meredith.

"Dr. Hunt, I'm sure Amelia meant no harm. She practices neurosurgery in Los Angeles and has a great record. She's also worked on a few cases with Derek, and if she believes she can remove this patient's tumor, then I would let her try. I saw the scan, and I removed a similar tumor with Derek during my residency. It's risky, but I'd say it's doable," Meredith insisted.

Dr. Nelson scoffed. "Giving her the right to cut into that patient is murder, and could easily turn into a lawsuit! There's no way that she can get to the tumor without paralyzing the patient entirely or killing her. Your Shepherd clan might like to take risks, but that's why Derek Shepherd's fatality rate is twenty times higher than mine! I don't know what's going on here, but it looks like the Shepherd siblings are trying to see who can kill the most patients."

"Dr. Nelson," Dr. Hunt said warningly, then looked at Meredith. "You said that you performed a similar surgery with Derek during your residency? Was it successful?"

Meredith nodded. "Yes, we were able to remove the tumor entirely and the patient woke up and was fine. The surgery was deemed a success." She realized Stacy's file was still in her hand, from when Amelia had handed it to her. Then she realized something that hadn't crossed her mind. She was holding a manila envelope, although most of their patient files were in the cloud now. That meant Dr. Nelson had gone through the extra trouble to print Stacy's scans out. If Dr. Nelson hadn't printed the scans, then Amelia wouldn't have been able to rip the scans from his hands. She handed the envelope to Hunt. "Here is the patient's file."

Confusion swept over Hunt's face as he looked at Dr. Nelson. "Did you print the patient's file off?"

"I print off all my patients' files," Dr. Nelson said. "I like to have a hard copy in my hands."

"We went in the cloud for a reason," Dr. Hunt told Dr. Nelson. "Think of how many trees you're killing by printing off all your patients' files."

"Right, and then when we lose power, like we did in that big storm last year, we're screwed. I think we should always have a physical copy of our patients' files. You never know when the computer systems are going to file! You people and your reliance on technology." Dr. Nelson rolled his eyes.

"Dr. Nelson, leave," Dr. Hunt said.

"What?" Dr. Nelson's eyes widened.

"You heard me. Get out of my office, and Stacy Meyer is no longer your patient," Dr. Hunt told Shadow Shepherd, whose jaw dropped.

"I don't understand," Dr. Nelson whispered. He was met by Dr. Hunt's stern gaze. Nelson stomped out of the room like a child. Meredith held back a chuckle.

Owen turned to Meredith. "Okay, where's Dr. Amelia Shepherd now?"

"Uh," Meredith said. "She's somewhere around here. I told her not to see any more patients. I'll go find her, all right?"

"You do that, and tell her that I want Stacy Meyer to be her first priority now. If there's a chance we can save this woman's life, then I want to take it." She noticed as Hunt gazed over the patient's file, and then she handed it back to Meredith. "Go find your sister-in-law."

"Right," Meredith turned around to leave, but before she exited the room, she turned to Hunt. "If you talk to Derek, don't tell him that Amelia's here. He doesn't know yet. Please."

"Okay," Owen said, though Meredith could sense the bewilderment in his voice. Meredith left the room and sought out to find Amelia.

She realized how lucky she was that Hunt had taken her side, though as it held true, Dr. Nelson had never gained the support of the staff at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital. He wasn't well-liked, and he was a bit of an ass. Before Derek started his research and was recognized by Washington D.C., they rarely heard Dr. Nelson's name. He'd always been second to Derek. Now, without Derek, he was all they had. Sure, he was a good doctor who published frequently, but as he'd proved himself, he wasn't a risk taker, and sometimes risks needed to be taken.

Meredith ran into Arizona Robbins on her way back to gyno.

"Did you see Amelia?" Meredith asked.

"The pregnant woman whose baby has congenital pulmonary stenosis? Yeah, I just talked to her and explained what we would do after the baby is born. There wasn't much more for me to do now. Gyno will page me when the baby is born," Arizona said and added, "The new gyno attending seems nice. Was Amelia a patient of yours?"

Meredith froze, realizing that Arizona could say something to Callie who could then in turn say something to Derek. Meredith patted her phone in her pocket. Over half the hospital knew Amelia was here, and she hadn't told Derek yet. Amelia wouldn't be happy if word got back to Derek that she was pregnant too. Of course, Meredith was the only one who knew Amelia's real intentions, and she wanted it to stay that way, because she was still determined to convince Amelia to keep the baby.

Arizona's eyes widened. "Amelia Shepherd...she's related to Derek, isn't she? I don't know why I didn't put two and two together."

"Shhh," Meredith whispered. "She's Derek's sister, but please, don't say anything to Callie. Derek doesn't know she's here, and he doesn't know she's pregnant either."

"Okay, then," Arizona's eyes widened. "Family secrets, huh?"

"You can say that," Meredith sighed.

"Don't you think it's a little weird that she would come to Seattle when he's in D.C.?" Arizona asked, and Meredith's face froze. "Right, it's none of my business."

"And don't say anything to Alex about the new gyno attending," Meredith said flatly.

"Huh? Why?" Meredith started to walk off, and Arizona hollered back, "You can't drop a bombshell on me like that and not explain why!"

Meredith stopped and turned around. "She's his ex-wife."

Arizona's jaw dropped. "Oh," she mouthed slowly. "Izzie, right? Gosh, I didn't even recognize her. The last time I saw her…"

"I know." Meredith turned around and proceeded to walk toward the gynecology wing.

She entered the room where Amelia had been, but she wasn't there, but she ran into Izzie. "Izzie, where's Amelia?" she asked with a sigh.

"Oh, I told her she was good to go, and we have an appointment in two weeks. I want to watch her closely," Izzie said.

"All right, so you have no idea where she went?" Meredith asked intensely. Izzie shook her head.

"Look, Mer, I'm sorry I didn't call when I moved back, but I got a new phone and lost all my numbers. I was hoping I'd run into you sooner or later, though I honestly was wondering if you'd moved after all that happened. When I first heard that the hospital had been renamed Grey Sloan Memorial my first thought was that something had happened to you. It was the worst feeling ever, but then Hunt told me...and, I'm so sorry about Lexie, Mer. I knew you two were starting to get closer when I left."

"Yeah," Meredith looked off, unable to make eye contact with Izzie. A moist lump formed in her throat as she tried to hold back tears. It'd been nearly two years since Lexie and Mark had passed, and she still found it difficult to talk about what had happened. The plane crash that had fiendishly taken her sister's life would never be forgotten. It was a moment in her life she would never forget, but it was also one she didn't like to be consciously reminded of.

Flashes of Lexie crossed through Meredith's mind. She remembered the moment she'd learned Lexie was her sister. She remembered how she'd tried to push Lexie away, and then how hard Lexie had tried to get to know her. She studied Izzie. It had been almost five years since she had seen Izzie Stevens, and here she was, seemingly healthy and standing in front of her.

"I'd love to catch up some time," Izzie insisted.

"Me, too. I take it you have a place of your own here in Seattle?" Meredith asked, smiling as she remembered how her former roommate used to do all the cooking. Izzie was quite the bake. Sometimes Meredith missed coming home to fresh baked cookies or bread.

"Yeah, Blake and I live a few miles from here, actually," Izzie said, and then Meredith watched Izzie clasp her hand over her mouth as if she'd said something she hadn't planned on saying.

"Blake? Your boyfriend?" Meredith asked.

"Blake is my son," Izzie whispered, and Meredith noticed Izzie's cheeks blush.

"Your son? How old is he?" Meredith asked, remembering how she had convinced Izzie to freeze some of her eggs before entering cancer treatments. Often times radiology could affect a woman's fertility. That wasn't always the case, though.

"He's four," Izzie said. "Uh, you know, I really should get back to work. I don't want to get fired from my new job already."

"Right. I have a three-year-old daughter, so maybe we could arrange a playdate in the near future," Meredith insisted. "Uh, do you have your phone with you? I can give you my new number." Izzie pulled her phone out of her pocket, and Meredith rattled off her cell phone number as Izzie punched it into her phone. She and Derek had gotten new plans not long ago, when they'd upgraded to iPhones, thus resulting in new phone numbers. So wouldn't have been able to call her anyway, if she'd tried.

"Awesome. I'll shoot you a text. Well, I gotta get back to work…" And Izzie disappeared.

As Izzie disappeared, Meredith was mentally doing the math. She'd last seen Izzie almost five years ago. Her son is four years old. Of course, no one knew where Izzie had gone after she was fired. Meredith knew that it hadn't ended well for Alex and Izzie. Izzie had tried to reconcile with him, but he'd told her that he didn't deserve to be treated like she had treated him. After all, she had just disappeared without an explanation. Meredith didn't blame Alex for ending his marriage.

The last time Meredith saw Izzie was when she'd told her that she could have her job back. She'd agreed to allow Derek to turn Richard in if Izzie could have her job back. In the end, their deal was for nothing, because Izzie didn't want her job back. She wanted a new life, after breaking it off with Alex, so she'd left. Derek turned Richard in, and then took over as chief. April Kepner had, however, benefited from Derek's stepping up as chief, because she, too, had lost her job during the merger, and had regained it when Derek took over as chief.

It was all ancient history now. Derek stepped down as chief after the shooting, and life went on.

But what do you do when a piece of your past returns? It felt just like yesterday that Izzie had left. Although they were both older and wiser now, Izzie was still Izzie. Meredith knew Alex had been through so much in the past year, and she did worry about him. She'd been so busy with her own work and family that she hadn't been able to be there for him. Jo had come to her for advice on a few occasions, and she'd willingly offered it to her. Meredith liked Jo. She was different, but Jo and Alex seemed like such a nice fit. Their crazy suited each other, plus they were a cute couple.

As Meredith drowned in her thoughts, searching the hospital for her stray sister-in-law, she ran into Alex. She bit her lip. "Alex!" she gasped.

"Hey, Mer," Alex said, not looking up from his iPad.

"Hey, uh, have you seen Amelia? You know, Derek's sister, the one I was with this morning?"

"Oh, the doctor you told could have privileges in the hospital without Hunt's permission? Nope." Alex continued walking, and Meredith hustled after him. Alex turned around. "Can I help you with something?"

"I just thought we could catch up a little. We've both been so busy and haven't had a chance to talk lately," Meredith said, following behind Alex, who continued to focus on his iPad.

"Um, okay?"

"How are things with you and Jo?" Meredith asked, despite Alex's apparent disinterest in the conversation.

"Fine," Alex said. He stopped, looked up from his iPad, and raised an eyebrow at Meredith. "Why are you asking? Did Jo say something?"

"No, she didn't," Meredith said quickly. "Why would she say something? Is there something to tell?"

"Not that I'm aware of, but you never know with you damn women," Alex said. "You women think too much."

Meredith laughed. "It's part of the female brain. We're wired to overthink. So, you and Jo are good?"

"That's what I said," Alex said.

"Do you love her?"

Alex froze and widened his eyes. "Why are you asking me all these questions about Jo?"

"Oh, I just wondering, considering I was the one who told you her crazy fit yours. I'd like to take credit for planting the bug in your head." Meredith winked.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, Mer," Alex laughed. "But yeah, we're good. You were right. Her crazy does fit my crazy. We're like a match made in Heaven, if you believe in all that Heaven crap. She's just different." Alex paused and added, "A good different."

"That's good." Meredith smirked as she put her hands on her hips. "I'm happy for you. Really, I am." She wanted to tell Alex about Izzie, but she bit her tongue. "Well, I should go find Amelia. Catch up later?" She ran toward the stairs. She'd just realized where Amelia was, and she didn't know why it hadn't hit her sooner.

"I'd say let's meet at Joe's later, but you have diapers to change!" Alex called after her, and Meredith sighed. Sometimes she missed pieces of her old life; going to Joe's after her shift ended just to have a few drinks with her friends. Times had changed, but there wasn't a moment she would trade her life now for back then. Her kids were her world, and that's all that mattered.

She couldn't stop thinking about Izzie and the information she'd learned today. What if Blake was Alex's son? Meredith hadn't even met the kid yet, though part of her wanted to run down to the daycare right now to scope the room for a mini-Alex.

_The kid might not even be his_, Meredith thought and partially hoped. Alex seemed happy now, and despite all the drama he'd gone through with his father this year, he was doing well. Jo did seem good for him, and Meredith would hate to see that relationship tear apart because Izzie was back and was about to drop the "_Meet your son you never knew you had"_ bombshell on him. Poor Alex.


	7. Chapter 7

Meredith wasn't surprised when her theory of Amelia's whereabouts checked out. She found Amelia in Stacy Meyer's hospital room.

"Amelia!" Meredith cried, entering the room. "I've been looking everywhere for you."

"I'm right here," Amelia said. "Meredith, can I have a word with you outside?" She gestured for Meredith to follow her out of the patient's room. Meredith sensed the grim expression on Amelia's face. "I just ran another CT," Amelia whispered. "The tumor - it's grown since this morning. If I don't get in there soon, she doesn't have a chance."

"Well, lucky for you, it was Hunt who paged me, and he told Nelson to take a hike. He wants you to be as aggressive as possible with your treatment for Stacy," Meredith informed Amelia.

"That's great. Now, book me an O.R.," Amelia said.

"You're sure that you can do this?" Meredith asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Of course I'm sure. I'm a neurosurgeon. It's what I do best. I've had a lot of success with this procedure. I've done more complicated procedures when I was high," Amelia rolled her eyes and noticed Meredith didn't find her comment funny. "Okay, I shouldn't joke about that."

"No, no you shouldn't. I mean, given the news you've just received, are you sure you can do this?" Meredith asked, looking at Amelia's belly.

"I'm sure," Amelia said confidently.

"I'm just saying, because Derek and I did a similar procedure, and it was at least an eight hour surgery," Meredith told her.

"You want in?" Amelia asked, raising an eyebrow.

Meredith clenched her fists together. It felt like eons since she'd had her hands on a good brain tumor, after all, she'd given up neuro two years ago when Derek decided he couldn't trust her at work, and she had decided that the only way they could stay together was if they didn't work together. Relationships were full of sacrifices.

As much as she loved her kids, she knew she made quite a few sacrifices for them. She'd forgotten all the cool surgeries happen at night. Sometimes she missed being a resident, trolling the halls of the hospital late at night or early in the morning for rare surgeries. That part of her life was long over.

"I have to get the kids home," Meredith replied.

"All right then. Your loss," Amelia sighed.

Meredith sent a text to book the O.R. for Amelia, and the same time, she witnessed Leah Murphy passing by. "Hey, Murphy!" Meredith called after the second-year resident. Murphy turned around.

"Yes, Dr. Grey?"

"Dr. Murphy, meet Dr. Amelia Shepherd. She's about to perform an inoperable surgery and is in need of someone to scrub in. You in?"

"Wait, if it's inoperable…" Leah hesitated, then her eyes widened. "I mean, yes, of course I'm in."

"There you go." Meredith patted Amelia's shoulder. "Good luck." She handed over the patient's file to Amelia and then left the neurosurgeon and her new resident alone.

Meredith's thoughts continued to circle back to Alex and Izzie. She knew that if she went down to the daycare now, Zola and Bailey would think it was time to go home. It was three o'clock. Technically, Meredith knew that she could clock out now if she wanted. Or, she could go find a new patient. She hadn't been paged, so that meant no one was critical condition. The residents and interns were generally the first to see the new patients, and then they paged an attending if it was critical. She hadn't been paged. No one was critical. Still, she knew that if she went down to the E.R. now, someone would see her and pull her into a case, and then she could end up being at the hospital later than she initially planned. If she could help it, Meredith tried to avoid seeing new patients after two. She scheduled all her surgeries early in the morning. In an ideal world, she would take the kids home every day at three o'clock. It wasn't an ideal world, though. No matter how hard she tried to get out of the hospital by early afternoon or evening, something always came up.

She needed to tell someone about Izzie's son, and Derek wasn't available. It was three o'clock in Seattle, which meant it was six o'clock in D.C. She imagined Derek was eating dinner and just hadn't had the time to call her back. She pulled out her phone and called Derek, but instead, she received got his voicemail.

_Cristina_, Meredith thought. She hadn't realized how much she missed having Cristina around to bounce her feelings and thoughts off. She had Derek now, but talking to Derek wasn't the same as talking to Cristina. Sometimes Derek just looked bored when she went on her rants. Cristina never seemed bored with her rants. If she was, she didn't show it. Meredith missed being able to tell Cristina everything, and Cristina telling her everything. Even though half the time they weren't listening to each other, it was nice to be able to vent.

She did something she hadn't done in a while. She texted Cristina. _Meet me in 201. _Room 201 happened to be a supply closet.

Meredith opened the supply closet and waited. She knew Cristina would come. She always responded to her pages.

Sure enough, Cristina entered the closet three minutes later with shock written on her face. "I have to say, Mer, it's been a while since you've paged me to a supply closet."

"Yeah, well, Derek's out of town and…"

"Oh, so in other words, you need to talk to someone and I'm your last resort. Well, Izzie's back. Why don't you go talk to her?" Cristina turned around and Meredith grabbed Cristina's shoulder.

"Cristina," Meredith hissed. "You're not my last resort. I-I miss you."

"You miss me?" Cristina asked, half laughing.

"Of course I miss you. You're my best friend. We used to tell each other everything, and now we don't."

"Now you know how I feel," Cristina said slowly, turning back around and looking into Meredith's blue eyes. "You have McDreamy, and I have nada. Zilch. McDreamy's out of town, so you feel lonely. That's the only reason you're paging me now."

"It doesn't have to be like this," Meredith said. "I know we've both said things we didn't mean, and things are different now. But that doesn't mean we can't still be friends, because after all this, I still consider you my best friend. You're my person…that is, if you want to be."

Cristna looked down and nodded. "And I still consider you mine. You'll always be my person, but I'm not yours, Mer. Derek is, and you know it. Gosh, Mer, what is it? Why did you page me here?"

"It's Izzie," Meredith said carefully, trying to digest what Cristina had said. _You'll always be my person, but I'm not yours. Derek is. _She swallowed, realizing that Cristina was right. But she still cared deeply about Cristina, despite all that had happened.

"Yeah, she's back. I know. I was there, remember?"

"Did you know she has a son?" Meredith asked. She just wanted her Cristina back. The Cristina she could tell everything to. The Cristina she gossiped with. All was fun and games when they were being mean and gossiping about other people. It wasn't fun when they were at each other's throats, though.

"What?" Cristina's mouth formed a circle. "Well, that's awesome. That makes me the only one from our intern class who's not dead or doesn't have a kid...well, except Alex, but he has Jo...wait...how old you say her kid is?"

"He's four, Cristina," Meredith said softly, unsure why Cristina cared if she was the only one from their intern class who didn't have a kid. She'd been so adamant about not having kids.

"Oh, crap," Cristina's eyes widened. "Does Alex know?" Meredith shook her head. "Someone has to tell him."

"Cristina, no!" Meredith gasped. "We don't even know if it's his."

"Well, let's march down to that daycare right now and see if we can spot a miniature Alex roaming around," Cristina rolled her eyes. "If Alex has a kid, he has a right to know."

"I know," Meredith said. "But we can't say anything. It's not our place. It's Izzie's, and if the kid is his, then she'll tell him eventually. Like I said, it might not even be his."

"He's four years old, Mer," Cristina said. "Izzie wasn't a ho like you and I. Alex and," Cristina's nose scrunched up, "George were the only guys she slept with during the whole time we knew her. I mean, unless you count Denny's ghost. Hey, maybe Denny's ghost is the kid's dad."

Meredith burst into laughter. "Oh, Cristina, I've missed you." She wrapped her arm around Cristina's shoulder.

"So, are we going to go look or what?" Cristina asked.

"I was going to try to take the kids home early today anyway," Meredith admitted, and she and Cristina left the supply closet and began heading toward the daycare. As they walked down the stairs, they ran into April.

"Meredith, where have you _been_? I've been paging you all day, and you haven't responded. Bailey is not happy with you right now," Kepner shook her head.

Meredith look down at her phone. She didn't have any missed calls. "I haven't gotten any of your messages. See?" She showed Kepner her phone.

"Well, that's just weird!" April shrieked. "Stupid technology."

"You're telling me. You might want to get your phone looked at, because Hunt had no problem paging me today," Meredith insisted.

"Well, do you have a moment?" April asked.

"No, she doesn't. She's busy," Cristina said, taking Meredith's hand and pulling her down the stairs.

"I see you two are buddy-buddy again!" April hollered after Cristina and Meredith as the two laughed and ran away from Kepner.

"Maybe I should have helped her?" Meredith insisted once they were out of Kepner's ear range.

"Nah, she was probably lying about paging you anyway. She just wanted attention. It is Kepner, after all," Cristina said.

"Hey, she's not _that _bad. And she did have us as bridesmaids at her wedding," Meredith pointed out.

"Don't remind me of that," Cristina sighed. It really wasn't a pleasant memory, especially since it had ended in disaster - with Jackson confessing his love to April in the middle of the ceremony. He would soon regret that decision, when April ran down the aisle in tears, then called off the wedding. All the money her parents had put into her wedding went to waste, and Meredith did sympathize for Matthew and Stephanie. Meredith was impressed with how maturely Stephanie had handled it, though. It was almost like she'd seen it coming.

Everyone knew that Jackson and April were meant to be, but April was livid with Jackson after what he did. She said that he should have told her sooner-much sooner, because now she was humiliated. Over all, April had a good conscious. She always did mean well, and she hadn't wanted to hurt Matthew. Not like that.

Recently, Meredith had witnessed April and Jackson talking in the E.R. They were pretty close to each other physically, so she sensed April was on the path to forgiving Jackson. Meredith had a feeling that after what happened last time, though, April wouldn't ask her and Cristina to be her bridesmaids at her next wedding. Though, her sisters were certainly characters themselves. Meredith couldn't blame April for wanting to fire them.

They'd only been standing outside the daycare window for a few minutes when Cristina gasped, "It's him!" She pointed at a little boy who was playing with Sofia and Zola. He had light brown hair and brown eyes. Meredith hadn't noticed the boy before, so she was surprised to see that he was playing with her daughter. He was about the same height as Zola as well. The boy did bear an uncanny resemblance to Alex, though it was possible she was imagining it.

"You're sure?" Meredith whispered.

"That kid has Alex written all over him," Cristina said flatly. "I have to tell him."

"No!" Meredith gasped. "Cristina, you cannot tell him. He doesn't even know Izzie's back." Meredith's phone started vibrating in her pocket. The caller I.D. read _Derek Shepherd. _"It's Derek. I have to take this."

"Okay, whatever. I won't tell him," Cristina said, disappearing as Meredith answered her phone.

"Hey, Derek," Meredith said.

"Mer, I'm sorry I didn't call you back sooner. I meant to, but you'll never guess who I had dinner with tonight."

"The president?" Meredith asked.

"Close. The vice president," Derek answered.

"Wow. Congratulations. I'm so jealous," Meredith laughed, though really she wasn't. Politicians were all compulsive liars, and truth be told, she had no interest in meeting anyone in the White House.

"I'm sensing sarcasm. Anyway, what's up? How are the kids?" Derek asked.

"I'm looking at them right now, and they seem fine. It looks like Zola and Sofia have made a new friend," Meredith said, deciding she would tell him about Izzie, but she wouldn't tell him _how _she'd found out Izzie was back.

"Oh?"

"Derek, Izzie's back," Meredith whispered, looking around, hoping Alex wasn't nearby.

"What?"

"She's an attending in gynecology now. I, uh, ran into her today," Meredith said, reluctant to tell Derek the real reason she'd crossed paths with Izzie Stevens today.

"Wait, what were you doing over in gynecology?" Derek asked. "Meredith, are you trying to tell me something?"

She gasped, not expecting that response from her husband. Derek was the second person today to ask if she was pregnant. "No!" she cried. "No, no. Absolutely not. I was just passing by and ran into her is all." It was only a minor fib.

"Oh." She felt as though she was sensing _disappointment _in his voice.

"Wait, are you trying to tell me you want another baby?" Meredith asked, alarmed.

"It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world," Derek said. "And we used to joke about having a large family."

"Says the man who gets to have dinner with the President of the United States while his wife gives up her research and stays home with the kids," Meredith replied dryly.

"Okay, okay. I get it. We do have our hands full right now, though I'll be home tomorrow, and it's not like I'm going to be traveling that often. I know you're busy, and I'll try to make it up to you. Okay? I love you, Meredith."

"And I love you," Meredith said. "But we're not making more babies right now."

"Well, of course we're not. I'm on the other side of the country," Derek laughed.

"Derek Christopher Shepherd," Meredith scolded. She felt like she was scolding one of the kids. She almost never used his full name.

"Okay, okay. No more babies, for now," Derek sighed with disappointment.

"Why do you sound so disappointed?" Meredith asked. "I mean, it's a miracle that I even got pregnant in the first place. The odds of it happening again have to be like next to zero."

"I wouldn't say that," Derek laughed. "Maybe I just have magic swimmers."

"Derek!" Meredith gasped and then laughed.

"Meredith, if you were pregnant again, I would be willing to give up my career and stay home with the kids," Derek said. "I've done wonderful things already. Your career is just beginning."

"Yeah, and I've heard that before, and you're in Washington D.C., and I'm here. How are you going to tell the President of the United States that you're done?" Meredith asked. "It's like Owen told you. You don't say no to the president."

"Do you think I like being here?" Derek asked. "I would much rather be there with you, Zola, and Bailey. I really don't want to fight with you about it anymore."

She'd given Derek an earful when she'd first heard about the president's offer. She'd told him that he had to say no. He couldn't take it. Their schedule had been working out so well. Derek was spending most of his time with his research, and she was able to start her own research. Of course, shit hit the fan when Cristina started using the 3D printer for her own patient and was successful, while Meredith ceased to make much progress. The last year felt like such a waste, and Meredith didn't want to waste anymore time. She felt like she only had a few years left to have a break-through of some type, before the current residents became attendings and started having their major medical breakthroughs, overshadowing hers. Derek had already published a study. He'd already seen success. That's why the president was interested in him in the first place. If she didn't make progress now, she was just screwed.

One thing was for certain, she couldn't afford another baby.

"I miss you," she told Derek.

"I'll see you tomorrow, and we'll talk tonight, right? I can't wait to see Zo and Bailey again. Last night was so much fun."

"Yeah, of course we can talk tonight," Meredith said, then she remembered Amelia. Amelia would probably be in surgery until late that night, so Meredith wasn't sure if Amelia planned on coming to the house or not. "There's one more thing I should tell you, Derek."

"What's that?"

"Your sister is in Seattle."


	8. Chapter 8

There was a deafening silence. Meredith looked through the window at her daughter, who hadn't noticed that her mother was standing outside the door. She scanned the room for her who son, who she found on the other side of the room snuggling a teddy bear. Another dark skinned boy was sitting next to him; Meredith knew he was the son of a scrub nurse. She believed his name was Nathaniel.

"Which one?" Derek finally asked; his voice raspy. Meredith knew that Derek hated when his sisters showed up, particularly when they showed up unannounced. "Did you forget I have a pack of sisters?"

"It's Amelia," Meredith said blandly, as if it were no big deal.

"Okay?" Derek's voice hinted obvious confusion. "Why? What's she doing in Seattle?"

Meredith knew that was coming as well, and she knew she couldn't lie to her husband, so she prepared to tell him the truth, managing to leave out to leave out the detail about the baby.

"She's here to help you," Meredith said.

"What?"

"She heard about your work with the president and thought we could use some help in Seattle. I guess she took a leave of absence from her job in L.A. and is going to ask Hunt for temporary position here, and I'm sure he won't decline. With your research and traveling now, Dr. Nelson is overbooked."

"Tell her to go home." Derek's voice rose. "Tell her to go home _now_."

"Oh, come on, Derek. She's just trying to help," Meredith insisted.

"I don't care if she's just trying to help. She has her own life to worry about. Trust me, Mer, we really don't want her butting into ours," Derek said harshly.

"I have to say, she was really good with our son this morning. I was actually able to take a decent length shower this morning," Meredith admitted.

"Wait? She was at the house this morning? When did she arrive?" Meredith didn't respond and Derek continued, "She was there last night, wasn't she? That's why you were acting weird. _Shit_." He'd just realized that she had overheard his dirty talk.

"Yes, Derek," Meredith sighed. "She was there last night." She looked through the window and noticed that Zola was waving at her. "Look, Derek. I have to go. I want to get the kids home at a decent time today."

"We're not done talking about this," Derek growled, and Meredith ended the call. She knew he was right. They definitely weren't done talking about Amelia. In fact, their conversation had just begun.

She entered the daycare and Zola ran toward her. "Mama!" she exclaimed, wrapping her arms around Meredith. "Time to go home?"

"Yes, baby girl," she said to the three-year-old. "It's time to go home." Meredith's eyes shifted toward Sofia and the little boy who was sitting next to her.

"Mama, this is Blake," Zola said, introducing Meredith to her new friend. _Blake_, Meredith repeated in her head, remembering that Izzie had said that she and Blake didn't live far from the hospital. Cristina had been spot on.

Meredith smiled, studying Blake. "It's nice to meet you, Blake."

"Your mommy's _very_ pretty," Blake said, rather so charmingly, to Zola. Meredith blushed slightly and thought, _This kid is so Alex_. "But why she gots light skin like me and you gots dark skin?"

"'Cause my mama and daddy adopted me!" Zola chimed. "'Cause they love me." Meredith and Derek knew it was very important for Zola to understand that even though she was adopted, and Bailey was their biological child, that they loved her very much, and that's why they adopted her. She understood that she hadn't come from Meredith's tummy, and they had specifically chosen her because she was special.

"That's right, Zozo," Meredith smiled, giving her little girl a hug. "Now, let's get ready to go home. I'm going to go get your brother, okay?"

Before picking up Bailey, she made a dash for the attendings' lounge to change out of her scrubs.

Bailey was elated to see his mother so early. The little boy's deep blue eyes lit up when he saw his mother walking toward him. Once she picked up Bailey and gathered the diaper bag, she returned to find Zola playing with Sofia and Blake again. When she saw her mother and brother, she dropped the toys in her hand and ran over to Meredith and Bailey. "I ready to go, Mama!"

"Good girl," Meredith smiled. "Bye, Sofia and Blake." She waved at her daughter's friends.

Sofia timidly looked away, but Blake waved. "Bye, Zoey!"

"See you 'morrow, Blakey!" Zola waved back. _Aw, they're so cute, _Meredith thought, glad that Izzie's son and her daughter were already hitting it off, though she was worried about Alex. There was no easy way for him to find out about Blake, and after meeting the kid, Meredith was ninety-nine percent confident he was Alex's son. All she had to do was get Izzie to admit it.

Meredith managed to hold Zola's hand and carry Bailey in the other arm, all while having a heavy diaper bag weighing her down. As she approached the hospital exit, she heard a familiar voice calling her name.

"Meredith Grey!"

Her heart sunk as she turned around to see Dr. Miranda Bailey coming toward her. Meredith remembered her run-in with Kepner earlier. _Dr. Bailey is not happy with you right now_, and she could sense that from Miranda Bailey's face right now. Her expression was stiff and her eyebrows narrow as the short woman walked toward her.

"Dr. Bailey," Meredith hesitantly greeted her fellow attending and mentor.

"Where have you been all day? Kepner told me she paged you, but you never responded," Miranda Bailey said. "I have a twenty-two-year-old patient who specifically requested _you _or Derek Shepherd; she says she was your patient about seven years ago. She has a history of seizures; I removed her appendix today, though obviously you weren't available to answer your pages."

"Is her name Katie?" Meredith lifted a brow, remembering her first patient. "And I never _got _these pages. I swear. Look at my phone if you don't believe me. And if it was so dire, why didn't _you _page me?"

"Because I was in surgery!" Bailey snapped. "And yes, Katie Bryce. She said she was a former pageant competitor. Wasn't she your first patient? The name sounds familiar."

"Why does she want me anyway? She was a pain in the ass. She _hated _me and gave me hell," Meredith rolled her eyes. "She made me wish I'd never become a doctor in the first place, and on top of it all, she was my first patient."

"Maybe she wants to apologize? I don't know, but she's been asking for you all day. Her room is 320, if you give a rat's ass," Dr. Bailey said sharply.

Meredith looked down at her little girl, who tugged at her hand. "Can we go home, Mama?" the little girl whimpered.

Meredith sighed. "We will soon, baby, but first we're going to go visit someone, okay?" Zola stuck her lip out, pouting. She dragged Zola to the elevator. The strain from the baby and the diaper bag was causing her shoulder to ache. She was wishing now that Bailey could walk on his own too. _It's only a matter of time, _Meredith thought, looking down at her little boy, who rested his head against his mother's shoulder. Bailey was getting so big. It was hard to believe that he was already ten months old. Soon, he would be walking and talking all the time. It wouldn't be long before he was out of diapers and arguing with his sister. She had her hands full and couldn't imagine starting all over with a new baby. Small babies required so much attention; attention she definitely wasn't prepared for when Bailey was born. After all, Zola was already almost a year old when they'd adopted her. Taking care of a newborn and a one-year-old were complete different tasks. She was just grateful that Bailey slept through the night on most nights now. She couldn't imagine going back to waking up every couple hours.

She entered Katie's room with the kids, and the first thing she did was set the diaper bag down in the chair. Katie was using her iPad when Meredith entered.

"Dr. Grey?" Katie asked, setting her iPad down. "Is that you?"

"That's me," Meredith said. She was wearing her street clothes, so she didn't look like a doctor. "Well, Katie, you've grown up. Still doing pageants?"

Katie shook her head. "Nope. I teach dance now. Are these your children?"

Meredith nodded. "This is Zola," she looked down at her three-year-old and then looked at her son. "And my son, Bailey."

"You named your son after Dr. Bailey?" Katie laughed.

"She saved my life," Meredith replied quickly.

"Ah, then that makes two of us who named our children after the doctors who saved our lives," Katie smiled gently, grabbing her iPad again. She turned the iPad toward Meredith and a photo of a blonde haired toddler with bright, shining blue eyes appeared on the screen. "This is my daughter. Her name is Meredith. She's eighteen months old now."

Meredith's heart stopped for a moment as she looked at the sweet angel face. She stared in disbelief. After all, she hadn't actually saved Katie's life. Derek had. She had just watched. It was the first surgery she'd ever scrubbed in on. It was such a high, but she hadn't been the one to save Katie's life.

She and Cristina had worked together to determine what was actually wrong with Katie. Cristina had been so desperate to get in on that surgery. Hell, Meredith hadn't even wanted in on it. She wanted to avoid Derek then, after all she'd just found out that she'd slept with her boss. It was highly inappropriate, and then he continued to try to pursue her, even after finding out she was his intern.

All of that seemed like a million years ago now.

"She's beautiful," Meredith smiled. "Just like her mother."

Katie blushed. "Look, I know I wasn't the easiest patient. You must have hated me."

Meredith laughed. "I don't know if hate is the right word, but you definitely made me question my decision to become a doctor."

"Right, well, I was a bit of an unruly teen. I grew up, though," Katie said.

"I'm glad to hear that," Meredith said, chuckling lightly.

"I knew you and Dr. Shepherd would end up together. He was totally into you back then," Katie said suddenly, and Meredith raised an eyebrow, wondering if Dr. Bailey had said something about her and Derek, then Katie pointed to Bailey. "I'd recognize your son's eyes anywhere."

Meredith looked at her son's soft baby face. Derek always talked about how he looked so much like her, but he did have his father's eyes. His thin, wavy blond hair was all her, though. If he was lucky, his hair would darken and thicken like his father's when he grew older.

"Do you like cookies?" Zola asked suddenly, innocently peering toward Katie.

Katie laughed. "I love cookies."

"Do you want one?" Zola asked, reaching her hand in her pocket and, to Meredith's shock, she pulled out crumbs of a chocolate chip cookie. She handed the cookie crumbs to Katie. "They're really good."

"Zola, sweetie, where did those cookies come from?" Meredith asked, widening her eyes.

"Snack time," Zola answered. "I keeped them for later." Meredith noticed Katie giggling, and although she had to admit Zola sounded incredibly adorable, she wasn't amused by the melted chocolate mess.

Meredith scowled as Zola pulled out more of the cookie crumbs and stuffed them in her own mouth. "I'm so sorry," Meredith apologized as she saw the melted chocolate that covered her daughter's hand. She set her son on the floor and unzipped the diaper bag to pull out some baby wipes. She handed a wipe to Katie, then she wiped Zola's hand.

She was so preoccupied with Zola that she didn't notice her son had stood up. When she looked back toward Bailey, she saw Bailey holding onto a chair by himself. "Bailey!" she gasped, letting go of Zola and she rushed toward her son and picked him up. She released a sigh of relief. "Your daddy would _kill _me if you took your first steps before he got home."

Bailey babbled. "Da-da!"

Meredith looked back to Zola, who had taken out more crumbs from her pocket to eat. The chocolate was all over her face. "Oh, Zo." Meredith murmured. "We better get going." She turned toward Katie. "It was nice seeing you again."

"It was nice seeing you, too," Katie waved kindly as Meredith and the kids left the room.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Thank you all for the wonderful feedback. This chapter is intended to be loaded with cuteness. I know you're all waiting for Derek to return. His plane leaves D.C. in chapter 13. Although there are some very **_**interesting **_**MerDer scenes in the upcoming chapters while Derek is still in D.C.**

* * *

Meredith Grey breathed a huge sigh of relief when she was able to get out of the hospital without further confrontation. The first thing she did when she got home was give Zola a bath while Bailey played in his playpen in the living room. As crazy as it sounded, she was already missing Amelia. She hated leaving her ten-month-old son unsupervised, but she knew she needed to tend to his sister. He was in the company of stuffed animals in his playpen.

"Zola, darling, now you're not going to stuff the cookies from daycare into your pocket again, are you?" Meredith asked her little girl as she scrubbed the chocolate off Zola's face. She had managed to get the melted chocolate everywhere.

"No, Mama," Zola said softly. She wiggled her nose.

"And why not?"

"Because they're messy," Zola replied simply. Meredith grabbed a towel and wrapped it around Zola as she pulled her out of the tub. She took Zola's little bathrobe that hung behind the door and helped Zola put it on. Then, she took Zola to her bedroom.

"Okay, Zo. Do you want to wear your purple sparkly PJs or your pink fairy PJs?" she asked Zola as she opened up the little girl's closet.. Meredith had recently read an article about how important it was for children Zola's ages to be given choices. The article talked about how it was important not to offer limitless option.

"I wanna wear butterfly costume," Zola said, pointing to the costume hanging in the back of the closet. It was the costume she wore for Halloween, which Meredith was certain was too small for her now. Zola had certainly grown since October.

"Sweetie, it isn't Halloween, and you're too big for that costume now," Meredith explained.

"I wanna wear purple butterfly costume!" Zola exclaimed, sticking her lip out in a pout.

"But it's too small for you, sweetheart," Meredith said. "And it isn't Halloween."

Zola continued to pout. She crossed her arms and started to cry, and finally Meredith released a sigh. "Okay, you can wear it." She only said because she knew that once Zola saw the outfit was too small for her, she would be forced to change. She took the costume off its hanger and started to help Zola into the costume, which, as Meredith had predicted, was much too tight for Zola to fit in comfortably. "See, Zo?"

"It's too tight." Zola curled her lip rather preciously.

"But your PJs aren't. Do you want to wear pink or purple?"

"Purple," Zola said, and Meredith wasn't surprised. Purple was Zola's favorite color.

Just as she started to help Zola out of the tight costume, she heard her cell phone's text chime go off. Shortly after, she heard Bailey scream. She helped Zola put on her shirt quickly, and handed Zola her pajama pants. "Do you think you can put on your pants, sweetie?"

Zola nodded as she took the pants from her mother's arms, and Meredith ran out of the room. "Oh, Bailey," she said soothingly, picking up the little boy from his crib. "Did Mommy's phone scare you?" She looked into his wet eyes. His tears slowed as his mother rubbed his back. In the meantime, she reached over and picked up her phone off the end table. _New Text Message_, she read the notification and slid her finger over the lock screen to read the text.

_It's Izzie. Just got off work. Want to catch up? _

She sighed. Rather than texting Izzie back, she hit _Call_. Meredith preferred talking on the phone over texting any day. It certainly faster, and Meredith preferred to be able to hear the other person's tone. It was so easy to misread a person's true intentions in a text, because you couldn't hear the tone of their voice. Specifically, it was easy to miss sarcasm.

The phone rang three times before Izzie's picked up. "Mer?"

"Hey, Iz," Meredith said. "So, you want to catch up?"

"Yeah, I mean, why not? I can come over to your house. You know, I kind of missing living with you sometimes. Life was, even though I didn't realize think so at the time, so simple then," Izzie said.

"Well, you do know I don't live in my old house anymore, right?"

"What? Seriously?" Izzie gasped. "Derek built you that dream house, didn't he?"

"He did," Meredith said. "It's not far from where his trailer was, actually, since it's on the same land. You can actually see the house from the trailer. Owen lives there now." Meredith bit her lip. She would eventually tell Izzie that Alex lived in her old house.

"Oh, well. I remember how to get there, I think, so I could come out. I can't wait to meet your daughter! I bet she's gorgeous."

"Oh, she is," Meredith assured. "And, yeah, that's fine with me. Oh, I have a son as well."

"Wow, Mer. You and McDreamy have been busy! Does he have McDreamy hair?"

Meredith chuckled lightly. "Actually, unfortunately for him, he looks more like me. He has Derek's eyes, though. But he's only ten months old, so there's still hope for him." Meredith looked at the little guy in her arms, who was now sucking on his thumb. He was precious.

"I bet he's precious. Wow, things really have changed around here since I left…" Izzie trailed. "Well, I'll see you in a little bit."

Izzie hung up, and Meredith cradled Bailey. "That was a really old friend of your mommy's, Bailey," Meredith explained in higher pitched, child-like voice to her son. "She's coming over soon. I'm sure you'll love her. But first, let's go check on your sister." She went into Zola's room, expecting to see her daughter fully dressed in her purple pajamas, but instead, to her surprise, she found Zola wearing her purple tutu. Zola had taken a few dance lessons last fall, which she'd absolutely loved, but it had become too much for her and Derek to get Zola to the lessons, so they hadn't been able to register her for the spring session. Zola was really disappointed, but they'd told her that perhaps she could take them over the summer.

"Lookie me, Mommy. I'm a ballewina!" Zola exclaimed; she put her hands above head and twirled around.

Meredith couldn't help but chuckle. "Why, yes you are, Zozo."

"I like dancing!" Zola announced as she continued to dance around. She was adorable and Meredith took a seat on Zola's big girl bed. She had recently graduated into a twin bed. Meredith let out a sigh; her little girl was growing up so fast. It wouldn't be long before she was in school, and the rest would be history. She knew that these were the moments she would cherish forever, and she was grateful to be with Zola.

"You're a great dancer," Meredith told her daughter. "But you have to get dressed. Do you remember your friend Blake from daycare?"

"Yes!" Zola nodded.

"Well, as it turns out, his mommy and I are old friends, and she's on her way over right now, and she's bringing Blake with her. You're going to get to play with him for a little while."

"Yay!" Zola clapped her hands cheerfully. She stripped off her tutu and started to help herself into her purple pajamas pants. Meredith was tempted to offer to help, but she held back. She knew it was time that Zola learned to dress herself. After all, she had managed to get into her tutu by herself.

Bailey squirmed in her arms, so she set him down on the floor. He crawled over to his sister's dollhouse. Meredith watched him closely, to make sure he didn't put anything in his mouth. When Zola was finished getting dressed - which she did all by herself - she joined Bailey. She wrapped her arms around Bailey and Meredith smiled. She still had her phone in her hand, so she started taking pictures. She'd captured the perfect moment, with Zola hugging Bailey in front of the dollhouse. Both were looking straight at the camera. Meredith decided it was the perfect photo to send to Instagram.

She loaded the app. She'd had Instagram for several months now, but she didn't use it often. She'd posted a few pictures of the kids and of her and Derek. When she opened the app, she scrolled down and saw that Derek had posted a few photos. Meredith had recently introduced him to the app as well, when he got his new phone. He thought it was cool that you could adjust the lighting of the photos. She saw his photo of the White House, and then next he had posted a selfie of Callie and him with the caption "Off to meet the president." The photo had been posted yesterday. She noticed how Callie's and Derek's eyes were both glowing. They looked so happy, and looking at the photo just caused Meredith to miss Derek more. _He must not be too happy, or he wouldn't be coming home early, _Meredith thought, trying not to be too jealous of Callie. She knew that Callie and Derek were just friends.

She posted the photo, and after it uploaded successfully, she accidentally clicked on the _News _tab and was surprised when she saw that Derek had liked a few photos. Her eyes widened when she saw whose photos they were: _AddieAdrianne_. Addison. She clicked on the first photo that Derek had liked and saw a photo of Addison, snuggling a toddler. It was the first picture Meredith had seen of Addison's adopted son. She had to admit the picture was indeed adorable. The next picture was a picture of a cat; Meredith imagined it was Addison's. However, it was the third photo that bothered her. It was a picture of Addison...alone. A selfie. Meredith's heart race. _He loves me, _she told herself. _He's with me_. Why did this even bother her?

"Mommy, come play with us." Zola said. "Let's play doctor." She grabbed her toy doctor set from under and pulled out her plastic stethoscope and turned to down Bailey. "Take deep breath, Bailey. I gonna check your heart." Meredith smiled as she slid off the bed and sat on the floor. She noticed Zola was placing chest piece on Zola's stomach. Zola looked at Meredith. "Mommy, I can't hear his heart. I think he dead." Zola's eyes widened. Meredith chuckled.

"Zo, that's not where his heart is. Let me show you," she said, and she moved the chest piece over his heart. "Can you hear it now?"

Zola's widened. "I hear it! He's ALIVE!" The little girl's face lit up. Then the doorbell rang. "Blakey here?" Zola smiled and set the stethoscope down. she ran out of the room. Meredith quickly picked up Bailey and followed her daughter to front door. Through the window, she could see Izzie holding Blake's hand. Blake was wearing a black leather jacket.

Meredith unlocked the door - she always kept it locked when she was home alone - and greeted Izzie and Blake. "Hey, Iz." She smiled warmly, and Zola waved at Blake.

"Hey, Mer," Izzie smiled.

"Hi, Blakey!" Zola smiled happily, spreading her arms and giving Blake a big hug.

"Zoey!" Blake exclaimed.

"Wait, they've already met?" Izzie asked, raising an eyebrow.

"They were playing when I picked Zola up from daycare. Come on in." Meredith motioned for Izzie and Blake to come in the house."Zola, this is Izzie. Blake's mom. She's one of my old friends," Meredith told Zola. Zola twirled her hair and timidly looked at Izzie. "She's not usually this quiet," she told Izzie, and Izzie laughed.

"Wow, what a nice house," Izzie said as she entered the house. "I love the wood floors."

"Let's go play!" Zola insisted, grabbing Blake's hand and taking him toward her playroom.

"Well, the credit all goes to Derek. I didn't do a damn thing," Meredith laughed. "I just live here." She guided Izzie into the living room and motioned for her to take a seat. "Can I get you anything to drink? We have...uh, water, orange juice, and milk. Sorry, no tequila."

Izzie laughed. "I'm good, actually." She then met eyes with Meredith and sighed. "You know, you're really lucky. Derek is a great guy, and I'm sure he's an awesome father. Your kids are lucky to have him as their dad." And she looked at Bailey. "And who's this little prince? I can't say we've met."

"This is Derek Bailey Shepherd, but he's better known as Bailey," Meredith introduced Izzie to her son.

"Wow, you named your kid after Dr. Bailey? Seriously?" Izzie burst into laughter.

"She's saved my life on multiple occasions," Meredith said. "I guess I owed it to her because without her, I wouldn't be here and neither would my son."

"_Okay_. Well, I named Blake after a country singer, so I guess I don't have a ton of room to talk," Izzie laughed. "So, that's the Nazi, Jr., then?"

"Dr. Bailey hasn't been _the Nazi _in a long time," Meredith confided. "Oh, but did you hear what the new interns and residents are calling me?" Izzie shook her head, and Meredith smiled, "Medusa."

Izzie laughed. "The Greek monster who had venomous snakes for hair? Why would they call you that? You're like the anti-Medusa. Sorry, Mer, I just can't see it. You're too nice."

"I'm definitely not as nice as I used to be be," Meredith said firmly. "Honestly, I don't blame them for calling me Medusa, especially last year, before I found out I was pregnant." She sighed, then admitted, "I wasn't in a great place."

Izzie frowned. "I'm sorry to bring it up, and you don't have to talk about it if you don't want, but when was the plane crash?"

Meredith exhaled through her nose. "Two years ago this June." She swallowed the spit in her throat. Meredith couldn't believe it was nearly two years ago she'd lost her sister. She looked up at the picture of Lexie and Zola on the mantel. Zola had the biggest smile on her face, and Lexie did too. Lexie adored Zola, and Zola loved her aunt. She then looked at Bailey, who had his tiny hand curled around her finger. It was a shame that Lexie would never get to meet Bailey. She would have loved him too.

Sometimes Meredith found herself wondering what would have happened if things had gone differently. What if Mark and Lexie hadn't died? What if they'd gotten back together? Meredith thought about how Mark and Lexie's kids would play with hers. They would have been so perfect. So adorable.

But Mark and Lexie were dead, and Meredith missed them every day. She knew Derek missed them too, but they didn't talk about it. There was too much pain and sorrow there. Meredith didn't want to think about it. Instead, she wanted to enjoy the life she had now. She wanted to enjoy her kids' childhoods. That's what mattered now. She missed Mark and Lexie, but they were gone. Zola and Bailey were here. Alive and well. They were what was important.

"Gosh, Mer. That must have been really hard on you. I know you were starting to grow closer to her around the time I left," Izzie said, and Meredith noticed Izzie's eyes turning toward the mantel.

"I don't really talk about it." Meredith hugged her son as chills ran down her spine.

"Right, yeah. I'm sorry for bringing it up. I was just curious."

"It's okay." Meredith exasperated a sigh. "Really, it's fine."

Zola and Blake ran into the living room, and Blake held his arm up to his mother. "Look at my awesome tattoo, Mommy!" he cried, and Meredith's eyes widened as she saw the little purple heart on the kid's arm. Zola had just learned how to draw a heart, and she was drawing them everywhere now.

"Zola, did you do that?" Meredith asked her daughter, who timidly nodded. Meredith released a sigh. "All her markers are washable, I swear."

"It's fine," Izzie chucked. "I think you did a beautiful job, Zola."

"Thank you," Zola smiled shyly. "Can we play doctor on Bailey?" Zola asked her mom.

"If you bring the doctor equipment out here, you can," Meredith told Zola; she didn't like the idea of Zola and Blake taking Bailey out of her sight. She knew Zola would never intentionally hurt her brother, but she was still three years old, and Blake was four. Bailey was still little; who knew what a three- and four-year-old were capable of doing to him. Bottom line: she didn't want him out of her sight.

"Okay!" Zola chimed, and she ran back into her room. Blake followed.

"So," Meredith said slowly, avoiding eye contact with Izzie. "That brings me to my question. When are you going to tell Alex?"


	10. Chapter 10

Izzie's face immediately froze. Meredith noticed her former roommate's hands clamming and sweat dripped down her face. "T-Tell Alex what?" Izzie stuttered.

"You know what I mean," Meredith replied. "That's why you're back, isn't it?"

"I seriously don't know what you're talking about," Izzie insisted. Her face reddened and she appeared to be avoiding eye contact with Meredith. Sweat was dripping from her forehead. Meredith could tell she was lying.

"If you don't know what I'm talking about, why are you sweating like a dog? Come on, Iz. You know you don't have to lie to me. I'm not going to tell anyone," Meredith said, though she was reluctant to mention the fact that Cristina already knew and had threatened to tell Alex. _Cristina wouldn't, _Meredith thought.

"Okay," Izzie exasperated a sigh. "Blake is Alex's. I found out I was pregnant shortly before I came back. I planned to tell Alex, and as I was about to tell him, he...he told me that he deserved better, so I left. I started over. And then I had Blake, and now he's the light of my world. I wouldn't change what I did, Mer."

"Kids have that effect on mothers," Meredith commented, looking at her own son.

"I've wanted to tell Alex all along, but we didn't exactly end on a good note. Now, Blake is at an age where he's going to start remembering things. He asked me about his dad for the first time about a month ago. I didn't know what to tell him." Izzie released a dismal sigh.

"What did you tell him?" Meredith asked.

"I couldn't lie to him," Izzie sighed, "so I told him that his daddy worked somewhere far away. Then he asked if his daddy didn't want him. I told him that his daddy wanted him very much, and he would see him someday. And...then I saw the advertisement for the job here. Of course, I didn't even know if Alex still worked here, but I knew that someone would know where he was nonetheless, so I applied for the position." Izzie paused, and locked eyes Meredith. A tear formed in her eye. "When I first saw the hospital had been renamed _Grey Sloan Memorial_, my first thought was that something had happened to you. I started crying."

"Well, I'm right here," Meredith sighed.

"And I'm glad you are. I mean...I don't mean that I'm glad it was Lexie and not you…" Meredith's face froze. "I should probably just shut up."

"Yeah," Meredith agreed softly.

Zola and Blake ran back into the room, holding the toy doctor bag. Zola smiled at her brother. "Bailey, your doctors are here!" She reached out her arms, and Meredith gently handed her son over to his sister.

"Be gentle with him, Zo," Meredith told her daughter.

"Don't worry, Mommy!" Zola giggled, gently setting her brother on the floor. She also took a pillow off the couch and put it behind Bailey's head.

_Don't worry? _Meredith's eyes widened. Worrying was all she did. It was all she she ever did. She worried about Zola and Bailey. She worried about Derek, especially now that he was traveling more. What if there was another plane crash and he wasn't lucky enough to survive? This time, she wouldn't be with him. She wouldn't be able snuggle next to him in the cold, dark nights as he waited for search and rescue. What if he found someone else to snuggle next to?

Meredith was beginning to think _worry _was her middle name. Meredith Worry Grey. It suited her well.

"Hi, Bailey. I'm Dr. Blake. I'm gonna take good care of you," Blake said, putting the stethoscope around his neck. Bailey giggled. "First, I need to check your heart." Blake pressed the heart chest piece against Bailey's chest and listened. Meredith and Izzie both smiled as they watched the incredibly serious expression on Blake's face. He turned to Zola. "Dr. Zola, I think we're gonna need to do heart surgery on Bailey. Get ready to scrub in with me!"

"All right, Doctor!" Zola replied, and she ran into the kitchen. She took the step stool that she used to reach the sink. She turned on the water and began scrubbing her hands. Blake also ran over and washed his hands.

"We're ready to operate!" Blake announced.

"It's a bootiful day to save lives!" Zola mimicked her father, and Izzie chuckled. Meredith had been the one to teach Zola her daddy's special tagline that he used before each surgery. Derek had been absolutely tickled to death the first time he heard his daughter say it.

"Doctors, where are your gloves, now?" Meredith asked, raising an eyebrow. "You don't want to pass along any germs to your patient."

"We don't got any," Blake said.

Meredith went into the kitchen and pulled out two sets of plastic gloves. They would be a little big for Zola and Blake, but they were good enough to play along. She handed the gloves to the kids, who eagerly put them on. Izzie and Meredith both giggled at how adorable the kids looked in the oversized gloves. Meredith pulled out her phone. "Kids, smile for the camera," Meredith said, and Zola and Blake both looked at Meredith so she could get a few cute pictures.

She and Izzie watched as Blake and Zola performed "open heart surgery" on Bailey, who was surprisingly content through the whole process. Izzie and Meredith both took lots of pictures of the kids playing.

"It's moments like these that make me so grateful for everything that's happened. I wouldn't change my life now for the world," Izzie said softly.

"I know what you mean," Meredith said. "We do have the life."

"I'm glad that Blake has a friend," Izzie said. "I'm even more glad that it's your daughter."

"They'll be good friends," Meredith nodded.

"Who knows, maybe we'll be in-laws one day," Izzie laughed.

Meredith's eyes widened. "Well, technically, _we _wouldn't be in-laws. We'd be in-laws to each other's kids. But I don't want to think about that right now." Meredith chuckled. "Let's just enjoy their childhood."

"Agreed," Izzie nodded her head. "The thought of him getting any older is terrifying me. I can't believe he's already four. He'll be in kindergarten next year. Before I know it, he'll be dating and shutting me out of his life like I did my parents."

"Maybe not," Meredith said. "I mean, maybe he won't shut you out of your life. Maybe you'll have a close relationship."

"I hope," Izzie sighed. "He says he loves me now, but we all told our parents that we'd never tell them we hated them at one point."

"I didn't," Meredith chuckled. "I think I first told my mom I hated her when I was three."

It was getting dark out. Meredith checked the time on her phone. Seven o'clock. That meant it was already ten o'clock on the east coast. Where was Derek? She was surprised he hadn't called her already. Just as the thought crossed her mind, her phone started ringing. Derek's face appeared on her screen. "Hey, Derek," she answered the phone.

"Hey, so did you tell my sister to go home?" Derek asked, immediately jumping back on that horse.

Meredith sighed. He hadn't let that go, though she hadn't expected him to. "You know the answer to that. We can talk about it later, okay, Derek?"

"You mean to tell me she's there right now? I've left voicemails and text messages on her phone. She's not responding," Derek said.

"She's in a surgery. You'd be proud of her, I think. She stole one of Shadow Shepherd's patients after he told the patient her tumor was inoperable."

"Of course she is," Derek scowled, but then his tone softened, "Oh, did she?" Then he bitterly added, "As long as she doesn't kill the patient. I don't need her ruining the Shepherd name."

"Derek," Meredith scolded her husband. "How many patients have _you _taken on after they were told their tumor was inoperable? Don't even go there. Shadow Shepherd thinks you're having a competition to see who can kill the most patients."

"Of course he does," Derek murmured, then sighed, "So, what are you doing right now?"

"I'm sitting here with Izzie right now watching our kids play. We're having lots of fun, and you should be jealous."

"Oh, I am," Derek laughed.

"I've got a bunch of new pictures that you're going to be dying to see. Oh, I posted one on Instagram…" She trailed off, remembering the activity she had seen from Derek's account involving his ex-wife. She wasn't going to say anything right now, though. She would wait until later; after Izzie left and the kids were in bed.

"I wanna say hi to Daddy!" Zola bounced off the floor, leaving her patient behind.

"He's gonna bleed out!" Blake called out, but Zola ignored him. She grabbed the phone from Meredith.

"Hi, Daddy! I wove you!" Zola exclaimed. Meredith didn't hear what Derek said, but she imagined that he told her that he loved her too. "Yes, I'm being a good girl! Here's Mommy back!" And she handed her phone back to her mother and ran back over to Blake and Bailey.

"I'm back," she laughed. "Want to say hi to Izzie?" She hit the speaker button and turned the phone toward Izzie.

"Hey, McDreamy!" Izzie called into the phone.

She heard Derek say, "How's it going, Izzie?"

"Oh, it's going pretty well," Izzie replied. "Happy to be back in Seattle. I missed your wife."

"So, you know how I feel right now," Derek laughed. Zola and Blake were conversing about how to save Bailey's life. Derek could apparently hear them. "Do I hear another kid in the background, or did Bailey start talking in full sentences while I've been gone?"

"No, that's my son," Izzie enlightened Derek. Meredith remembered that she hadn't told Derek about Blake when they were on the phone earlier. She'd originally planned to, but the conversation had been side-tracked by the idea of having another child and then Amelia. If only Derek knew Amelia's _real _intentions for being in Seattle.

"Your son?" Derek's voice rattled with surprise.

"Yeah, and it is getting late," Izzie commented, then looked at Blake. "Blake, I think it's time to say goodbye to Zola. We need to go home now."

Blake frowned. "But I don't wanna go."

"It's almost your bedtime, and I'm sure Zola wants to talk to her daddy," Izzie told Blake.

Blake stuck out his lip, pouting. "Okay, Mommy." He turned to Zola and wrapped his arms around her. "I had fun!" And then he looked at Bailey. "You're all better now, Bailey!" Bailey cooed, and then Blake gave Bailey a hug too.

Izzie laughed. "You'll see Bailey and Zola tomorrow at daycare, Blake."

"Yay!" Blake chimed as he stood and ran over to his mother.

Izzie sighed, looking at Meredith. "It was nice catching up with you." She paused and softened her voice, "And, uh, I'll tell him soon." Meredith knew that she was talking about Alex. She then rose her voice, "It was nice talking to you too, McDreamy! I'm sure I'll see you soon."

Derek's laugh rattled through the receiver; he was still on speaker. "Bye, Izzie! I'll be back tomorrow, so I'm sure we'll have a run-in sooner or later."

Meredith nodded, and waved goodbye to Blake and Izzie. "Okay, they're gone," she told Derek.

"Do you want to FaceTalk?" Derek asked.

Meredith laughed and corrected her husband, again, "FaceTime, and sure. Let me grab my iPad." She watched the kids through the corner of her as walked across the room to take her iPad out of her work bag. She saw Zola was tickling Bailey, and he was giggling uncontrollably. She walked back to the couch and said, "Okay, kids. I'm going to call your daddy."

"Yay!" Zola stood up and jumped on the couch. Meredith leaned over, picked Bailey up, and sat him on her lap. Her iPad was already on, so all she had to do was click the FaceTime app. Zola leaned into her breast so she could get a clear view of the screen. Meredith wrapped her arm around the little girl, while supporting Bailey on her knee. All of her recent calls were to Derek, from yesterday and from when they had tested the app before Derek left for D.C. She clicked on his name, and her iPad began calling Derek.

"I'm calling—" she started to say, but Derek's face had already appeared on her screen. She ended the call on her cellphone and set down her phone. "Look, it's Daddy," she said to the kids.

"Hi, Daddy!" Zola waved eagerly to her father.

"Well, if it isn't my entire family.. This is a beautiful picture." Derek's smile filled the screen. His hair was a mess, and Meredith couldn't avoid the tiresome wrinkles underneath his eyes. He looked sleep deprived, though it was three hours later there. She knew he would stay up late just to talk to her. Meredith was reminded of the early days of their relationship, when they would skip out on sleep and talk all night. Of course, the talk was mixed in with sex too. Sometimes Meredith missed those days. The days before children. But then she looked at Zola and Bailey, and she couldn't imagine her life without them.

"You know, if you press down the circle and the power button, you can take a picture of us," Meredith told her husband. A perplexed expression took over his face as he appeared to be looking for the buttons.

"The circle and the…" He disappeared. She knew that meant that he had accidentally closed the app.

"Where Daddy go?" Zola pouted, raising her head off her mother's chest and looking up at her with sad eyes.

"Hold on, Love Bug," Meredith said, calling Derek again. After a few seconds, Derek was back on the screen.

"You're back!" Zola smiled. "Hi, Daddy! Again."

"Yeah, that didn't work," Derek announced, releasing a frustrated sigh.

"You have to hold down the buttons at the exact same time, or it won't work," Meredith told him.

"Okay, let's try this again," Derek shook his head, and he studiously looked for the buttons. "The screen just flashed!" Derek gasped, his eyes widened in shock.

"You did it! If you go into your pictures, you'll find a screenshot. But don't look now. I don't want to lose you again," Meredith laughed. "I'll show you how to find them when you get back."

"Meredith, I know where my pictures are stored. I'm not _that _technology illiterate. How else would I post pictures on Instagram? I swear, you give me no credit," Derek said while chuckling.

"Right. Sorry," Meredith apologized.

"You should be," Derek teased, then his attention directed to the kids. "Wow, I swear, you've both grown since I talked to you last night!"

"Hehe!" Bailey giggled and babbled some random syllables, then he cheered,. "Dada!"

"Yes, that's your dada," Meredith said soothingly, pulling her son closer so he didn't fall off her knee. Bailey clapped and rubbed his pointer finger against the screen. She was quick to take his hand before he accidentally ended the call.

"Don't swear, Daddy!" Zola scolded her father. "It not nice to swear." Meredith and Derek both laughed at the cuteness.

"Okay, I won't," Derek said. "Were _you _a good girl today, Zo?"

"Yup!" Zola raised her chin and snickered as she looked at her mother. Meredith exhaled and laughed gently, remembering the cookie incident from earlier.

"Was she really good, Meredith?" Derek asked; Meredith sensed the suspicion in his voice.

"Other than leaving her leftover cookie from snacktime in her pocket and turning herself into a chocolatey mess, she was pretty good," Meredith informed Derek.

"You did that?" Derek let out a gasp. Zola nodded shyly. "You lied to Daddy, Zozo? Lying isn't nice. Daddy's sad now." Derek frowned and put fists over his eyes, pretending to cry.

"Sorry, Daddy," Zola whispered. "But the cookies were soooo good! I didn't mean to be bad. I'm sowwy."

"I forgive you, Zo. Just don't do it again, okay, sweetheart?"

"Okay, Daddy. I won't. I pwomise!" Zola replied sweetly. She puckered her lips and blew her daddy a kiss with her right hand.

Bailey put his hands on the screen again and pulled the iPad toward his mouth. "Bails, don't," Meredith said, grabbing her son's hands. He fussed as she moved his hands away from the tablet. Tears rolled down his face. She intertwined her fingers with his fingers, and he pulled her pointer finger into his mouth and started sucking on it. He bit down on her finger, and she could feel his little teeth cutting through his gums. "Zo, hold your brother. I'm going to go grab his teething ring from the refrigerator," Meredith said, looking at Derek one last time before propping the iPad up on the counter. She aimed it at the kids, so they could see their father.

Bailey started to bawl when Meredith got up.

"Mommy, help!" Zola pleaded; Meredith could see Zola fighting a squirming, crying Bailey through the corner of her eye. She made a quick dash to the refrigerator.

"Shhhh, Bails, you're okay," Derek said soothingly, and he started singing. "Twinkle, twinkle, little star. Up above the world so high, like a diamond in the sky. When the blazing sun is gone. When he nothing shines at night. Then you show your little light. Twinkle, twinkle, all the night."

Bailey had stopped crying just as Meredith returned to hand her son his teething ring.

"Here you go, little guy," she said calmly, handing her son his dinosaur-shaped teething ring; he eagerly took it from his mother's hands and began sucking on it. She took a seat between her children; they were all in perfect view of the iPad webcam. "You're amazing, Derek." Meredith released a sigh. "How is it you can calm him and I can't?"

"Simple. He's a daddy's boy," Derek laughed. "I've also spend a little more time with him than you have, so I have an unfair advantage."

"I miss you, Daddy. You cooler than Mommy," Zola said with a sigh.

Meredith's jaw dropped, in awe that those words were coming out of her three-year-old's mouth. It wasn't that long ago that she was the cool parent, or so she thought. Derek could never get Zola to put on her shoes, but Meredith didn't have a problem. However, times changed after Bailey was born and Derek agreed to spend more time with the kids so she could focus on her career. The kids both were used to Derek being around.

"I don't know about that," Derek told Zola. "I think your mommy's pretty cool."

"Not as cool as you," Zola retorted. Meredith's heart sank in her chest.

"Zo, be nice. You're going to hurt your mommy's feelings," Derek scolded.

"It's okay, Derek," Meredith sighed. "It's true. You are cooler than I am. After all, that's why you're in D.C., isn't it? That's why the president wanted _you_. I, for one, think I'm quite fortunate to have such a cool husband."

Derek shrugged. "I guess you're right. I am pretty cool. But I'd rather be with you."

"And be uncool?" Meredith teased.

They talked for another thirty minutes before Bailey began fussing again. He tossed his teething ring on the floor and started to scream.

"Shhhh, Bails," Derek said soothingly, but not even the sound of his voice was soothing him now.

"I think someone's sleepy," Meredith declared. She looked at Zola, "I think it's time for you and your brother to get ready for bed."

Zola stuck her lip out. "I'M not sleepy." Meredith looked at the time. It was ten past nine. Zola had already taken bath and was in her pajamas, so all she needed was to brush her teeth. It was only a matter of time before she'd be tired too.

"Okay, then, why don't you talk to your daddy while I get Bailey ready for bed, then?" Meredith suggested, and Zola nodded eagerly. Meredith hoped she could trust Zola alone with the iPad while she took gave Bailey a bath and changed him into his pajamas. She wasn't too worried, because as long as Derek didn't get disconnected, Zola would be occupied.

Bailey calmed down once he was in the bathtub. He was entertained by his rubber duckies, which he loved very much. Once he was bathed, dried, and changed into his pajamas, Meredith carried him out to the living room, where she found Zola zonked out on the couch and Derek watching her sleep. He lifted his pointer finger over his mouth. "Shhh," he whispered.

"How long has she been out?" Meredith whispered.

"About ten minutes," Derek replied softly.

Meredith smiled, looking at her slumbering daughter. For not being sleepy, she'd passed out pretty early. This was going to be easier than she'd initially predicted. She carefully grabbed the iPad while balancing Bailey in her other arm and took her husband and son into Bailey's nursery. Sleeping on the couch wouldn't hurt Zola.

It wasn't long before Bailey was out too. Now the grown-ups could play.

* * *

**A/N: The next chapter is actually one of my favorites. It's also a bit dirty (you've been warned). Enjoy the fluff while it lasts. *wink***


	11. Chapter 11

**Warning: This chapter contains sexual content. **

**A/N: Two days until Grey's comes back! I'm so, _so_ excited. This hiatus has felt like an ETERNITY! Let's hope for a quality MerDer storyline for 10B. :)**

* * *

Meredith had a mini-panic attack when she stepped out of Bailey's room and realized Zola was no longer lying on the couch. Her heart raced.

"What's wrong, Meredith?" Derek asked, noticing his wife's mouth hanging open.

"Zola's gone!" Meredith gasped.

"Relax, she probably went into her room," Derek said. His voice was so calm and soothing. She didn't know how he always managed to remain so relaxed in a crisis. Staying calm had never been one of her strengths. Her tendency toward anxiousness had only gotten worse as she'd become a wife and a mother. Derek continued, "She does that all the time; falls asleep on the couch and then wanders into her room."

Meredith tiptoed to her daughter's bedroom and peaked in the room to find Zola passed out under her covers. She breathed a sigh of relief. She pointed the camera toward Zola. "You were right," she told Derek.

"All I see is darkness," Derek whispered; the iPad pixels weren't detailed enough to show the outline of a sleeping Zola, "but I'd get far away from her room before she wakes up, if I were you."

Meredith stepped lightly across the floor and made dash for her bedroom. She yawned; her eyes were heavy, and she longed for sleep. But when she saw her empty bed, she exasperated and looked at her iPad screen. "I miss you," she said. She propped her iPad up on her bed and laid on her stomach. Derek was smiling dorkily, and she watched as he removed his shirt. She studied his chest hair, longing to place her hand on it; she imagined the heat radiating from his skin. She imagined the furnace from his body radiating onto her skin. She pictured hovering her hands over his chest hair. Meredith closed her eyes, imaging their lips touching. She imagined his soft lips pressing against her neck as his hands moved down her waist, then they gently hovered over her hips. But nothing she imagined could substitute reality.

"You could afford to lose your shirt," Derek teased. "If I were there, I'd tear it off."

Meredith giggled as she ran her hands underneath her shirt and raised her shirt above her head. She looked down at her purple-laced bra and noted the three faded scars on her abdomen. The first, the least noticeable, was from when she'd had her appendix removed during her internship. It was barely noticeable now, but she still noticed. The second was from when she'd donated part of her liver to her alcoholic father. The last one, and the most noticeable, was the scar from her C-section ten months ago. The C-section she hadn't wanted but had to have because her son wasn't positioned right to deliver vaginally.

She'd never been overly self-conscious about her scars. Derek said they made her sexy. According to him, they made her human. Everyone had scars. Some were just deeper than others. Some were more visible. Some were barely visible at all. With time, though, all scars faded as part of the healing process. Though they never disappeared completely. That's why they're called scars. Derek liked to gently run his fingers over her scars and then lightly kiss them. She didn't mind it, either.

"Oooh, purple," Derek said, noticing the color of her bra. "Sexy. I'm not there, though, so who're you wearing that for?"

Meredith rolled eyes and laughed. "It's just a bra. There's nothing special about it. It's no different than all my other bras. Other than the fact it's purple. Nothing special about it."

"Uh-huh, that's what you want me to think. It still looks pretty fancy to me," Derek noted. "You better not be showing off your fancy bra to some other guy."

"Someone's a little jealous," Meredith pointed out. "I'm not the one who had another woman's hands all over my body last night."

"Huh?" Derek raised an eyebrow.

"Callie," Meredith said.

"Ooooh. See, I'd already forgotten about that," Derek laughed. "Wait, that made you jealous?"

Meredith shrugged, releasing a sigh. "Maybe just a little bit." She held her pointer finger and thumb about a centimeter apart.

Derek burst into laughter. "Why?"

"I don't know," Meredith shook her head and sighed. "Maybe because she could physically touch you and I couldn't."

"Oh, well, don't worry. _Nothing _happened between Callie and me. The only hands I want on my body are yours," Derek said, then seductively added, "Now, you should lose some more clothing. Just a suggestion." He winked.

Meredith blushed, though she didn't know why she was blushing. It's not like he hadn't seen her naked many, many times. They'd just never done _this _before. Undressing in front of her iPad was entirely new for her. She teased Cristina when she used to sext Owen all the time. Meredith sent Derek dirty texts on occasion, but they were more subtle; Derek wasn't a huge fan of texting in the first place. He was also terrified he'd lose his phone and he didn't want to risk his texts coming to haunt him in the future, if his phone landed in the hands of the wrong person.

She removed her jeans at the same time as he removed his. They were in sync. He was sitting with his legs wide open and her eyes focused on his bulge in his briefs.

"Hot damn, Meredith!" Derek shrieked when he saw her back-laced panties. "Are you _sure _you haven't been trying to impress someone else today?"

"Just you," Meredith laughed. "You're the only one I want to impress."

"I could just wrap you in my arms right now and unhook your bra, slide off your panties, and…."

She saw his bulge growing through his underwear. Her pulse was quickening. Her heart rate sped as she imagined Derek unhooking her bra. Her arms reached behind her back as she felt for the hook of her bra. She unfastened the first hook, and then the second, and finally the third. Her bra fell off her body, and Derek's slid his hand inside his underwear. She let out a moan. "Oh, Derek." She felt her insides tightening. Her entire body was pulsating. She couldn't believe how this was turning her on. She wanted so badly to touch Derek. To feel Derek inside her. She needed him now. Here. With her.

_Bang. _There was a loud pound on her bedroom door.

Before she could move to cover herself, her bedroom door swung open.

"Hey, Mer—oh, this is awkward." Meredith let out a scream and dove under the bedroom covers as Amelia spun around and ran out of the room.

"Fuck," Meredith cursed as she looked at Derek, who had, even though Amelia couldn't see him, covered himself with a blanket. His face was flushed.

"Amelia just saw you naked," Derek said, and then, to Meredith's astonishment, he burst into laughter.

"It's not funny!" Meredith hissed.

"You act like she's the first person other than me to see you naked, Mer; and you and I both know _that's _not true." Derek was still laughing hysterically. Meredith's face froze, not sure if he was referring to the fact that used to sleep around, or the fact that others had walked in on them having sex before, or maybe both. Derek finally stopped laughing, and he let out a sigh. "Remember when Webber walked in on us in my trailer?"

"How could I forget?" Meredith asked, and then sighed, "But at least we were already under the covers. Derek, I should let you go and go talk to her. I honestly wasn't expecting her to come back tonight. I imagined she'd sleep in an on-call room or something."

"Honestly, I wouldn't even bother talking to her about it. She'll probably forget all about it by tomorrow," Derek said. "This is my sister, Meredith. Besides, if anyone knows what it's like to be walked in on, it's her."

"Oh, so you…"

"Many times. The worst part was it was with different guys," Derek said.

"Oh, well, now I don't feel so bad." Meredith rolled her eyes and chuckled. Somehow she wasn't surprised. In some ways, Amelia did remind Meredith of an unsettled version of herself. She was prone to sporadic decisions, just like Meredith used to be. They'd both used substances to cope. Meredith had used alcohol as her coping mechanism. Amelia used alcohol and drugs. The difference? Meredith had never allowed her drinking to get in the way of her career. She knew her limitations. That was the difference between her and Amelia.

"Wanna pick up where we left off?" Derek asked, a hint of hopefulness in his voice.

"Not a chance," Meredith replied. "I really should be hitting the sack anyway. I'm exhausted."

"Me too," Derek sighed. "My plane will land at four p.m. Seattle time, so I'll see you soon. I love you."

"I love you, too," Meredith replied, and she ended the ca. She exhaled and looked toward the door. Even though part of her wanted to let it go and act like it hadn't happened, she still felt the need to at least say something to Amelia. She reached for a bathrobe and left the bedroom to find Amelia already lying on the couch with the lights out. Assuming she was asleep, Meredith quietly turned around to back to her room.

"I'm not asleep," Amelia groaned; Meredith saw her sit out and inhaled slowly as she walked back toward the couch. "Look, I'm sorry. I should've called or knocked or something. It's my own fault."

"It's all good," Meredith smiled weakly. "I wasn't expecting you back here tonight. How'd you get here?"

Amelia shrugged. "Same way I got here the first time. Took a cab. Thought your couch would be more comfy than an on-call room bed. They tend to be pretty firm, and your couch is soft. I'm not a fan of firm mattresses. Plus, I thought you'd want help with the kids in the morning."

"I can handle my kids on my own," Meredith said.

"Oh, Gosh. I'm not saying you're not perfectly capable of handling your kids on your own. I was just trying to be helpful. Hey, an extra hand never hurts, right?" Amelia smiled.

Meredith studiously observed Amelia. She still didn't know if she trusted Amelia. Should she? Had Amelia done anything worthy of trust? Sure, she'd cooked breakfast and she'd helped with the kids.

"How did your surgery go?" Meredith inquired.

"It was a success!" Amelia boasted. "I knew I could do it. The patient actually woke up just before I left and her vitals are great. I'm confident she'll make a full recovery. I've that resident Murphy monitoring her tonight. I do have to say, though, she was a bit of a dud in the O.R. I think I taught her a few things."

"The residents haven't had a whole lot of experience with neuro, especially since Derek's been gone and Shadow Shepherd isn't the best teacher," Meredith replied in Murphy's defense, though she wasn't entirely sure as to why she was defending Leah Murphy. She didn't know her too well, but from what she'd heard - specifically from Alex and Arizona - she was whiny and clingy. Though, that didn't have to affect her skills as a surgeon.

"Shadow Shepherd?" Amelia laughed. "That's what you call that Dr. Nelson guy? Nice. He's a joke."

"That's why we call him Shadow Shepherd. He used to be the Head of Neuro before Derek moved to Seattle. Now he's just turned into the back burner of neurosurgeons," Meredith said.

"I can tell," Amelia said.

There was a silence and then Meredith said quietly, "Derek knows you're here."

Amelia frowned and nodded slowly. "I figured. You didn't tell him…"

"No, I didn't. But he did tell me to tell you to go home," Meredith replied.

"Well, I knew he'd say that. Tell him I'm not going anywhere," Amelia insisted tartly.

"You can tell him yourself tomorrow," Meredith responded intensely and turned around. "Well, I'm going to bed. Goodnight, Amelia."


	12. Chapter 12

Meredith's morning began abruptly when she was brought to consciousness by the shrieks of her three-year-old daughter.

"YOU NOT MY AUNT! MY MOMMY TOLD ME NEVER TO TALK TO STWANGERS!" the little girl bellowed. "MOMMY! MOMMY! HELP! A STWANGER IN THE HOUSE! LET GO OF MY BWODDER, YOU BAD PERSON!"

Followed by her daughter's screams, were the sounds of her son's cries. Her children's screams pierced her eardrums as she took a deep breath. She rolled over Derek's once-warm side of the bed and felt the sheer coldness against her back. _Today's it, _Meredith thought. It was the last morning she would have to wake up to an empty. _For now, anyway. _Who knew how long it would be before Derek left again. She dreaded his business trips.

Meredith slid out of bed and planted her feet on the cool floor. She groggily stumbled out of the room as her eyes adjusted to the bright sun beating through the windows of the house. She found Zola, still in her pajamas, standing in the living room, looking frightened. Amelia was holding a crying Bailey. The little girl ran toward her mother. "Mommy, Mommy! Help!" Zola wrapped her arms around her mother. Meredith bent down and picked her daughter up. Tears of terror streamed out of Zola's eyes.

"Sweetie, calm down," Meredith said soothingly, rubbing her daughter's back. "This is your aunt, baby girl. Your Aunt Amelia. She's your daddy's sister." Zola was too young to remember the last time Amelia had been in town, and since she hadn't been home last night, she hadn't seen her. Meredith should have anticipated this.

"Oh," Zola whispered, and the fear in her face slowly faded.

"I'm sorry," Meredith apologized to Amelia. "I've always told her never to talk to strangers."

Amelia chuckled. "It's fine. In fact, I'd be more worried if she hadn't freaked out. I'm the one who should be sorry. I was hoping by my being here you'd get a little extra sleep. Apparently I've caused the opposite."

"It's fine," Meredith said, looking at the clock. Six o'clock. She yawned. "This is the time I'm normally up anyway. I have two back-to-back surgeries this morning, and I have to pick Derek up at the airport at four." Meredith looked at Zola. "Daddy's coming home today."

"Yay!" Zola exclaimed.

"Now that you know I'm not a stranger, Zo, how about you and I go make breakfast for your mommy and brother while your mom gets ready for work?" Amelia insisted, still holding Bailey in one arm while she held out her other hand. Meredith set Zola on the ground, but the little girl still looked timidly at Amelia. She looked for permission from her mother.

"It's all right, Zo. Amelia's pretty cool. Probably cooler than I am," Meredith winked, not forgetting that Zola had been so adamant about stating how much cooler her father was than her mother.

"I don't know about that. I have pretty high standards to beat, huh?" Amelia laughed. She looked up at Meredith. "I went shopping last night before I came back, since your refrigerator was practically bare. I got eggs, so I was thinking I could make omelets."

"What are om-a-lets?" Zola asked. The innocence shined so preciously in her eyes.

"You've never had an omelet?" Amelia's eyes expanded as she shot a shocked look at Meredith. "Your poor, deprived children! C'mon, Zo. Let me show you how to make an omelet."

Meredith inhaled slowly. "Just make sure she doesn't touch the stove." The idea of having Zola so close to a warm stove top frightened Meredith.

"Relax, Meredith. I've got this." She reached her hand out again and this time Zola took it. Meredith watched as her children went with their aunt into the kitchen. In the meantime, she went to take a shower.

The steamy water splashed onto her face, and all she could think about was Derek. For a moment, she found herself fantasizing that Derek was in the shower next to her. It'd been ages since they'd taken a shower or bath together. It used to be a frequent occasion; now it was rarity that they were even home when the other was in the shower or bath. She imagined his hands running down her wet torso. She pictured her hands touching his wet face as his lips pressed against hers. She imagined their bodies intertwining as they made love in the shower.

"AAAAAAAAH!" A loud scream from the kitchen killed her fantasies. She quickly rinsed the lavender conditioner out of her hair and grabbed her bath robe. She ran out of the bathroom, soaked, and dashed into the kitchen without a second thought.

"What happened?" Meredith gasped as she saw Zola's fingers soaking in a cup of water. Bailey was sucking from his bottle in his high chair.

"I told her not to, but s-she thought the red burner was pretty…" Amelia explained, and without thinking, Meredith slapped Amelia across the face. "Ow!" Amelia cried, touching her face, where a red mark that Meredith's hand had left behind was forming. "That's a great example to show your children," Amelia hissed.

"_This _is the reason Derek doesn't trust you with our kids," Meredith said bitterly. "You did exactly what I told you not to, and if you think I'm such a bad example, then maybe you should hop on a flight back to Los Angeles." Meredith inhaled a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. _Perfect. Amelia thinks I'm a bad mother, _Meredith rolled her eyes; perhaps convincing Amelia to keep her child wouldn't be so hard after all. She kneeled down to her little girl. "Let me see your finger, Zozo."

She gently removed the cold washcloth from Zola's hand and saw the light red swelling on her little girl's finger. It was a first degree burn. "It hurts," Zola cried.

"I bet it does. You're going to be okay, Love Bug. But I hope you learned your lesson. _Never _touch something that's red, okay? Red means hot," Meredith told her little girls.

"Strawberries aren't hot," Zola replied.

"Well, no. Not everything red is hot," Meredith sighed.

"So how am I sposta to know what hot and what not?" Zola asked innocently, and she stuck her lip out.

"Well," Meredith exhaled, looking at Amelia. "If someone tells you not to touch something red, then it's probably hot. Did Aunt Amelia tell you not to touch the stove?" Zola nodded. "See, she was trying to protect you."

"I'm sowwy," Zola said quietly.

"I think you learned your lesson. Now, we're going to play doctor, only Mommy's the doctor this time and you're the patient, Zola." Zola nodded showing understanding. Meredith saw Amelia sliding an omelet onto a plate as she took Zola into the bathroom to get some Aloe. She gently rubbed the Aloe on Zola's finger; Zola flinched as her finger tingled. "Okay, Zo, do you want the purple butterfly Band-Aid or the pink princess Band-Aid?" Meredith held the boxes so Zola could choose, though she already knew which Zo would choose.

"Purple butterfly!" Zola pointed at the purple butterfly Band-Aid box. Meredith smiled gently as she placed the bandage on her daughter's sore finger.

When Zola and Meredith re-entered the kitchen, Amelia had already set the table with three plates filled with cheese omelets. She'd also made Bailey a small plate of scrambled eggs. He was gazing strangely at the fluffy yellow eggs.

"I'm guessing he's never had eggs before," Amelia said carefully.

Meredith shook her head and stared briefly at the red mark on Amelia's face. "Look, Amelia, I'm sorry for slapping you. I overreacted."

"It's all right," Amelia said. "I have three sisters. I'm used to people overreacting." Meredith faked a smile. "Cheese omelet?" Amelia smiled as she handed a plate to Meredith, which Meredith took with hesitation. She saw that Amelia had made scrambled eggs for Bailey. Bailey had never eaten eggs before, and Meredith wasn't sure if he was supposed to eat eggs. Their pediatrician had told her she should introduce foods slowly to him, which she thought was common sense. He'd loved the French toast Amelia had made yesterday. He also loved instant oatmeal (since Meredith wouldn't dare try to make it over the stove). His favorite solid food was Honey Nut Cheerios, though.

She watched her son staring curiously at the yellow fluffy eggs.

"He's never eaten eggs," Meredith told Amelia. "I'm not sure if he's ready."

"He's ten months old?" Amelia asked and Meredith nodded. "Then he should be able to eat scrambled eggs. That's why I scrambled out the egg whites. They don't recommend babies under a year have the whites. Scrambled eggs are usually okay. Only way to find out is to let him try it." Amelia shrugged.

Meredith sat her plate down on the table, and without touching it, she picked up Bailey's little spoon. "This week's just full of new things for you to try, pumpkin," Meredith smiled at her little boy. His wide blue eyes studied the yellow stuff on his plate. He took his little fingers and wrapped them around one of the bites of eggs. The eggs were fluffy, but still mushy. The egg crumbled as he tried to pick it up. Meredith laughed, "Let me help you." She filled the spoon with a little bite of egg and slowly put it into Bailey's mouth. His face froze for a moment. And drool dripped down his mouth and he squished his face up as bits of the egg ran onto his bib, and then he spit the rest out. Tears started to flow from his eyes. Meredith looked up at Amelia and shook her head. "I don't think he likes eggs."

"Oh come on, Bailey. You have to like eggs," Amelia said, taking the spoon from Meredith's hand and filling the spoon with another of bike. "Lookie, Bailey. It's an airplane! Like the one your Daddy is going to be riding today." She waved the spoon up and down and tried to put it into Bailey's mouth, but he wouldn't open it.

"He doesn't like them, Amelia. Don't push him," Meredith said sternly, and she turned to her son. "Sweetie, I'll get you some cereal."

She saw in the corner of her eye that Zola had barely touched her eggs. "Mommy, can I have cereal, too? Pwease. This nasty!" She scrunched up her adorable face.

Meredith sighed. "I guess Zola doesn't like eggs, either."

"Well, shoot," Amelia sighed. "There goes my plan of serving a perfect breakfast. You haven't touched yours, either."

Truthfully, Meredith wasn't a huge fan of eggs either. She didn't _hate _them, per say. Nonetheless, she ate her omelet so Amelia didn't feel bad.

"You should finish getting ready," Amelia told Meredith once they'd finished breakfast. "I'll finish getting the kids ready too." Meredith froze as she looked back and forth between her two children. Amelia sighed. "Relax. The burners are off. We'll be fine."

Meredith was reluctant, but she agreed. She knew that Amelia had good intentions, and it wasn't entirely her fault Zola had gotten burnt. It could have just as easily had happened if Meredith had been in the kitchen. You could only control a preschooler to a certain limit. And it would only be a matter of time before Bailey was walking and running around, too.

She and Derek had their work cut out for them.

She didn't talk to Derek that morning. Meredith imagined that he was busy getting ready to come home, plus he wouldn't be able to call her when he was on the plane. Meredith tried not to worry too much, but knowing Derek would be on a plane today was enough to raise her anxiety level to its peak.

It had been so difficult for her to fathom flying again after the plane crash that had taken Mark and Lexie away from them. Eventually, she did. Though flying still made her nervous. The thought of Derek on a plane scared the living hell out of her. Knowing that his life was in the hands of a pilot, 45,000 feet above the ground, was absolutely gut-wrenching.

She tried to push the thought to the back of her mind.

Zola proved to be slightly difficult that morning. She was at that age where she liked to test adults' patience. Amelia had managed to get her dressed, but she wanted to wear her dance shoes to daycare. Meredith wouldn't have fought her, but since Zola had grown since last fall, her shoes were too tight for her feet now. Zola insisted she could fit into them, denying the fact that her feet were scrunched and would hurt all day if she wore them.

Finally, Meredith was able to talk her into wearing her tennis shoes. By that time, though, she was running late for her first surgery. Her phone was blowing up, and she didn't have the time to check it.

Amelia offered to drop the kids off at daycare as they walked in Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital's doors.

"Noooo!" Zola pulled at her mother's hand. "I want Mommy to take us!"

Meredith exhaled a sigh. She took Zola's hand and pointed toward the daycare. "Love Bug," she inhaled a deep breath, "your daycare is right over there. It's just a few steps away, see? You can give Mommy a kiss right now, and it won't make a difference if you give it to me out here or in there."

Zola still pouted, but she finally agreed. She gave Meredith a kiss on the cheek, and Meredith gave her little girl a tight hug and kissed her forehead. Amelia headed toward the daycare with the kids, and before Meredith could make a run toward the Attendings' lounge, she saw Izzie walking in the hospital doors with Blake.

"Hey, Mer!" Izzie waved. She looked down at her little guy. "Say hi to Mer, Blake."

"Hi!" Blake waved eagerly, and before Meredith could say another word, she saw another familiar face walk through the hospital doors.

_Alex._


	13. Chapter 13

It all happened so fast. Izzie was facing toward Meredith when Alex Karev stepped through the doors of Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital. Her back was turned away from Alex. Alex was looking down at his phone until he looked up at Meredith. Neither said a word, but Meredith's face must have given away that something was off. Alex froze in his steps. He turned in the direction Izzie and Blake stood. He looked as if he had just seen a ghost.

"I-Izzie," Alex stammered. "W-What are you _doing _here?" His face blistered red. His eyes narrowed angrily at Izzie.

"Um, it's a long story," Izzie said. She met eyes with Meredith. _Well, this is awkward._ "Nice to see you, too." She rolled her eyes, and then she tilted her head to look at her son. "Come on, Blake. We need to get you to daycare so Mommy can get to work."

"Um, yeah, and I have a surgery to get to," Meredith said, stepping away.

"Hold on!" Alex hollered in a raised voice. Meredith and Izzie both froze. "You don't get to run off. You." Alex looked directly at Meredith. "You knew Izzie was back, didn't you? That's why you were asking me all those weird questions yesterday. And you." He turned to Izzie. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I, uh, work here," Izzie said, showing Alex her identification card. Her cheeks flushed red as she avoided eye contact with her ex-husband.

Blake tugged at his mother's hand. "Mommy, I have to go pee," Blake said innocently.

Alex's eyes widened. "Mommy?" He stared intently at Izzie.

"Well, looks like you two have _lots _to talk about. And I have surgery. You two have fun." Meredith winked and started to run toward the Attendings' lounge, just as she saw Jo walking down the hall wearing her light blue scrubs. She was holding two coffees in her hands. Jo looked exhausted; her hair was a mess, and she had dark circles underneath her eyes. Meredith figured she was just getting off the night shift. "Jo!" Meredith called. "You shouldn't have." She snatched one of the coffees from Jo's hand and took a sip from the cup.

"Actually that was for…" Jo's face froze as she met eyes with Alex. "Alex. What's going on?"

"Walk away, Jo. Walk away," Meredith insisted dully.

"What's going on?" Jo called louder, walking closer to Alex, Izzie, and Blake. Meredith left, taking the coffee she'd snatched with her. She was going to need the caffeine, though she did feel a little guilty for stealing Alex's coffee. He was just about to find out that he had a kid. It was probably a good thing she'd taken the coffee; otherwise Meredith could easily see Alex throwing it at Izzie. Really, she'd just done Izzie a favor because the coffee was burning hot. It actually burned her tongue. Meredith suspected Jo had taken the coffee from the nurse's station, because the coffee in the cafeteria was always room temperature.

Meredith's eyes widened when she read the time on the wall. Daylights Savings Time had already passed, so she really was running late. Where had the time gone? _Shit_, she thought, quickening her stride toward the Attendings' lounge.

When she entered the lounge, she was surprised to find Amelia reclining on the couch, holding an iPad, acting as if she was going about her everyday routine.

"What are you doing in here, Amelia?" Meredith asked as she dropped off her belongings.

"Well, you're looking at your newest colleague!" Amelia announced, smiling proudly. "Hunt offered me a neuro attending position." She lowered her voice, "I think he fired Nelson."

"What?" Meredith stared at Amelia stupefied for a moment. She then checked her phone and saw she had seven missed text message. Four from Dr. Bailey, two from Stephanie, one from Derek, and one from Cristina.

She read Derek's text first.

_Derek: At the airport, boarding the plane. I love you. See you soon._

Meredith's heart fluttered. She was so happy that Derek was finally coming home, though she was also worried. She hadn't quite digested the fact that Amelia had told her that Hunt had offered her a position. Derek wasn't going to take that well.

Stephanie's first text was forty-five minutes go.

_Stephanie: I'm prepping the Lisey for surgery. _

_Stephanie: Where are you?_

Stephanie's last text was fifteen minutes ago. Meredith's texts from Bailey were back-to-back, within ten minutes of each other.

_Bailey: Are you going to show up for surgery?_

_Bailey: Hello? I'm here with Edwards outside OR 2, do you want me to take over?_

_Bailey: Are you coming?_

_Bailey: Answer your damn texts, Grey_

_Bailey: Well, since you can't be bothered to reply, I'm going into surgery. _

"Shit," Meredith said aloud, not even looking at Cristina's text. Bailey had sent her that text two minutes ago. She quickly texted back. _I'm on my way. _

She dashed out of the Attendings' lounge, leaving Amelia alone, and rushed toward OR 2. She put on her scrub cap as she barged into the operating room.

"I'm here," she gasped as she saw that Dr. Bailey's hands were already in her patient.

"Well, it's about time you show your tardy-face in this OR, Grey. I was beginning to think you'd gotten hit by a bus on the way to work," Dr. Bailey replied slyly.

"That's not funny," Meredith said, remembering George.

"Wasn't supposed to be funny, Dr. Grey. But when you don't answer your text messages, what do you expect me to think? I was actually contemplating on whether or not I should call the police once I finished _your _surgery," Dr. Bailey replied.

"I'm sorry," Meredith huffed. "But Zola…"

"Look, I get it, you're a mother. I've been doing the mommy routine for seven years now. Things come up with our kids. _I get it_. But that's why the technology Gods created _cell phones_. You should have texted your resident to let her know you were running late, then maybe I wouldn't have been standing here, wondering if you were dead."

"I'm sorry, it's not like me. I didn't realize I was running so late," Meredith confessed. "Please, I can take over now. It's my patient."

"Your patient who was left wondering where her doctor was all morning. She asked about you, you know. I had to explain that you were running late, so I would be taking over her surgery. She's my patient now, and this is my OR. I respect you, and I care about you, but get out of my OR, Grey."

"Dr. Bailey-"

Dr. Bailey turned to Stephanie. "Apparently Dr. Grey didn't understand my orders. Would you like to escort Dr. Grey out of my OR?"

Stephanie looked at Meredith, and Meredith scowled. "I understood just fine. I _don't _need an escort." She stormed out of the OR. She walked down the hallway and inhaled a deep breath. She was trying to fight back tears. Meredith glanced at the clock. She had two hours before her next surgery was scheduled, and after that, she would be ready to go to the airport and see Derek. She tried to focus on the fact Derek was coming home today. She couldn't wait to wrap her arms around him. To kiss his lips.

Though she dreaded what would happen next: When Derek found out that Amelia would now be working at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital. That she was pregnant, and she wanted them to adopt her child. He was eager to raise another child with _her_, but there was no way he would want to raise his sister's child.

And there was no way they could take on another kid now. She was already having her surgeries taken from her because she couldn't make it to work on time with two kids. How the hell did Amelia honestly expect she could handle a third?

"Mer!" she heard Cristina calling her.

Meredith didn't turn around. She didn't want Cristina to see that she was upset. She remembered last fall, when Cristina had given Dr. Bailey her heart-liver patient because she didn't think she was "prepared" for the surgery. The last thing she wanted was to tell Cristina that she hadn't made it to her surgery on time. _You've become the person we laughed at._

Even though she and Cristina were on the mend, the words still stung in her heart, because part of her knew that Cristina was right. They used to make fun of working mothers. They thought women who tried to have steady careers and be parents were stupid. After all, Meredith herself had been raised by a work-a-holic. But that was the reason she didn't want to devout her entire life to her work. She wanted to spend time with her family. She didn't want her children to resent her like she had her own mother. Thus, she was watching her career fall apart.

It didn't have to be like this, did it? It had to get easier. Mothers all over the world worked. Being a surgeon was a high-demanding career, but it wasn't like she had to do it alone. She had a husband. A husband who was receiving national recognition for his work. And there she was. Left at home alone with the kids.

Derek didn't ask for any of this. He really didn't, but he still took the job. Though she didn't blame him. Who could resist such an opportunity? Besides, it wasn't fair that he give up his career because they had children. But why should she? There had to be a balance. _Somewhere. _

Meredith only knew one thing for certain: Amelia was a lunatic if she honestly thought she and Derek were going to adopt her child.

"Mer?" Cristina called again. "Did you get my text?"

"Huh?" Meredith asked, pulling out her phone. She never had read Cristina's text message.

It was her only unread text message now.

_Cristina: Want to catch up at lunch? _

Meredith smirked. If she had time for lunch. She turned around, "I'd love to."

She made eye contact with Cristina, who frowned. "What's wrong, Mer?" They knew each other inside and out. They'd been best friends for almost eight years now.

"It's n-nothing," Meredith stammered, crossing her arms.

"Then why do you look like you're about to cry?" Cristina inquired.

"I don't," Meredith replied flatly. "It's just, uh, allergies." Her phone buzzed. She had a text message from Amelia.

_Amelia: 320 - 911! _

_Room 320? _Meredith thought. Wasn't that Katie Bryce's room number yesterday? Surely, by now, Katie had been discharged. She'd only had her appendix removed.

"I've got to go," Meredith said quickly, and she dashed up the stairs and ran toward room 320.

Katie Bryce was seizing when Meredith entered her room.

"What happened?" Meredith asked.

"She's having multiple grand mal seizures!" Amelia hollered. "Katie Bryce, 22, was admitted yesterday with severe abdominal pain."

"I know the patient," Meredith said. "Bailey performed an appendectomy on her yesterday."

"Patient was complaining of a headache last night, so Nelson did a head CT that came out clean. Bailey opted to keep her overnight for observation. She's Bailey's patient, so I paged her but she's in surgery. She told me to page you," Amelia rapidly filled Meredith in. "She's got diazepam, 2 milligrams lorazepam, I'm giving her a second dose now. There's definitely something going on here. It's not every day you see a patient come in for an appendectomy and then they start seizing."

Meredith's head spun as she looked at Katie, the young blonde woman who was shaking uncontrollably. "_What do you want to do, Dr. Grey?" _Déjà vu. The voices screamed in her head. She could hear the nurse yelling at her like it was just yesterday. "_What do you want to do?" _Helplessness lingered over her body. But she wasn't that naive intern anymore.

"_You've paged Dr. Shepherd and Dr. Bailey?"_

"Lorazepam's not working," Amelia said out loud. "Crap."

"_Phenobarbital - load her with phenobarbital."_

"_Pheno's in. No change."_

"_You page Dr. Shepherd?"_

She was an attending; an experienced surgeon.

"_I just told you."_

"_Well, page him again. STAT."_

Derek wasn't available now, and frankly, he wasn't needed. Meredith wasn't a resident now. She was an attending, and she was in charge. _"What do you want to do? Dr. Grey, you need to tell us what you want to do."_

_The machine was flatlining. "Heart stopped!"_

The monitor flat-lined. History was repeating itself. Katie was coding. _"Code blue! Code blue! Code blue!"_

"_Get the crash cart."_ Meredith's heart raced as she grabbed for the crash cart. This never got any easier. After seven years of working at Seattle Grace, seven years of crash cart duty, this was something that never got easier. Maybe it was because as a doctor, you never knew if you were going to be able to revive the patient. You never knew if their heart would start again. She looked at Katie as she prepared the crash cart. Just yesterday she had talked to her. Just yesterday Meredith had brought Zola and Bailey into this room. She was laughing as Zola tried to give her the crumbs of her leftover chocolate chip cookie. She was just a young woman recovering from an appendectomy. A young woman who used to be a devious teenaged girl who had finally grown up. Meredith swallowed. And on top of it all, Katie was also a mother. Her little girl was out there somewhere, probably asking when her mommy was going to come home.

"_Charge pallets to 200."_

"_Charge. Clear."_

Nothing.

_It wasn't working. _

"_Still V-fib. Nothing." _

She was still in V-fib.

"_19 seconds."_

"_Charge them to 300." _

"_300. Anything?" _

"_27 seconds. Charge to 360. Come on, Katie." _

"_49 seconds."_

She and Amelia tirelessly recharged the pallets.

"_It's 60 seconds. You're supposed to admit another drug."_

"Damn it, Katie, come on," Meredith whispered. "Come back for your little girl. Come back for Meredith, she needs you. _I _need you to come back."

"_Charge again. Charge again."_

"_I see sinus rhythm."_

"She's breathing," Amelia whispered.

"_Blood pressure's coming up."_

Meredith breathed a sigh of relief. Katie opened her eyes. "You're back," Meredith smiled.

"What happened?" Katie whispered hoarsely.

"_What the hell happened?"_

"_She had a seizure and her heart stopped."_

"_A seizure? You were supposed to be monitoring her."_

"_I checked on her..."_

"_I got her. Just - just go." _She remembered how pissed off Derek had looked.

"_You get a 911, you page me immediately. Not in the five minutes it takes you to get to the emergency. You're on my team, and if someone dies, it's my ass on the line." _Bailey's voice still rang in her head.

Meredith was the attending now. If somebody died, it was her ass on the line.

Meredith glanced at Amelia. "You had a seizure," Amelia explained to the patient. "I don't think we've met. I'm Dr. Shepherd. I'll be taking over for Dr. Nelson."

"Dr. Shepherd?" Katie repeated, and then groggily looked toward Meredith. "Related?"

"She's my sister-in-law," Meredith explained to Katie. Meredith met eyes with Amelia. "Katie was actually a patient of Derek's and mine about eight years ago. She suffered from a subarachnoid hemorrhage after a minor fall."

"Do you think that that's what is happening again?" Katie asked. "Do I have another brain bleed?"

"We'll have to run a few more tests," Amelia said. She pulled Meredith out of the room. "Subarachnoid hemorrhage from a minor fall? There's like a one in a million chance of that happening."

"Oh, believe me, I know. Derek didn't believe it at first, either," Meredith sighed. "But you don't need me anymore. I'm not sure why you paged me in the first place. She's neuro. And I'm willing to bet this has nothing to do with her appy."

"I thought you'd want to work with me, maybe," Amelia insisted.

Meredith chuckled. "Why are you so interested in getting me back into neuro? If I wanted to work neuro, I would have specialized in it."

"You just didn't want to work with Derek, and frankly, I don't blame you…"

"What do you know about that?" Meredith asked. Had Derek really talked to either Amelia or, heaven forbid, Addison about their agreement not to work together in order to save their marriage?

"Oh, the last time I was here, I asked Lexie about why you weren't working with Derek. She told me that you and Derek had gotten into a big argument, so you'd left neuro. She didn't give me specifics. But it makes sense. If something goes wrong in the OR, then it's easy to blame each other. And we both know how Derek doesn't like to be wrong."

Meredith froze at the mention of her late sister. She didn't say a word. But she knew she couldn't be upset with Lexie. She was gone, and there wasn't a passing day Meredith ceased to miss her. She missed her so much that she still found it impossible to talk about her. Meredith swallowed the hard spitball in her moist throat. "I have a surgery soon. Find a resident to assist you on Katie's case," Meredith said blandly and headed off to her surgery. She was early, and that was a good thing. She wasn't about to risk losing another surgery to Bailey.

* * *

**A/N: Thank you all so much for the reviews – they're like candy for writers. Oh, and you'll find out more about the Alex/Izzie/Jo situation primarily through conversations Meredith has with Izzie, Alex, and Jo. I ship both Izzex and Jolex, so admittedly, I'm not even sure who he should choose. You'll get to hear everyone's story, though, and I certainly welcome feedback – who do YOU think he should choose? There's certainly some impending drama to come that I've already written – for everyone involved with this fic (Mainly MerDer + Amelia and the Izzie/Alex/Jo triangle), though I'm also trying to incorporate enough fluff to even out the drama and tension as well. **


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N1: I'm not sure I'd get used to such fast updates. I always try to make sure I have at least three chapters banked before I post a new chapter, and it just so happens I've been writing a lot lately – I have the next several chapters plotted out in pretty good detail as well. Also, I'm going to D.C. next week (with Derek! … If only), so I probably won't update much, if at all, next week, so I want to update as much as possible this week!**

* * *

She didn't bother waiting for Edwards. Instead, she began prepping her patient, a forty-three year old female who was having a laparoscopic gallbladder removal. The patient was already ready to be rolled into the operating room when Edwards entered the room.

"You've already prepped her?" Dr. Edwards asked. "Look, Dr. Grey, I'm sorry about…"

"It's already forgotten," Meredith cut in, and gave Stephanie a faux smile. The truth was, it wasn't forgotten. She would never forget that Dr. Bailey had taken her surgery. It was done. It was over. And there was nothing she could do about it now. Meredith knew it was her own fault. She should have checked her messages. She should have let Stephanie know she was running late. It wasn't like her not to communicate with her colleagues when she was running late, but she'd been so preoccupied.

The truth was Amelia was a distraction. She claimed she was trying to help, but really she was clouding Meredith's judgment. She'd just shown up, without a head's up, and asked her to adopt her baby. And now she was trying to act like her being there was a good thing. She was trying to make it seem like she actually cared about the people here. And now she was working at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital.

What the Hell had Meredith gotten herself into?

She was beginning to wish that she'd followed Derek's orders and had told Amelia to go home. Meredith was just _trying _to be nice to Amelia, though. She was Derek's family. His blood. Meredith hadn't been very welcoming to Derek's family in the past. She and Lizzie had butted heads last year, though Meredith had later realized Lizzie had a point. They were Derek's sisters. Lizzie had donated part of her nerves so Derek could feel in his hand again. It was because of her that Derek could even operate. Hell, Derek wouldn't have even gotten this offer with the president if it weren't for Lizzie. _And life would be so much simpler_.

The bottom line: They were his family.

Also, Meredith missed Lexie, and part of her felt as if she was using Amelia to substitute the piece of her soul that had gone missing when Lexie died. It'd taken her a long time to let Lexie in. Meredith wasn't used to having a family. Blood hadn't meant anything to her when she was growing up. The term family was so foreign. But then she learned to love Lexie. Lexie had been a good sister, and no one could replace her.

But that piece in Meredith's heart was still missing, and having Amelia in Seattle, spending time with her kids, in a way, filled that emptiness she felt.

Though she couldn't accept the fact that Amelia intended to drop her own child on Meredith and Derek's doorstep and disappear. Meredith could tell that Amelia genuinely cared about her niece and nephew, even though she barely knew them. She also seemed to genuinely care about her brother, although the jealousy was in plain sight. Meredith just couldn't wrap her finger around what in Amelia's head would give her the impression that Meredith and Derek were a better fit to raise her child than she herself.

It was a smooth surgery. She barely spoke to Stephanie other than to tell her what to do.

Meredith had about an hour before Derek was scheduled to arrive at the airport. She checked her phone and saw she had a text from Cristina that had been sent only three minutes prior.

_Cristina: Going to grab food. Want to join me?_

Her stomach rumbled. She hadn't eaten since breakfast, and the egg taste still lingered on her taste buds. Meredith texted back. _Meredith: Don't have much time, but would love to catch up. Meet in the cafeteria?_

Cristina texted back almost instantly. _Cristina: Sounds great!_

First, Meredith had to drop off some extra gloves to the supply closet. From outside the closet, she could hear voices.

"How could she do this to me?" she heard Alex crying loudly. His voice was raspy, like he'd been crying. "Who _does _that? Who doesn't tell a man he has a kid? How _could _she?"

_Crap, _Meredith thought, realizing Izzie must have told Alex the truth about Blake. Of course he was upset. He had every right _to be _upset. Meredith's heart ached for Alex.

"I don't know," Meredith heard Jo say softly. "I don't know."

Meredith smiled weakly because Jo was comforting him. Although she wondered what was going through Jo's mind. It couldn't be easy for her. After all, Izzie wasn't just some random woman that Alex had knocked up during a one-night stand. He _had_ actually loved Izzie.

"You don't have to stay," Alex said. "I understand if you don't want to be with me anymore."

"That's crazy talk!" Jo cried. "Alex, I _am not _leaving you. Don't think just because you have a kid now means I'm going to stop loving you. You didn't know. It's not your fault. You did nothing wrong. It's not your fault your ex-wife is a crazy lunatic."

Meredith creaked the door open. She planned to drop the gloves off and then make a clean getaway, but Alex's face froze on her when she opened the door. His eyes were bloodshot. He'd obviously been crying a lot. Meredith had only seen Alex cry on a couple occasions; one being when he thought Izzie was going to die from cancer. The most recent being when his dad was dying.

"Alex," she said quietly.

"You knew." Alex clenched his fists together and sprung off the ground. He grabbed Meredith's shoulders tightly. "You fucking knew I had a kid, and you didn't tell me. You've known all along, haven't you? You went four fucking years without telling me I have offspring." He shook her shoulders. Her head spun.

"Alex!" Jo cried. "Let her go!" She grabbed Alex's waist, and he loosened his grip on Meredith. Their eyes met as he set her down. The aching pain shined in his eyes. Jo met eyes with Meredith. "Dr. Grey, I am _so _sorry. He's going through a lot right now."

"I know," Meredith said. "It's okay." She turned to Alex and hissed, "And I didn't know. At least until yesterday."

A pager beeped. They all checked their phones. It was Jo's.

"Crap," Jo said. "It's Robbins. I have to go." She put her arm around Alex's waist and kissed his cheek. "It's going to be okay, Alex. I'm not going anywhere. We'll get through this together."

He didn't look so sure as he watched Jo leave. Meredith and Alex locked eyes.

"Alex, I'm really sorry this is happening to you," Meredith said calmly. "But you've got to believe me when I tell you this. I only found out yesterday, and when I did find out, I told Izzie that she had to tell you. It wasn't my place to tell you. It was hers."

"Okay, okay," Alex rolled his eyes.

"You shouldn't have had to find out like that," Meredith said.

He scowled, rolling his brown eyes. "You think?" He ran his hand across his forehead.

She carefully touched his shoulder. "It's going to be okay."

"Is it?" He pushed her hand away. "I'm not so sure about that. Every time it seems like my life is on track, every time I think I've met the one, something gets fucked up. I can't lose her. Not again."

Meredith didn't know if Alex was talking about Jo or Izzie, and she was afraid to ask.

"It's not fair to Jo," Alex continued. "It's not fair at all. What would you do if that Rose chick that Derek dated when you were separated showed up with his kid in tow? What would _you _do, Mer?"

Meredith's eyes widened. She remembered that Derek had told her Rose had lied to him about being pregnant just to see his reaction. _What if she wasn't lying? _She pushed the thought out of her head immediately. She didn't want to think of the possibility that there might be another mini Derek Shepherd out there. The only mini Derek Shepherd in the world was her son.

"I don't know," she said hoarsely. "He's my husband, so I'd support him, of course. But Derek never loved Rose," Meredith stated, or at least that's what he'd assured her many times and she chose to believe. If he'd loved Rose, he wouldn't have thrown her to the side of the curb after Meredith had built him the house of candles. He hadn't even thought twice about breaking up with Rose. "You loved Izzie, didn't you, Alex?"

Alex was quiet before responding quietly, "She was my first love." A tear rolled down his cheek. "And now I don't what to do. I love Jo so much. I don't want to hurt her."

"Wait," Meredith said carefully. "You're not thinking about leaving Jo for Izzie, are you?"

"I love Jo," Alex said. "But seeing Izzie brings back so many memories." He wiped a tear from his cheek. "I don't know what to do, Mer. I don't. Jo gets me. She gets me in ways that Izzie never did and never could. Izzie hurt me bad. It took me years to mend, and now that I've finally moved on, here she is. It's her M.O. It's what she does."

"Alex, stop," Meredith said. She checked her phone. Ten minutes had passed since she'd last texted Cristina. "Come with me." She grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the supply closet and headed toward the cafeteria.

Cristina was already devouring her salad when Alex and Meredith entered the cafeteria.

"Well, there you are, Mer. I was beginning to think you'd stood me up," Cristina said, looking up from her plate. She then locked eyes with Alex. "What's up, Evil Spawn? You look like roadkill."

"Oh, thanks, because I feel like roadkill," Alex responded dryly.

Then Cristina's mouth rounded as she turned toward Meredith. "Izzie told him, didn't she?"

"Oh, come on, you told her, Mer?" Alex scowled and he rose his voice. "Who the hell else knows in this hospital? Apparently everyone but me!" Silence beckoned within the cafeteria for a moment as everyone now had their eyes on Alex. The silence was followed by distinct whispers.

"I wanted to tell you, but Mer made me promise not to," Cristina said, stuffing her face with food.

"Cristina," Meredith hissed, not happy that she was making the situation worse.

"Nobody else knows, that I know of. I mean, I didn't tell anyone else. I didn't even tell Derek. He knows Izzie's back, but he doesn't know about Blake. Well, he knows about Blake, but he doesn't know he's yours." She looked at Cristina. "You didn't tell anyone else, did you?"

Cristina shook her head. "Nope."

"And keep it that," Alex said roughly and turned around, storming out of the cafeteria.

"Alex! Where are you going?" Meredith called after him. He didn't respond. Meredith looked at Cristina. "You could've been a little more supportive. He just found out he has a kid he didn't know about."

"No can do. Remember I'm an evil monster?" Cristina rolled her eyes and laughed fiendishly.

"Cristina, can we not do this?" Meredith asked desperately. She remembered when Cristina had asked Meredith when she'd become such a monster to her during their last fight while they were getting fitted for April's wedding. "I don't want to fight with you anymore."

"It was supposed to be a joke," Cristina said. "Sheesh, don't take everything so personally."

Meredith rolled her eyes. _Because that's all I do. Take everything personally. _Meredith bit her lip. She didn't want to instigate another fight with Cristina. It was getting old; Cristina putting words in her mouth. It was true. They were drifting apart.

"You know, maybe this was a bad idea," Cristina said carefully.

"Maybe you're right," Meredith said, checking the time on her phone. She had thirty minutes to get to the airport. "You know, I have to pick Derek up at the airport. I should go pick up the kids. We'll talk later, okay?"

"Yeah, sure," Cristina said with a hint of doubt in her voice.

Meredith's stomach was still rumbling, so she grabbed a sandwich to go and ate it on the way to the Attendings' lounge, where she found April and Jackson eating each other's faces for lunch. They were so into their meals that they apparently failed to notice Meredith enter the room.

"You do realize this isn't an on-call room, right?" she teased. They both flinched and fell apart from each other's mouths.

"Oh, God, Mer-" April stumbled. Her cheeks flushed the color of her hair.

Meredith shrugged. "Nothing I haven't seen already."

"Let's go, April," Jackson said, grabbing April's hand, then whispered in Meredith's ear as he left, "Um, I'd appreciate if you didn't say anything about to, uh, anyone. Especially Webber, because he'd tell my mom. And, um, I'm on already sort of in deep water as is."

Jackson's mother had been pissed when she found out about what her son had done at April's wedding. She deemed it very unprofessional, for a board member _and _the grandson of Harper Avery to make such a fool of himself in front of so many of his co-workers, people he saw every day.

"I won't say a word, though I'd highly advise against sucking face in the Attendings' lounge if you don't want word to get back to Mama Avery. It's not the most private of places." Meredith smiled, and watched as the happy couple left. "Kids today," she said out loud and rolled her eyes.

She changed out of her scrubs and picked the kids up from daycare. Meredith wasn't surprised to find Alex standing outside the daycare window, watching the kids play, when she was on her way out with Zola and Bailey. He appeared dumbstruck.

"Uncle Alex!" Zola cheered and gave Alex a hug. "I misseded you!"

Alex faked a smile for the little girl. "Why, I missed you too, Miss Zola." He locked eyes with Meredith. She could tell he was hurting.

"You okay?" Meredith asked. Alex shook his head.

"He looks like me," Alex whispered. "It's almost creepy how much he looks like me." He let go of Zola and looked through the window. "Watching him...I feel like I'm looking at old photographs of me."

"Have you talked to him?" Meredith asked.

Alex shook his head. "Izzie dropped him off at daycare before she told me. He hasn't met me yet. What am I supposed to do? Walk in there and say, 'Hi, buddy. I'm your dad.'"

"You're in a tough place," Meredith replied. "But you'll figure it out. You always do."

Alex's eyes were set on the little guy, who was playing with Legos with Sofia.

"I want custody of him," Alex said. "Izzie has to give me partial custody of him, doesn't she?"

"You'll have to talk to her about that," Meredith said, Bailey weighing down on her shoulder. "I have to go pick up Derek." She set her free hand on Alex's shoulder. "It's going to be okay."

As she left, she saw Arizona heading toward the daycare. Meredith figured she was on her way to the airport as well. She didn't stop to talk to Arizona, though.

She'd texted Amelia to tell her that she was taking the kids to pick up Derek at the airport. Meredith hadn't bothered tracking Amelia down. Frankly, she thought it was better that she pick Derek up without Amelia. Then she could have a little time with her family before absolute chaos broke out.

The kids were excited, especially Zola. On the ride to the airport, all she talked about was how she couldn't wait to see Daddy. She talked about Daddy taking her fishing, and helping her play doctor, and having a tea party with her. Meredith was glad that she was excited to see Derek, but she was a little sad too. Zola used to be so close to her. She was a Mommy's girl. But she felt like the past few months, the months she'd dedicated to work, had caused her to drift apart from her daughter. And honestly, it scared her. Zola's words were innocent now. But what would happen in a few years when Zola resented her for working instead of going to her dance recitals? Meredith didn't want that to happen.

They arrived five minutes before the plane was scheduled to land. Meredith took the kids to the window so they could watch the planes land.

"Your daddy's going to be on one of those planes," Meredith told Zola and Bailey.

"Will we see him step off?" Zola asked eagerly.

"No, sweetie. He has to walk through the magical tunnel first, then he'll meet us in here," Meredith explained.

"Boo!" Meredith jumped at the high-pitched voice from behind. She swung around to see Arizona holding Sofia's hand. Zola hugged Sofia. "I tried to catch you, but you were walking too fast. I was gonna say, you could ride to the airport with Sofia and me."

"I don't think there'd be room in either of our cars for Callie, Derek, and the three kids," Meredith commented.

"Oh, right," Arizona said. She looked out the window and watched as a plane landed. "Do you think that's their plane?"

Meredith looked at the Arrivals board in front of them. She saw the flight from HNL (Honolulu International Airport) change to _Arrived. _The flight right below HNL was DCA (Reagan International Airport). It had taken off at 11:45 a.m. Eastern time. It was still in the air.

Meredith's heart pounded in her chest as moments passed, and the status of her husband's flight hadn't changed.

Twenty minutes passed.

Flights came in and out, but the status of the DCA flight didn't change. She looked at Arizona. She could sense the panic in Arizona's face as well.

"Mommy, where's Daddy?" Zola tugged on Meredith's hand.

"Where Mommy?" Sofia whimpered.

"They're still on their way," Arizona explained, putting a smile on her face for the kids. "Right, Meredith?"

"Yeah," Meredith said. "They'll be here in any minute."

Both Zola and Sofia were too young to remember the crash that had claimed Sofia's dad's and Zola's aunt's lives. Memories of that crash still haunted Arizona's and Meredith's thoughts, though. The memories especially terrorized them since both of their spouses supposedly still in the air right now and the statuses of their planes had not changed on the board, even though should have already arrived.

_Maybe their flights were delayed, _Meredith hoped as she nervously approached the front desk. "Excuse me," she said, her heart pounded fiercely in her chest. "Can you tell me the status of a flight from Washington D.C.? It was supposed to land twenty minutes ago."

_Oh, God, _she thought. _This can't be happening. _

Hope for the best. Expect the worst.

* * *

**A/N2: Dun, dun dun… cliffy! **

**This chapter was actually written entirely before 10x13 aired. I know Mertina are on the mend, and I'm certainly happy about that. Still, I feel like words were said that couldn't be taken back and they'll never be as close as they were before - which I was trying to show with this chapter. Cristina was making a joke, but Meredith thought she was making a reference to their fight, even though she wasn't. It just shows how much they've grown apart and don't know each other as well anymore. Don't worry, there will still be happy Mertina moments in this fanfic. :) And yes, Cristina will leave eventually. :'(**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Anyone else still high on MerDer feels from 10x14? I know I am! I've re-watched the last scene probably one hundred times already.**

* * *

The woman at the desk was staring worriedly at her computer screen. Meredith's heart felt like it was going to burst out of her chest. Arizona put her hand on Meredith's shoulder. Arizona's face was terror-struck as well. Little Sofia had already lost one parent to aircraft.

"Mama, what wrong?" Zola whimpered, tugging at her mother's shirt.

"Uh," Meredith stumbled to find words to convince her three-year-old that everything would be all right. Everything _had _to be all right. There had to be a decent explanation as to why Derek and Callie's flight had not yet landed. There just had to be. _She wasn't ready to be a widow. _Derek had to be all right. "We're just trying to find your daddy, Love Bug."

"Is Daddy okay?" She didn't want to lie to Zola; the last thing wanted was for something to be wrong and then have to explain to her little girl that something catastrophic had happened. Meredith couldn't even begin to fathom telling Zola that she would never see her father again. Zola would then resent her for lying to her for the rest of the life.

"I don't know, baby. I hope so."

"You said he be here already," Zola pointed out.

Meredith's heart sunk in her chest. She'd _already _lied to Zola, even though not intentionally. She'd actually believed Derek would be here by now. He was supposed to be here already. Meredith would never intentionally lie to her daughter.

"I thought he would be," Meredith told the three-year-old and murmured under her breath, "He was supposed to be."

"I'm sure everything's all right, girls," Arizona chipped in; she pulled off her usual happy demeanor. Meredith didn't know how Arizona could look _so _happy, even when she wasn't. After all the terrible things that had happened to Arizona this past year, including losing her leg, she managed to put on a show, like she was happy. Meredith had never been that bright and shiny person. In fact, for most of her life, she considered bright and shiny people to be fake. Nobody was _that _happy, were they?

She didn't know if Arizona was fake. She didn't know much about Arizona at all. Other than she cheated on Callie last spring, but that was none of her business. Meredith didn't even want to fathom Derek cheating on her. After Owen had cheated on Cristina, she made Derek promise to never cheat on her. Meredith was sure she would never be able to forgive him if he did.

Yet Cristina had forgiven Owen, and Callie had apparently forgiven Arizona. It wasn't Meredith's place to judge. She just hoped she would never be in that situation.

She trusted Derek. Or at least she tried to. She couldn't help but be jealous from time to time. Admittedly, it did bother her that Derek followed and liked Addison's Instagram photos, but she knew it shouldn't matter. Addison had moved on too. She was all the way in Los Angeles, and Derek was with Meredith.

_It didn't matter._

Who her husband followed on Instagram wasn't a priority now, though. Her biggest priority was seeing her husband land safely.

"Ah, here we are," the woman behind the desk said. "Hm, that's odd."

"What?" Meredith's heart jumped.

"It looks like the flight from DCA landed twenty minutes ago. I'm not sure why…"

"Meredith?" Meredith jumped when she heard her husband's voice from behind. She twirled around and saw Derek holding his suitcase. Her face lit up.

"Daddy!" Zola cried and ran over to Derek. Derek set his suitcase down and scooped his daughter into his arms. "I missed you!"

"I missed you too, Zo." Derek kissed Zola's forehead. Meredith walked over to Derek with her son in her arms. His eyes sparkled in the light and he locked eyes with his wife. He opened his arms and embraced his wife and son in his arms. He kissed Meredith's cheek and then gave Bailey a peck on the forehead. "I think you have grown, Bails." His eyes widened.

"What about me Daddy?" Zola asked, standing up straight, arching her back. "Have I growed?"

Derek laughed, and put his hand on Zola's head. "I think so, baby girl."

"Yay!" Zola clapped. "I growed!"

Derek chuckled, and his eyes aimlessly wandered around the airport. "Where's Amy?" he asked his wife.

"Oh, she's at the hospital," Meredith said, holding back the detail that Hunt had offered his sister a position at Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital. She would save that detail for atr. Derek raised his eyebrows and met eyes with Arizona.

"W-Where's Call-"

"Arizona! Sofia!" Callie appeared, rolling her suitcase.

"Momma!" Sofia cried and met her mother with a hug.

"I was worried about you," Arizona said, giving Callie a kiss on the cheek. "Apparently the arrivals board was broken, because it didn't say that your plane had landed. Of course we thought the worst." Arizona looked at Meredith, who nodded, gazing at Derek. She studied his face closely. The wrinkles under his eyelids were visible; he looked tired and worn out, but his eyes dazzled when he looked at his family. Meredith felt the tension in her body release, now knowing her husband was safe on the ground and had come back to her, Zola, and Bailey-for now. She dreaded the thought of him leaving again, the thought of going through what she'd just gone through again, going through that every single time Derek traveled did not seem appealing. And it wouldn't get easier. Every time her husband got on a plane, every time she dropped him off at the airport, she would wonder if he would return safely.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Callie frowned then shrugged, "Well, we made it here in one piece, and I have to say, I don't ever think I want to do _that _again. I can't handle being away from my wife and baby for so long." She scooped Sofia into her arms, and looked at Derek. "It was hard, wasn't it?"

Derek nodded, wrapping one arm around Meredith and Bailey. "It was." Meredith leaned in and pressed her lips against Derek's cold cheek. She pressed her nose against his stubble and felt the rough patches prick her nose. She personally preferred him to be clean shaven, but she knew that he liked to have a little stubble. Often times he wouldn't shave unless she said something. There were times Meredith suspected he only shaved for her, which she thought was sweet. She just loved when his face was smooth and silky.

"So, I was thinking," Callie began. "Since we're all _here _already, why don't we go grab dinner together? I was thinking p-i-z-z-a." She winked, since neither Sofia nor Zola could spell yet. Both could sing their ABCs, though. It wouldn't be long before the girls started reading too. Zola loved to be read to and had memorized _Cinderella _and a few other children's books. She liked to "read" them out loud.

"Sounds great!" Arizona chirped, smiling toward Meredith and Derek. Meredith frowned as she studied Derek's face. He looked deep in thought.

"_Pwease,_" Zola tugged at Derek's hand. Derek shook his head, and looked at Meredith with sad eyes.

"Actually, Daddy needs to go to work for a little bit," Derek gently told Zola.

"Oh, come on," Callie scowled, rolling her eyes. "You _just _got back from D.C., and you already need to go to the hospital? Derek, what could you possibly need to do at the hospital? You should be spending time with your family and relaxing for a few hours before even _thinking _about stepping foot inside that hospital."

"I have work to get done," Derek protested.

Zola stuck her lip out. "But, Daddy, you _gots _to go. I misses you." Zola tugged on her daddy's hand, and Derek let out a sigh.

"Derek, what work could you possibly have to do that's more important than your family?" Callie insisted. Zola crossed her arms together and stuck her lower lip out. For a three-year-old, she could be so sassy.

"I happen to have a very important patient to check on," Derek told Callie. He kneeled on one knee and placed his hand on Zola's shoulder. "I know you've missed me, baby girl, and I've missed you too. I'll make it up to you tonight, I promise. We'll have a tea party, and you can dress Daddy up as a princess. How's that sound?" Zola's arms were still crossed together, and finally she released a reluctant sigh.

"Okay," Zola said. "But you is wearing the pink pwincess crown."

Derek laughed. "Okay, it's a deal, sweetheart." A year ago, the pink crown was Zola's favorite, but her grandmother had gotten her a new silver crown with purple gems for Christmas. It was now her favorite, and she didn't like the pink one anymore.

Meredith tilted her head. She knew that Derek didn't want to stop by the hospital to check on a patient. In fact, his reasoning for wanting to go to the hospital _was _family-related. He wanted to talk to his sister in person. And she didn't blame him. They did need to talk, and he deserve to know his sister's real intentions for coming to Seattle.

Meredith exhaled, and patted Zola's head. "How about this," Meredith began her proposal, looking in her daughter's chocolate brown eyes. "Why don't you go with Aunt Callie, Aunt Arizona, and Sofia to dinner, and your daddy and I will pick you up later? And we'll all have a princess tea party together."

"You're not coming, either, Mer?" Callie asked with disappointment in her voice.

Meredith shook her head, looking at Derek. "Derek and I have some things we need to take care of…" Her eyes turned to Arizona. Meredith frowned, "His sister's in town."_ And she's a patient of Arizona's. _Meredith bit her lip. Arizona's blue eyes widened.

"Oh, right!" Arizona gasped. "Hey, no problem. You two go ahead. We'll take Bailey, too. You can pick them up at our place later."

Meredith's mouth rounded. "A-Are you sure?" she asked, hugging her son. "I mean, two kids can be a handful. Are you sure you're up for three? I mean, Bailey's teething and everything. He can be a little cranky at times…" Bailey was gently sucking on his blue pacifier, quiet as a bee.

Callie looked at Arizona, and she smiled. "Arizona's right. It's no big deal." She opened her arms and took Bailey from Meredith's arms. "Hey, little guy! It's your Aunt Callie, and you're gonna have a _fun time _with Me, Aunt Arizona, Cousin Sofia, and your big sissy." Bailey immediately started fussing. He reached for his father. Derek sighed.

"I have his teething ring in the car," Meredith offered. She gave her son a kiss on the forehead. "It's gonna be okay, baby."

Meredith's heart ached as she handed Bailey's diaper bag and car seat to Callie and Arizona. She handed Bailey his teething ring, which settled him down almost immediately. She released a sigh of relief, but the fact that he wasn't crying anymore didn't make her feel any less horrible. They both said goodbye to the kids and watched as Callie and Arizona settled the kids in their car. She started to tear up.

"Are you crying?" Derek asked as he opened the door of the driver's side. She glared at him and he shrugged. "I've been relying on the Metro and taxis for three days. I'm driving." She threw the keys at his face. "Ouch," Derek mouthed. "If you really want to drive…"

"How can you act like it's no big deal?" Meredith spat, opening the passenger's door and sitting down. Derek sat in driver's seat and stuck the key in the ignition and turned on the car. "You've been gone for days. All Zola has talked about is her daddy, then you come back and...you abandon them. And the worst part is I'm going with you. They're going to resent us when they're older. Zola's at an age where she's going to start remembering these things!" Meredith set her head in her palms and wept.

"Meredith," Derek said calmly as he began driving. "Do you really think that twenty years from now Zola is going to remember her mom and dad leaving her at the airport with her best friend? No, she's going to remember the great time she had with her best friend, Sofia. Those are the kind of memories she's going to cherish."

Meredith's nose rattled as she inhaled snot. She nodded. "You're right. She's lucky to have a friend her own age. I wish I'd had someone my own age to play with when I was her age. I-I just don't want to turn into my mother, letting my children be raised by total strangers."

"Meredith, you're not your mother, we've already established that, and Callie and Arizona aren't total strangers," Derek protested. "They're our friends. They're like family. Zola calls them her aunts. They're not random nannies."

Meredith nodded. There had been a point in her life that she had a new nanny every couple months. It had been infuriating as a child, and she would never put her children through that horror. Some nannies were nice. Some weren't. Everyone had their own set of rules. Some let her eat ice cream. Some took her to the park. Others were on the phone with their boyfriends all day and didn't pay any attention to her. Each time she had a new nanny it was a guessing game. Would she be nice, or would she be evil? She couldn't imagine putting Zola and Bailey through that.

"We won't be at the hospital long," insisted Derek. "I'll walk in there, find Amelia, find out what she wants, and then we'll go pick up the kids from Callie and Arizona's. Just enough time for the kids to eat pizza and have a little fun. Okay, Meredith?"

She clenched her teeth together. "Uh, what makes you think that Amelia _wants _something?"

Derek laughed. "Because she's Amelia. She doesn't just casually come visit me. I don't know what she told you, but her coming here to _help _me is a cover up for something else. I know my sister. She wants something, because that's how Amelia works."

Meredith swallowed. "Um, Derek, there's something you should know…"

"What's that?" Derek quickly glanced at Meredith while keeping one eye on the road.

"Hunt offered Amelia a position at the hospital." Meredith felt the words escape her mouth, and she prepared herself for Derek's reaction.

Derek instantly stomped on the brakes even though the light was green. The resistance from her seat belt securely forced her back into her seat as she jolted forward and the belt tightened, digging into her shoulder and stomach. She was fortune she'd remembered to put the seat belt on, otherwise she was sure she would have flown through the window. Before she'd had children, she was admittedly guilty of forgetting to wear a seatbelt. Now she always did, because she wanted to set a good example for her children.

Luckily, there were no cars behind them. "He what?" Derek's bright blue eyes flashed toward his wife. Meredith could see the hostility in her husband's face as he hotly glared at her.

Meredith swallowed, her cheeks burned. "I-I guess Hunt fired Nelson, or that's what Amelia told me anyway."

"I am going to kill Hunt." Derek gritted his teeth together tightly.

"No, you're not. Now, drive. We're five minutes from the hospital," Meredith insisted, motioning for her husband to take his foot off the brake.

Derek exhaled, and the car slowly started to move again.

"You don't have any other surprises for me, Meredith, do you? Because if you do, you better tell me now, before I storm into that hospital and demand Hunt fire Amelia immediately."


	16. Chapter 16

Meredith twiddled her thumbs as she looked at herself in the car's side mirror. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail. She hadn't had time to do anything special with it that morning, especially after her shower time had been abruptly interrupted. Her bangs dangled sloppily in her face. She wasn't wearing eyeliner or mascara. She felt like her age was showing. Meredith had always believed in natural beauty. She wasn't keen on eyeliner and foundation. But after Bailey was born, she started to notice the dark circles and wrinkles under her eyelids. She'd spent five years as a surgical resident, years full of sleepless nights. At least she could sleep on her days off, though, if she chose to. Meredith hadn't truly experienced a sleepless _week _and _month _until she'd encountered the joy of having a newborn in her care. Newborns were unpredictable. She never knew when Bailey was going to wake up. Now, he mostly slept through the night, but what kept her awake at night the fact she didn't know _if _he was going to wake up. And what if he woke up, she was asleep, and didn't hear his cries? That's what worried her. So she often lay awake at night, waiting to hear his cries.

It'd gotten better in recent weeks, but she still felt like all the sleepless nights had imprinted on her skin. She looked weary all the time, so she'd started wearing more make-up, more foundation, and more eyeliner, in hopes of hiding away the wrinkles. To erase a few years off her face.

Derek always told her she looked beautiful, whether she wore make-up or not, but she wasn't sure she believed him. After all, he was her husband. He was supposed to make her feel better, not worse.

Meredith's stomach twisted into knots. She thought about telling Derek the truth about Amelia. She'd held off telling him for this long, though, and she'd told Amelia that she could tell him. Besides, it wasn't really _her _place to spring this on Derek. It was Amelia's.

"You just need to talk to your sister," Meredith told Derek. "Seriously, Derek, don't go to Owen. She's your sister, for God's sake. Give her a break."

"You know something," Derek said suspiciously as he pulled into the hospital parking lot. "See, I knew it wasn't just about Amelia wanting to help out. She told you what she wants, didn't she?" He parked the car, and took the keys out of the ignition. While they were still in the car, he turned toward his wife. "Just tell me, Meredith. Tell me what you know."

"You really need to talk to Amelia," Meredith replied quietly.

"Mmm." Derek opened the car door. Meredith was beginning to wish she'd gone with Callie, Arizona, and the kids, but she knew this was something she and Derek needed to face together. It involved them both. Meredith knew Derek was going to be angry with her for not telling him everything from the beginning, but in the end, Meredith figured, he would be more upset with Amelia once he found out the truth. They were walking into the hospital side-by-side, and Derek stopped and turned to his wife. "She knew I was in D.C., didn't she? She came here to talk to _you_ first because she, whatever it is, it would freak me out. She's using you to get what she wants out of me, isn't she?"

Meredith didn't say anything.

"Meredith, is it true?"

Meredith mumbled, admitting, "She saw your post on Instagram."

"She always was conniving," Derek hissed and moved toward Owen's office.

"Derek!" Meredith called after him, but he proceeded to barge into Chief Hunt's office. Meredith ran after her husband. "Don't-"

Owen was sitting at his desk, apparently buried in paperwork. He looked up as Derek and Meredith entered the room.

"Derek, you're ba-"

"Where is she?" Derek demanded. "Where is my sister? I hear you've hired her, without consulting me first."

"I didn't realize I had to consult _you _before making hiring decisions for _my _staff," Owen answered.

"It's my department," Derek retorted. "I'm Head of Neurosurgery. I think I should at least have a say in who is part of _my _department."

"Well, I don't remember you caring before." Owen said, and he looked at Meredith. Meredith shrugged and rolled her eyes.

"Where is she? Where's Amy?" Derek demanded again. He folded his arms again.

"Derek," Meredith said quietly.

"She's in surgery," Owen said. "If I were you, and I wanted to talk to a colleague, I would recommend paging her. It usually works better than barging into the chief's office and demanding he tell you where she is."

"Okay, that's not fair," Derek retorted.

"You of all people should know life's not fair," Owen answered. "Now get the Hell out of my office, Shepherd, before I have to fire one of the Shepherds on my staff, and it's _not _going to be her."

"You can't fire me," Derek said. "I'm on the board, _and _my long distance consulting with the president is bringing millions to this hospital. You wouldn't."

"Oh, I wouldn't bet on it. Get out, Shepherd."

"Come on, Derek," Meredith grabbed Derek's hand. "Come on." Derek sighed reluctantly and left Owen's office with her.

"He was bluffing," Derek said furiously. "He wouldn't fire me."

"I know," Meredith said calmly, wrapping her arm around Derek's lower back and leaning into him. "I know." She rubbed his back gently and felt his lungs exhale as he released a sigh. She moved her hand up to his chest, where she could feel his heart racing through the cloth of his cotton blue polo shirt. "Relax, Derek," she said. "It's not going to do you any good to approach Amelia when you're like this. Anger has never gotten you far." She guided him into the empty Attendings' lounge, where they both took a seat on the couch.

He nodded. "You're right," he admitted. "But how does she expect me to react? I leave for D.C. for a few days, and I come back to find out my sister's in town and didn't bother to tell me that she was coming? Plus, on top of that, she's taken a job at _my hospital, _again without even telling me? Does she expect me to welcome her with open arms? It'd be different if she'd contacted me herself."

"Would it, though?" Meredith inquired, and saw Derek's dark eyebrow raise. "I mean, would you have answered your phone?"

"Of course I would," Derek insisted. "It's not like we were on bad terms, at least before. We exchanged emails every now and then. She sent me patient scans occasionally when she didn't know what to do, and I'd offer her suggestions."

"Mmm," Meredith murmured. "Do you do that with Addison?"

"Huh?"

"Nothing, it's just...something Amelia said…"

"Oh, God, Meredith. What did my little sister say now?" Derek let out an obnoxious sigh.

"Well, it's not really what she said. It's what she knew. She seemed to know an awful lot about what's been going on here in Seattle, and she implied that you and Addison were still in contact…"

"We're still friends," Derek admitted like it was nothing. "Does that bother you? I mean, we don't talk _that _often. Every now and then. She sends me scans sometimes, too."

"You favorited her selfie on Instagram," Meredith pointed out.

"Her what?"

"Selfie—it's modern terminology for _self-portrait_. I was posting a picture of the kids, and I saw you'd favorited some of her photos…"

Derek laughed. "I don't even know _how _to favorite a picture on Instagram. I was scrolling through the pictures that appeared on my account. I did see some pictures she'd posted, but if I _favorite _them like you say, it was on accident."

"Oh," Meredith chuckled lightly. She placed her hand on his upper thigh and gazed into his dreamy, but tired looking, blue eyes. He let out a sigh and covered her small, bony hand with his large hand. His had skin had warmed up since they'd left the airports, perhaps because of the blood that throbbed through his veins as his anger thrived. The warmth from his skin radiated against hers.

"Like I said, Addison and I are only friends. Nothing more. If that bothers you—"

"Oh, it doesn't," Meredith cut in, placing her other hand on top of his. She leaned in closer to him. "I get it. You were married for twelve years. Obviously she's always going to be part of your life, and that's great. In fact, maybe I should shoot her an email or something. We're all adults. No reason why we can't all be friends."

She half smiled, and she knew it was true. She hadn't considered Addison a threat in a long time; after all, she was all the way in L.A. now, and even so, Derek was in love with Meredith. He was the father of their children. Addison was nothing more than his ex-wife who was also his friend. There wasn't anything wrong with being civil with an ex. People did it all the time.

"YOU COULDN'T HAVE PICKED UP THE PHONE _ONCE _IN FOUR YEARS TO TELL ME ABOUT MY SON?" The screams were coming from outside the Attendings' lounge. Meredith looked over at Derek, whose eyes widened. They took their hands off each other.

"Seriously, Alex? Lower your voice! The whole hospital doesn't need to know our business!" Izzie's voice shrieked. "And I'm sorry! I know should have called. Believe me, I wanted to, but don't forget _you _were the one who told me to go. You said you deserved better than me. What was I supposed to do?"

"YOU LEFT!" Alex left. "YOU DIDN'T SAY A DAMN WORD. YOU JUST LEFT. HOW DID YOU EXPECT ME TO REACT? YOU WAITED UNTIL I WAS ACTUALLY MOVING ON TO COME BACK. SOUNDS LIKE YOUR M.O. I MEAN LOOK AT YOU. I'M HAPPY. I'VE FINALLY FOUND FIXED WHAT YOU BROKE. I GOT MY LIFE BACK ON TRACK, AND I'M IN LOVE. THEN YOU COME MARCHING BACK INTO THIS HOSPITAL, TO SCREW EVERYTHING UP."

"I never asked you for a thing!" Izzie cried. "I never asked you to support your son. I never asked you for money. I didn't even know you still worked here when I accepted the job! You don't have to associate with me."

"YOU SERIOUSLY EXPECT US TO WORK IN THIS HOSPITAL AND ACT LIKE WE DON'T HAVE A CHILD? YOU'RE A LUNATIC, AREN'T YOU?"

"Alex, stop! You're making a fool of yourself. We could go talk somewhere more private…"

"HAH, LIKE THAT'S EVER GOING TO HAPPEN. LEAVE ME ALONE, IZZIE. DON'T TALK TO ME AGAIN. I'M GETTING A DAMN LAWYER, AND I'M GONNA GET CUSTODY OF BLAKE. HE NEEDS A PARENT WHO'S NOT GOING TO LIE TO HIM EVERY DAY OF HIS LIFE."

The door swung open, and an infuriated Alex entered the Attendings' lounge. He looked at Meredith and Derek on the couch and rolled his eyes. Alex opened the refrigerator and took out a Coke and plopped his ass on a chair on the other side of the lounge, then opened the can and took a sip of the soda pop.

"Do you want to talk?" Meredith asked quietly.

Alex shook his head. "Nope."

Meredith nodded in understanding, and she got off the couch and went over and set her hand on Alex's shoulder. "It's going to be okay." She noticed tears welling in Alex's eyes, but it was obvious that he was fighting them. "It'll be okay, Alex." He shook his head and finally let loose, as tears started to stream down his cheeks.

Meredith gently rubbed his back to comfort him.

"So you've already said," Alex crossly replied, pushing her hand away.

Derek's phone beeped. He looked down at his phone. "It's Amelia. I texted her and told her to text me when she was out of surgery. She's on her way here."

"I'm out of here," Alex muttered harshly, taking his soda with him as he left the lounge.

"Do I want to know?" Derek asked after Alex had left the room.

Meredith shook her head. "Remember Izzie's son that you heard in the background last night?" Derek nodded. "Well, uh, he's Alex's."

"Wow," Derek's eyes widened and he mouthed, "Poor Alex. I'm beginning to think I've missed a lot, and that's just being in D.C. for four days."

Meredith solemnly nodded, "Oh, you have." She walked back over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. "You might want to consider not leaving for such long periods of time."

His pearly white teeth broke through his sweet smile. "I think you're right." He pulled her in closer to him and embraced her as she fell into his lap and their lips collided. His hands gently grasped onto her hips. His soft lips worked their way down her neck, and she giggled as his lips touched the sensitive spot on her collarbone. In that moment, her nerves were on fire. She'd missed him so much. Her heart began to race, and just for a moment, she felt like everything was normal again. Whatever normal was, anyway. She was just enjoying being in Derek's arms again.

Then the door swung open again. Amelia walked through the door while Meredith was still on Derek's lap. She was wearing her baggy navy blue scrubs and her white coat; her baby bump was well hidden at that moment.

"Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to interrupt you two again," Amelia said with a teasing smirk on her face.

"You're not interrupting anything," Meredith responded slyly, having not forgotten that Amelia had seen her completely naked the night before as she slid into the seat next to Derek. She looked at her husband, whose smile had faded as he observed his little sister enter the lounge. Meredith felt a little hypocritical, because it was only a few hours ago she'd chewed April and Jackson out for swapping spit in the lounge. April and Jackson had been having a heated make-out session, though. She'd just shared a tender moment with her husband whom she'd not seen in several days.

"Uh-huh," Amelia raised her eyebrows and peered toward Derek. "Well, big bro, aren't you gonna say hi to your little sis and give her a hug?"

Derek crossed his arms as he gave his sister a very stern look. "Maybe after you tell me what you're really doing here, Amy. I hear Hunt offered you a position."

Amelia's blue eyes narrowed toward Meredith and then she turned back to her brother. "Did you, now?" Her voice deepened with curiosity. "What else have you heard?"

"Not a whole lot, now take a seat, Amy, and spill," Derek demanded with a smile on his face. The pressure of Meredith's bladder pushed against her stomach causing it to ache. Ever since she'd given birth to her son, her ability to hold onto her pee had weakened tremendously. She stood up and began heading toward the door. Derek reacted quickly, grabbing her hand. "Where do you think you're going, Meredith?"

"Bathroom. I have to pee," Meredith gasped, trying to break away from Derek but his grip was too tight.

"Oh, you're not going anywhere. Sit down," Derek laughed as he pulled her back to the couch and set her next to him.

"But I have to pee!" Meredith protested, crossing her legs so urine didn't spill into her pants.

"I always have to pee after sex too," Amelia nodded exasperating a sigh like she'd not divulged anything personal at all.

Meredith's jaw dropped. "Amelia!" she spat. "We were fully clothed, and God, I think this is one of the only rooms in the hospital we _haven't _had sex, not that it's any of your business, but this is the _Attendings' _lounge." She nudged Derek and whispered, "And you used to think _I _was pervy for a girl." Derek chuckled at that comment.

"Hey, sorry, I grew up with Derek as my only role model. My sisters were all busy chasing boys, getting married, and having kids of their own by the time I came along. You can blame Derek for any and all of my flaws and perviness," Amelia insisted with a smirk on her face.

"Her first word was sex," admitted Derek, with a sigh. "Mom was _not _happy with me."

Meredith's eyes opened wide. "How much older are you?"

"Seven years," Derek replied.

"He was eight," added Amelia. "And you wonder why I'm so corrupted."

"Derek!" Meredith scolded.

She suddenly wasn't so sure how comfortable she felt about Amelia being alone with her kids. If Zola suddenly started saying inappropriate words, Meredith would immediately know who to suspect. How much damage was already done?

Then again, Meredith hadn't gotten this dirty vibe off Amelia until Derek had gotten home. Surely she was just acting like this because he was her brother, and she had in fact walked in on them doing dirty things the night before. Meredith still couldn't believe that _her husband _had taught his baby sister to say the word "sex" when he was eight years old. That didn't sound like the Derek she knew, who was so amazing with kids. The Derek who wouldn't even say the word "crap" in front of Zola, because he was afraid she would repeat it. He always substituted it with "poopoo." Meredith found it actually quite adorable. Especially when he was in the middle of saying the word, and he would say "Cra-poopoo."

"But I did not introduce her to drugs," Derek muttered under his breath.

"I heard that!" Amelia hissed.

Meredith nudged Derek and murmured softly in his ear, "I really do have to pee." He was still gripping rather tightly onto her hand.

"You can pee after Amy tells me why she specifically chose to come to Seattle when she knew I was out of town, because I _know _you know why, Meredith," Derek said as he studied his sister. "So, Amy, spill."

"Just tell him," Meredith scowled at her sister-in-law.

And, to both of their surprises, Amelia lifted up her shirt.

Amelia's round bump was in plain sight. Meredith felt Derek's grip on her hand loosen. "Y-You're pregnant?" he asked, and Amelia nodded. "So, you came all the way to Seattle to tell me that you're pregnant in person?" Derek asked as he sprung off the couch and wrapped his arms around his little sister. Amelia's face flushed red and she didn't say anything. "Congratulations, Amy." A tear sprawled in Derek's eye. "I can't believe my baby sister is having a baby."

Meredith raised an eyebrow at Amelia. "Uh-hem," Meredith coughed and squirmed in her seat. She could feel her bladder filling and the pressure against her stomach aching. She didn't know how much longer she could hold it in. "Tell him the rest," she told Amelia, and Amelia frowned.

"Tell me the rest? What? Is everything okay with the baby, Amy?" Derek asked, his concerned eyes perished the sudden joy that had overtaken his face.

"Um, yeah," Amelia said, "other than the fact he has a congenital pulmonary stenosis, but Dr. Yang and Dr. Robbins explained it's not a big deal, and Dr. Robbins will take good care of him once he's born. She seems really nice. A little perky but nice. I bet kids love her."

Derek looked at Meredith, his eyes wide, and he exhaled a sigh. "I thought Arizona looked like she knew something at the airport." Meredith was shaking as she continued to hold in the bladder.

"Tell him the rest," Meredith grunted and clenched her teeth together.

"Um," Amelia sighed. "I was kinda, uh, hoping that you and Meredith would be willing to adopt my baby."

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so I feel really bad for leaving you guys with this cliffy, because I'm leaving for D.C. in a few days and I have a lot to get done still before I leave. I'm not sure if I'll get a chapter out before I leave or not. I may or may not write while I'm in D.C., depending on if I can find the time and how high my muse is for this story. Obviously, it's been pretty high lately. Thank you all for the great feedback, it certainly helps with my muse!**


	17. Chapter 17

Silence. Derek was silent. _Too _silent. Meredith's legs were now crossed together so tightly. She inhaled and exhaled slowly as she waited for Derek's reaction. Goosebumps crawled up her arms. Amelia's face was blank as she stared at her brother; she looked scared, as if she was waiting for him to yell at her.

"Are you gonna say something, Derek?" Amelia finally asked her brother. "I just kinda dropped a bombshell on you, and you're not saying anything. I asked you if you would raise my child."

And it all happened all of a sudden. Derek started to snicker. He proceeded to burst into full-fledged laughter. He was laughing uncontrollably. Meredith locked eyes with Amelia, who shrugged nervously.

"I'm sorry," Derek said as he caught his breath. Tears spilled out of his eye sockets as he tried to control his laughter. "Really, I am. You're not serious, right, Amy? Because if you were…then, I'd have to ask…what the Hell is wrong with you? Have you lost the little common sense left in you? Does Addison know you're here? Because the last time I recall, she was having baby fever. She just adopted a little boy, I'm sure she wouldn't mind raising your kid too."

Amelia rolled her eyes. "See, this _isn't _what I wanted. I knew you'd be an ass about it. That's why I came here to talk to Mer, so I could get her on board and then she could convince you that it's a good idea."

"You obviously do not know my wife very well," Derek said with a snicker. He looked at Meredith. "Right, Meredith?"

Meredith exhaled the air in her lungs. She didn't say anything, but she wasn't sure how much longer she could hold her bladder.

"And what about the baby's dad?" Derek spat at Amelia. "You couldn't come to Christmas out east because you were supposedly with your boyfriend. Is this the same guy who's the kid's father?"

"He doesn't know," Amelia said. "And yes, it's the same guy."

"Then why haven't you told him? Are you still together? Surely you're not, because otherwise you wouldn't have accepted a position so far away from Los Angeles."

Amelia rolled her eyes. "I don't have to answer questions about my personal life to you, Derek. It's none of your business."

"Amelia Christine Shepherd, you just asked me if I would adopt _your _baby. I think I'm entitled to ask questions. I need to know the circumstances, because from my perspective, it looks like you've not thought this through clearly."

Amelia snickered. "_You _want to lecture me about thinking things through? Okay, big brother, who's accepted a position that requires you to travel and be away from your wife and children for days at a time. It doesn't seem like _you _thought through a whole lot before accepting the job, did you, Mr. Bigshot? Of course, it's your M.O. You get bored with one wife, so you distance yourself from her until she gets lonely and tired of you being away, so she cheats. Then you blame her and move across the country and find a younger woman. That's it, isn't it, Derek? That's exactly what you're doing _again_."

Derek froze as he turned his head toward his wife. Meredith's heart pounded. She wanted nothing more than to strangle Amelia right now. Meredith clenched her fists together.

"Take it back," Derek hissed. "You did _not_ just say that."

"You know, unless you want me to pee all over this couch, and I'm pretty sure the rest of the attendings, and the board for that matter, wouldn't be very happy about that because then they'd have to purchase a new couch for the lounge, because no one wants to sit on a couch that's been peed on! So, _I'm _going to the bathroom now." Meredith stood up straight, and she made a dash for the door.

"You know, I have to pee, too," Amelia announced and added, "Baby's pressing on my bladder."

"Oh, come on, you women can't just drop a bombshell like that on me and both run away from me! Meredith, you were just saying yesterday how your hands are full and you don't want more kids right now… you don't actually think…"

Meredith swung around and looked at her husband and she spat, "And you were just talking about how much you'd _love _to have another baby, but I really need to pee right now so that's all that is on my mind right now. I'll be right back and we can all talk about this." She glared at Amelia for a split second. She dashed out of the lounge. Her heart was racing anxiously in her chest as she ran toward the bathroom; she didn't even look back to see if Amelia followed after her. If she did, there was a chance Meredith would find herself pounding her fist into Amelia's skull. Meredith's biggest concern was making it to the bathroom. Amelia and her baby issues were the farthest things from her mind.

She tried not to let what Amelia had said sink in too deep. Derek had said many times how he didn't like being away from her and his family. She knew he'd wanted the job, simply because it was such a prestigious honor, but he didn't like the travel that accompanied it. Amelia had no idea what she was even saying.

She made a run for the first open stall in the bathroom and unbuttoned and pulled down her jeans, breathing a huge sigh of a relief as her bottom hit the toilet and the pee gushed out of her urethra and splashed into the toilet water. She had made it just in time.

Amelia was already washing her hands when Meredith exited the stall. Being a doctor and a mom, hygiene was essential to Meredith. She'd taught Zola to sing _Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star _when she was washing her hands, so she made sure to wash away all the germs. Now, every time Meredith washed her hands, she hummed the song silently in her head.

"So, does this mean you're on my side?" Amelia asked, interrupting Meredith's mental humming of _like a diamond in the sky, _as she turned the water off, and she'd gone over to dry her hands.

Meredith's jaw dropped. "W-what? Excuse me?" What were they, twelve? Meredith didn't consider herself to be on anyone's side. Meredith had lost track of the song, but she decided she'd been scrubbing her hands for long enough. She turned off the faucet and walked toward the blow drier. Just before she placed her hands under the drier to turn on the drier, she heard a weak, nearby sob. Her ears intently focused on the sound. Her eyes wandered around the bathroom, and she heard the sob again; it seemed to be coming from the last stall – the handicapped stall.

"It's just, you didn't deny anything when Derek asked you if you thought it was a good idea and all…"

Meredith didn't respond. She was listening for the sobs.

"Oh, you were right, by the way," Amelia said. "About Katie. It was a subarachnoid hemorrhage again. I was able to operate, and Katie's fine."

"Shush," Meredith hissed, although she was glad that Katie Bryce was all right. "Listen." The sobs echoed through the bathroom. Meredith wiped her hand on her jeans and tiptoed over to the last tall. She looked down and saw tennis shoes. "Is everything okay in there?"

"Go away!" a familiar voice called hoarsely. Meredith knew it too well.

"Izzie?" Meredith whispered. "Open the door."

"Oh, God, Mer?" the stall door slowly opened, and Meredith came face to face with a tear-stained face Izzie. Her eyes were bloodshot red. She looked like she'd been crying for a while, probably since Meredith and Derek had overheard her fighting with Derek. Amelia still was in the corner near the hand drier.

"Dr. Stevens?" Amelia gasped. "Is everything all right?"

"Oh, God. This is so humiliating. I normally don't let patients see me cry. That's why I came in here," Izzie sobbed. Meredith placed her hand on Izzie's back and gently rubbed it.

"Well, I'm not exactly a patient. I work here now too," Amelia said, proudly showing Izzie her new hospital I.D. that Hunt must have had printed for her fairly quickly.

"Right, that doesn't make this any less embarrassing," Izzie said as tears still gushed out of her eyes. "Look, Mer," Izzie said in between cries, wiping the tears off her cheeks, "you don't have to comfort me. I don't deserve your kindness. It's Alex you should be comforting. What I did…was a terrible."

"Iz," Mer said quietly. "I'm not saying it was right, but you did what you thought was best at the time and that's all that really matters."

"Wait, what happened?" Amelia asked, her face overridden with confusion.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Amy, just go. Tell Derek to go pick up the kids, and I'll find a way back to the house," Meredith said, not even realizing she'd just called Amelia _Amy_. According to Derek, he was the only one allowed to call her Amy, although Amelia's name was inputted as _Amy _in Meredith's phone, just because it was shorter and Derek always referred to her as Amy when he talked about her.

Amelia pouted. "You're not seriously making me go back to him alone, are you?"

Meredith's gaze toward Amelia was stern. "Yes, I am. Now go. The kids need some Daddy time, and uh, if you go home with him, please just behave yourself."

"I'm not a child," Amelia protested.

"Could've fooled me," Meredith shrugged, and Amelia stomped out of the bathroom. Meredith shook her head, exasperated a sigh and turned to Izzie. "And she says she's not a child." There were Kleenexes on the edge of the sink. Meredith reached for one and handed it to Izzie so she could dry her eyes.

"She's sure nosy, isn't she?" Izzie asked, actually forcing a smile. Meredith nodded.

"Oh, she is. You have _no _idea."

"I don't know what to do, Mer," Izzie whispered.

"Imagine how Alex feels," Meredith shrugged. She was trying to see both points here, even though it was difficult. Izzie had been her friend, and even though she'd been absent from her life for almost five years, that didn't make her any less her friend. Yes, Meredith had been initially upset about how she'd left and hurt Alex, about how she'd only come back after Meredith had called her to tell her that Alex had started to move on. It wasn't fair to Alex, but it was the past. Izzie obviously needed a support system right now too. This couldn't be easy for her either.

"He said he's going to sue for custody of Blake," Izzie cried frantically. Meredith bit her lip, deciding not to mention that she'd overheard Izzie and Alex fighting in the hallway outside the Attendings' lounge.

"Earlier he told me that he wanted partial custody of Blake," Meredith confessed. She thought back to the brief conversation she'd had with Alex after she'd picked Zola and Bailey up from daycare. It was only a few hours ago, but so much had happened in those few hours. It felt like days ago.

"See, he didn't tell me that," Izzie said. "I'm fine with him seeing Blake. Blake _should _know his dad, and it's fine if Alex wants him on weekend or every other week or whatever. But no, Alex didn't ask for partial custody. He just jumped to I'm a horrible person for hiding this from him, and told me he wants full custody. I can't lose Blake, Mer."

"His mind is clouded right now," said Meredith, rubbing Izzie's back gently. "Once he's let it all sink in, he'll realize that's not going to help the situation."

"That's not going to stop him from getting his lawyers involved now, and totally screwing up everything," Izzie said as she reached for another tissue to wipe the fresh tears off her face. "Oh, God, Mer…and…and…I have my yearly in two weeks. You know, to make sure the cancer hasn't returned. If everything checks out, I'll have been in remission for five years."

"That's great, Izzie!"

"I'm terrified," Izzie confessed, releasing a nasally sigh. "Every yearly is terrifying, but knowing it's been five years makes it just that scarier. Knowing," she gulped, "that there's a chance the cancer will be back and then I'll never have reached that five year milestone."

"Keep your chin up," Meredith smiled weakly. "I'm sure everything will be fine. It has to be, right? You're not having hallucinations or anything again, are you?"

Izzie shook her head; her blonde ponytail bounced. "No. I feel fine. I mean, I'd feel better if Alex weren't threatening to sue—I just, it's just, last time I had Alex, and you, and such a huge support system. I can't imagine going through all that again alone."

"Izzie," Meredith said softly. "I'm here for you. If the cancer is back, I'll be with you every step of the way. I'm not going anywhere."

"Really, Mer? It's just I thought you'd take Alex's side. I mean, he's your friend too, and obviously you've worked with him these past five years."

Meredith scoffed. "What is all this _taking sides _crap? First Amelia and now you." Meredith then chuckled. "I'm not on anyone's side. You're my friend. Alex is my friend. You've both made stupid mistakes over the years, but that doesn't change the fact you're my friends. That's what friends are for, right?"

"You're not mad at me for not keeping in contact when I was gone?" Izzie asked.

"A little disappointed, but you had your reasons. I figured you wanted a new start and didn't want to be reminded of your own life. You do have a lot of painful memories here, which is why I was surprised to see you back."

"I was really nervous about applying for the job," Izzie confessed. She swallowed. "But it was time to come back. It was time for Alex to find out about his son. He's right, you know, I should have told him a long time ago. Maybe things would be different now." Izzie's eyes dreamily gazed off. "Maybe we'd still be be married and raising Blake together as husband and wife. Then Blake would never have had to wonder where his daddy was—"

The bathroom door swung open, and Izzie's face instantly froze as tall, brunette resident walked through the door. Jo Wilson's jaw dropped when she saw Meredith and Izzie.

* * *

**A/N: So I'm supposed to be getting ready to leave, but I just can't stop writing! Thank you all so much for the feedback, it really helps! So…I've not yet decided if Izzie's cancer should return. I feel like it's a bit cliché, but at the same time, it could certainly make for interesting drama. I've had Amelia's and MerDer's story plotted in its entirety since before I even started writing this story, because it is and always will be the main element of this story. Alex's story is definitely a sub-story, although there's an overarching theme I'm trying to create. **

**Well, next time I update I'll either be in D.C. or back home! **


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Hey y'all, it's my last night in D.C., and it's the first night I've had high speed internet (I've basically been using my smartphone all week since our other hotel's internet was dreadfully slow), so I thought I'd post an update! **

**Disclaimer: I am not a doctor or in the medical field, so I'm sorry if the medical details aren't 100% accurate in this chapter. I just needed an interesting case. Besides, I doubt the cases on Grey's are always 100% accurate.**

* * *

Jo gave Izzie a deathly stare as she stopped dead in her steps. Her fists clenched together, and an awkward silent rang in the bathroom as Meredith stood between Alex's ex-wife and his current girlfriend.

Finally, Izzie took a deep breath and stood up straight.

"I should get going," she said softly, and turned to Meredith. "See you later, Mer."

Meredith frowned as she watched Izzie dash out of the bathroom, leaving Meredith alone with Jo. There was a moment of silence as Jo seemed to be studying Meredith carefully. Meredith could sense the annoyance in Jo's face, as if she thought Meredith was somehow betraying Alex by talking to Izzie. Jo crossed her arms tightly and finally she let out a sigh, "I was actually hoping to find an attending," Jo said. Meredith intently raised an eyebrow, showing Jo her attention. Jo exhaled slowly. "I have a patient, a six-year-old girl, who fell off her bike and broke her arm. I put her in a cast and did a head CT just to be on the safe side, and everything checked out. But she's been complaining of a really bad stomach ache. I can't find anything wrong with her, but…"

"Did you page peds?" Meredith asked.

Jo rolled her eyes. "Robbins isn't on call tonight, and I really don't want to bother her because… Oh, God. I'm sorry. Derek just got back, didn't he? You're not even in scrubs… wait, what _are _you doing here? Never mind. Don't answer that, it's none of my business. Um, maybe I can find Dr. Bailey or someone."

Meredith couldn't help but chuckle at the way Jo rambled when she was nervous. Meredith sensed Jo found her intimidating, which gave Meredith a sick sense of pleasure. It was fun being the attending the residents feared. Somewhere along the way she had taken Dr. Bailey's place.

"What about Alex?" Meredith suggested, noticing she hadn't mentioned him.

"H-He's, uh, not answering his pages," Jo said, and Meredith noticed the worry that plastered over Jo's face all at once. "Look, forget I asked." Jo turned around.

"Wait, Wilson," Meredith insisted. "Let me go change. I'll take a look at her, okay? The kids need Daddy time anyway." She laughed.

"Are you sure?" Jo asked carefully. "I mean, you don't have to. I'm sure I can find someone else."

"Don't worry about it," insisted Meredith. "She could have internal injuries. It's important we act quickly, especially since she's so young."

* * *

Meredith was fast to change into her scrubs. She sent Derek a quick text to let him know that she'd gotten called into a case, and that he shouldn't expect her home until late. Meredith imagined he would have plenty of time to converse with Amelia, although she suspected that he would assume that his wife had planned this case intentionally, to avoid talking to him. That wasn't the case, although she did like the idea of letting the situation settle down a bit before talking to him about it. This way, he would have time alone with Amelia, and they could talk about it together - as brother and sister.

She read over the little girl's chart that Jo had sent her. Jenni Miller, age six, admitted to the hospital after falling off her bike and breaking her wrist. Meredith scrolled through the patient's file, and noticed that there were no prior medical records before Jenni had been admitted to Grey Sloan Memorial. As she entered the little girl's room, she found a small, fair-skinned little girl with bright green eyes and short brunette hair lying in the bed in a hospital gown. She held her casted arm close to her chest.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Grey," Meredith smiled kindly at the little girl. "And you must be Jenni, right?" The little girl shyly nodded. Meredith curiously looked around the room, looking for a parent or guardian. "Where's your mommy or daddy?"

"My daddy left a long time ago," the little girl said hoarsely. "My mommy went somewhere on her phone."

"Oh," Meredith said, assuming her mother had just gotten a call from work and would be back shortly. She saw Jo enter the room in corner of her eye. "Now, my friend Dr. Wilson tells me that you've been having stomach pain. Is that true?"

Jenni nodded. "My mommy says it's just nerves and I should stop being a baby."

Meredith looked at Jo, whose face was solemn. "Well, sweetheart, do you mind if I examine you so I can see if there's something I can do to help?" Jenni nodded shyly. Meredith gently pressed down on Jenni's stomach. The little girl immediately flinched.

"Does that hurt?" Jenni nodded her head. Meredith gently and slowly moved her hands lower on Jenni's stomach, noticing obvious abdominal tenderness, and Jenni started to shake. Tears welled in the little girl's eyes.

"Please stop," the little girl pleaded. "Please. I'll do anything. Please don't hurt me again."

Meredith took her hands off Jenni. "I'm not going to hurt you anymore, Jenni. Nobody's going to hurt you ever again." Meredith grabbed Jo's arm and guided her out of the room.

"It's abuse, isn't it?" Jo gaped, placing her hands on her hips. Her brown pony bounced as she shook her head.

"I think it's a little soon to be jumping to conclusions," Meredith said. "But she does have obvious abdominal tenderness, and she completely freaked out when I lowered my hand on her stomach. I don't want to jump to conclusions too early. Did you meet the mother?"

"She's a total crack head," Jo said. "She spent most of the time texting her drug dealers while I was explaining her daughter's injuries to her. She doesn't give a damn about that little girl."

"Okay, first things first, it's completely inappropriate for you to just _assume _the mother is a crack head, and it's even more inappropriate for you to assume she's texting her drug dealers," Meredith scolded, pushing her bangs behind her ear.

"I'm sorry, but I-I know a bad mother when I see one. I mean, considering I bounced from foster home to foster home as a kid, I think I know," Jo said. "And that girl has been sexually abused."

"You've done an abdominal CT?"

"I did. Everything looked normal," Jo said.

"Order a rape kit," Meredith instructed as she scrolled through the patient's file and brought up the CT, just to make sure Jo hadn't missed anything.

"Excuse me?" a slender, dark-haired woman appeared behind Jo and Meredith. Her skin was nearly as pale as a ghost's, and she had engorged dark circles underneath her eyelids. Meredith didn't have to ask if she was Jenni's mom, and she now fully understood Jo's reasoning in diagnosing her as a crackhead. "You're the doctors, right? You've looked at my little girl, and is she okay? Can I take her home now? I told her she needs to stop being such a baby. I broke every bone in my body when I was growing up, and you didn't see me crying to the doctors about it. I toughened it out. I'm sorry my daughter is such a baby."

"Mrs. Miller, your daughter is really hurt," Dr. Wilson said bitterly. "She's in pain, so you need to stop putting the blame on her." Fire shot through Jo's eyes at Mrs. Miller.

Meredith was studying Jenni's CT as Jo bantered with the girl's mother. To the naked eye, everything looked normal, but it wasn't until Meredith zoomed in closer on her iPad that she noticed the abnormalities. The internal injuries Meredith was witnessing most certainly weren't new. _What the Hell has happened to this girl? _

"It's _Miss _Miller," the woman corrected, seemingly ignoring everything Jo had just said.

_Shit. _

Just then, the monitor in Jenni's room began to beat erratically. She was arresting. Meredith and Jo dashed into the room at the same time. Jenni's skin was turning blue. Meredith began CPR. "Push .35 of EPI!" she instructed Jo, and Jo followed orders. A nurse entered the room. "Page Yang! We need to open her up now!"

"Is my baby girl okay?" the girl's mother wandered aimlessly into the room. "Is she okay? Jenni?"

"GET HER OUT OF HERE NOW!" Meredith hollered, and the nurse grabbed the mother. "PAGE YANG AND BOOK US AN OR!"

Cristina met Jo and Meredith in the scrub room of OR 3.

"What's going on?" Cristina demanded.

"Six-year-old girl, she's bleeding in her abdomen and keeps arresting. A cardiac CT wasn't done because she was experience abdominal pain, but as I looked closer on the abdominal CT, I noticed small amounts of blood leaking into her stomach. I bet you anything she has Cyanotic Heart Disease, which is often caused by parents doing street drugs during pregnancy…"

"Wouldn't she have been diagnosed as an infant?" Cristina asked.

"Usually, but without proper medical care, then no," Meredith responded. "We've got to act simultaneously if we want to save this girl's life. Wilson, hand me a scalpel."

Meredith's heart pounded faster than it had in months. It'd been so long since she'd been in on an emergent surgery after five o'clock at night. The surgery went flawlessly, and Meredith was able to stop the bleeding, and Cristina was able to repair Jenni's heart, although there was a chance she would need future medical care. Truly, it was a miracle that Jenni had survived all this. If they had waited any longer, she wouldn't have made it.

"Do you still want me to order a rape kit?" Jo asked Meredith quietly after the surgery was over, and she, Jo, and Cristina were standing outside Jenni's bedroom waiting for her to wake up. The mother had disappeared again. What kind of mother did that? Disappeared when their child was in surgery?

Meredith nodded. "Go ahead."

Jo walked off, and Cristina's eyes widened at Meredith. "So you think abuse is involved?"

Meredith frowned and nodded. "You should have seen the way she freaked out when I examined her lower abdomen."

"That's awful," Cristina said.

"Look, Cristina, about earlier…"

"Huh?" Cristina asked.

"You were just making a joke, weren't you? And I thought you were bringing up something else. You're right, I took it personally."

"Eh, it's what you do. I should be used to it by now," Cristina laughed, adding, "some things never do change."

"I _do not _take everything personally!" Meredith protested.

"Yeah, you do," Cristina laughed.

Meredith rolled her eyes and looked into Jenni's room. "Poor girl," she sighed. "Someone should be there with her when she wakes up."

"I nominate you! You're the Mama Bear," Cristina nudged Meredith, who looked at the clock and saw it was ten o'clock. She thought of her own babies, who Derek was probably singing or reading to sleep right now. She wouldn't be there to hug them goodnight tonight. Her heart sank as she looked at Jenni, whose mother hadn't cared to stick around to see if she had survived an important surgery. She could have _died_, and her mother wouldn't have cared. Meredith couldn't imagine. If it were one of her own kids, she would want to be there holding their hand the entire time. The idea of Bailey or Zola being inside an O.R. again was horrifying. After all, Derek had already operated on Zola, before she was their daughter. The thought of something happening to her again was horrifying, especially knowing Derek _couldn't _operate on her because the hospital had a "no operating on immediate family members" policy. Meredith didn't trust her children's brains in anyone other than her husband's hands.

Meredith noticed Jenni stirring, and she slowly went into the little girl's room. The little girl's eyes wearily opened.

"Hi, Jenni. Do you remember me?"

"Dr. Grey?" Jenni coughed.

"That's right, I'm Dr. Grey," Meredith smiled gently. "How are you feeling?"

"Thirsty," Jenni said. "Is my mom here?"

Meredith sighed. "She went downstairs to grab a bite to eat," Meredith lied. "She'll be back soon."

Jenni frowned and shook her head. "You don't have to lie," Jenni told Meredith, looking out the hospital window. "It's dark outside. My mom had to go meet up with her friends. That's where she goes when it's dark outside."

"Does your mom leave you home alone a lot?" Meredith asked.

"Every night," Jenni said. "But my mom told me not to tell anyone that...so it has to be our secret, okay? She said the police would take me away if they found out I was home alone. Do you have kids?"

Meredith nodded. "I have two children. A little girl and a little boy."

"Are they home alone right now?" Jenni asked.

Meredith shook her head. "No, they're not. Their daddy is with them."

"Oh," a tear formed in Jenni's right eye. "They're lucky to have a daddy. I wish I had one."

Jo appeared at the door with a nurse. Meredith locked eyes with Jo.

"Hi, Jenni, remember me? Dr. Wilson. Well, this is my friend, Nurse Kellie. Nurse Kellie is going to check you out to make sure you're okay," Jo smiled. "If you need us, Dr. Grey and I will be right outside the door."

Jenni nodded, and Meredith followed Jo out of the room. Cristina had already disappeared. Meredith's heart ached for Jenni. Jo's eye welled with tears as she stared at her phone.

"Some people shouldn't have children," Jo said bitterly. "If you can't take care of them, then you should abort them."

"It's not your place to judge," Meredith said. "My heart goes out to Jenni, it really does. I was that child who was abandoned by my mother, who was left home alone at night. My mother wasn't a drug addict, and I wasn't abused, but I can relate. My father wasn't around after age five, so I was on my own. You don't know Jenni's mom's story. Maybe she met a great guy, maybe she was in love and wanted to have his babies, and then she got pregnant and had Jenni, and her husband got a new job and found a younger, prettier wife and left her, and she didn't know how else to cope."

Meredith found herself rambling, then suddenly realized she was talking about herself. She thought of Derek. He was doing the best he could. His new job had taken a toll on their relationship, but he still called her every day when he was away and FaceTime was a lifesaver. It was hard on the both of them, and Meredith couldn't imagine ever turning to drugs. She couldn't do that to her kids.

Everyone had their own coping mechanisms. For drug addicts and people who had a history with drugs, it was drugs. Meredith's coping mechanism had always been alcohol. Maybe people learned how to cope from their parents. After all, her father had been an alcoholic. There were times Meredith could easily see herself turning into an alcoholic if her life fell apart. Though she'd seen what alcohol had done her to her father's liver. She couldn't imagine going through that. Though, she did know, her husband and son were both matches. She would never ask either of them to donate part of their liver to her. The weeks after she'd donated her father her liver had been absolute Hell as she'd been laid up in bed, and she wouldn't want either to go through that. She'd rather they just let her die, if she was ever so depressed that she allowed alcohol to destroy her liver.

The bottom line was: they didn't know what had happened to Jenni. They didn't know if she'd been abused, or how she'd been abused. Though, Meredith did know one thing, they had to call social services. No six-year-old should be spending her nights alone while her mother was out partying.

Meredith thought back to her own childhood. She had spent nights alone at the tender age of six. What if someone had called social services on her mother? It could have happened. Maybe it should have happened.

"We have to call social services, don't we?" Jo asked. Meredith nodded. "Damn-it."

"You sound pretty disappointed. I thought you'd already deemed Miss Miller as a terrible parent?"

Jo nodded. "I did. But as a child who was raised in social services, I'm not sure it's a better place for her. My mom dropped me at a train station when I was a baby. I was bounced from foster care home to foster care home. And that's why I'm pro-abortion and against adoption."

"You wish your mother had aborted you?" Meredith raised an eyebrow, suddenly realizing she had more in common with Jo Wilson than she'd initially thought. Admittedly, the thought had crossed her mind far too many times when she was growing up. In fact, it continued to cross her mind throughout her intern year. Now, though, it was hard to imagine she'd even had those thoughts. She looked at Zola and Bailey, and she was grateful that her mother had given her the life she had.

"Sometimes," Jo whispered, a tear running down her cheek.

Meredith reached out her arm and placed it on Jo's back. "Don't," she said. "Your mother, even if she didn't raise you, gave you one gift. The gift of life."

"I just wish…" Jo sobbed. "...that life wasn't so hard. It's like one bad thing after another keeps happening to me. I can't just be happy."

"That's life," Meredith said. "Reality: it's so much more interesting than living happily ever after."

Jo shook her head. "Alex won't return my texts or calls. I think he's breaking up with me. That's what he does when he breaks up with someone, right? He avoids them."

"He probably just needs some space right now," Meredith said. "Give him a couple days, he'll come around. Like you said earlier, he has a lot on his mind right now."

"I-I j-just…" Jo stammered. "Can't help but wonder if he's going to leave me for _her_. He was married to her, right? So obviously he loved her once. Do you think he'll go back to her?"

"Jo," Meredith said softly, "Alex loves _you. _Now, I can't speak for Alex, because I can only get so far inside his head, but I can tell you this: there's a lot of history with Izzie, a lot of pain. He was broken for years after she left, and until he met you...I didn't think he'd ever be happy again. You've gotten him through a lot these past few months, with his dad. You understand him in ways she can't, because she never met either of his parents. Don't give up on him, Jo."

Jo nodded. "Thanks, Dr. Grey."

"Meredith," Meredith corrected. "You've been dating one of my closest friends for long enough. It's about time you start calling me by my first name."

Jo nodded and chuckled lightly. "Okay, Meredith." She shook her head. "I can't believe I used to think you were scary."

"Tell any of the other residents that I'm not scary or call me Meredith in front of them, and you might regret saying that," Meredith said sternly, then laughed afterward. Her smile curved downward as she looked toward Jenni's room. "I really hate to leave her, but I should get home to my husband." She glanced at the clock, it was almost eleven. Derek was really going to think she was avoiding him.

"It's all right. I've got it covered. I'll stay with her tonight," Jo said, then added bitterly, "It's not like I have anywhere else to sleep tonight. If Alex wants space, then I'll give it to him."

Meredith headed off, ready to go home to her husband.

* * *

**I know there wasn't any MerDer in this chapter, because I wanted to highlight the JoMer intern/attending relationship—my favorite intern/attending relationship now that Heather is dead. However, the next chapter will be entirely MerDer. **


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: You've been asking for MerDer, and I've been building up to this chapter, so thank you all for sticking with me for 19 chapters—and I hope this chapter was worth the wait. It's only the beginning of some very meaty MerDer chapters to come.**

* * *

Meredith was in the hospital lobby about to call for a cab. It was the first time she had looked at her phone in hours. She had four missed texts from Derek, the first being about four hours ago and the last being about forty-five minutes ago.

_Derek: We need to talk. _

_Derek: I hope you know what Amelia said isn't true_

_Derek: I love you_

_Derek: Is everything okay? I'm starting to get worried about you. _

It was late, and she imagined Derek had to be asleep by now, so she resisted texting him back. She could talk to him when she was back at the house. She didn't want to wake him now. After all, he'd just gotten back from a six hour plane ride. His body had to be feeling the jet lag, since he'd just gone _back _three hours. It was past two in the morning in D.C. now, and he'd been up that late talking to her last night. She wasn't about to bother him now.

She had the Seattle Cab Company programmed in her phone for emergencies. She'd just opened her contacts when she heard his voice.

"Meredith!"

Meredith's fingers froze as she lowered her arm, with her phone still in her hand.

"What are you doing here?" she gasped as she saw Derek walk through the door. Meredith's first observation was that he had shaved his face. He also had changed into black sweats, and he was wearing his long, gray wool jacket. The dark circles stood out from under his weak, dim blue eyes. She could tell he was exhausted. "Shouldn't you be in bed?" Meredith gasped.

"I couldn't sleep," Derek said, walking closer to her. "Four nights without you by my side are too many. And you weren't answering my texts or calls. I was worried you were avoiding me and had gone off to Cristina's or Izzie's to avoid me, so I called Cristina and she told me that you'd caught a case here. I wanted to catch you before you caught a cab or actually did run off with Cristina or Izzie."

Meredith exhaled. "I wasn't avoiding you, Derek. Seriously, I literally just looked at my phone for the first time in hours." She sighed and he extended his arm and wrapped his arm around her waist. "Really, Derek, you shouldn't have come… you look exhausted."

"And so do you," Derek pointed out.

"What about the kids?" Meredith asked worriedly. Her eyes widened and her heart pounded ferociously in her chest as she remembered the conversation she'd just had with little Jenni.

"Both are sound asleep. Amy's there with them," Derek told her, giving Meredith a quick kiss on the cheek.

"You trust her alone with our kids?" Meredith gasped, wondering what her husband and his sister had talked about while she was away. Had they come to some consensus? She hoped they hadn't argued in front of the kids.

Derek nodded. "She's really good with them, you know?"

"Did Zola show you her booboo?" Meredith asked, widening her eyes, having not forgotten the incident in the kitchen that morning.

"She did. It was an accident. It could have happened with either of us," Derek insisted.

"Well, Dr. Shepherd, look at who's made a complete one-eighty. Earlier you looked like you were about to shred your sister into pieces. Now you're defending her. I'm going to guess that you had a nice chat?" Meredith asked with observation.

"We did talk…a lot," Derek admitted. "Let's go, and we can talk about it in the car."

Meredith's stomach rumbled as she walked beside Derek as they left the hospital. She hadn't eaten since lunch, and she was starving. Unfortunately, she knew she was going to have a hard time finding something to eat at this hour. McDonalds would be open, but their menu was so limited after eleven o'clock at night. The notion of a greasy cheeseburger didn't sound so bad right now, though. She knew Derek would give her crap about it.

"So, what'd you and Amelia eat for dinner, since the kids got to have pizza?" Meredith asked after they'd gotten in the car, her in the passenger seat and Derek in the driver's seat.

"Oh, we went to The Crab Pot before picking up the kids. I know you're not a huge fan of seafood, so I figured you wouldn't mind that we'd gone without you." He laughed, and then leaned in and softly kissed her cheek. His warm lips on her cheeks caused a shiver to shoot down her spine almost instantly.

Meredith squinted. "Um, gross. Yeah, thanks for going without me."

"What'd you eat?" Derek asked.

"Uh…" Meredith mumbled.

"Meredith!" Derek scolded. "You haven't eaten, have you?"

Meredith shook her head. "I didn't have time. Izzie was in the bathroom…"

"Amy told me…"

"Then Jo walked in…" Derek's eyes opened wide. "Yeah, awkward, anyway, Jo pulled me in on a case of a six-year-old girl, and if we hadn't been able to operate right away, she wouldn't have survived." Meredith exhaled angrily. "Not that the girl's mother cared. Derek, the mother _left _the hospital after her daughter went into surgery. The little girl told me that her mother leaves her at home all the time alone. Jo's convinced drug activity is involved, and I have to admit that's what it looked like to me too. We also suspected sexual abuse."

"Oh, Mer, that's horrible. Poor girl. Did you call social services?" asked Derek, inserting the keys in the ignition. The engine vibrated as the car started, and Derek backed out of the parking spot.

Meredith inhaled deeply, remembering her conversation with Jo. "I'll do it tomorrow if Jo doesn't. She's safe tonight, at least. Jo is staying with her."

"That's nice of her," Derek said. "Well, I guess we'd better get you some food before we go home."

"Really, it's all right," Meredith said, hoping Derek couldn't hear the gurgling of her stomach acid. "I don't need to eat. I'll eat a big breakfast tomorrow. I'm sure your sister will try to make us a big kiss-ass breakfast tomorrow. She's made breakfast the past two days. Besides, the only place that's open at this hour is McDonalds, and I know how you feel about the smell of McDonalds's food."

Meredith intently observed the expression on Derek's face as he cocked his head slightly like he did when he was contemplating. "I don't know how you can eat that crap without barfing," Derek laughed. "But we could stop at a convenience store. They might still have hot dogs on the rollers."

"At…" Meredith looked at the clock on the car's dashboard "...quarter to midnight? I doubt it, Derek. Just forget. Let's go home, you're exhausted."

"I'm fine, Meredith," Derek insisted harshly, and Meredith watched as he pulled into the building with the tall yellow "M" sign. "Besides, you don't want to spend more time with me? We hardly ever get any time to ourselves. Let's take advantage of my sister being in town."

"It's not that… what are you _doing_, Derek?" She watched as he pulled up to the drive-thru window.

"I'm ordering you a double cheeseburger, fries, and a Coke," Derek smiled widely. "That okay with you?"

Her heart skipped a beat because he'd memorized her regular order when she did go to McDonalds. "It's fine with me, but I don't want to hear you complain about how the smell of McDonalds makes you gag." She flirtatiously nudged Derek's shoulder, and his lips cracked a smile.

"I promise," Derek chuckled warmly, and turned toward her and ran his fingers through her long, messy honey-colored hair. He kissed her forehead. "I won't say a word." Their gazes met for a moment.

"I love you," Meredith whispered softly.

"You better," teased Derek.

She wrinkled her nose. "Well, otherwise you were gonna have to listen to my stomach rumble all night. You're doing yourself a favor." She laughed, though she knew McDonalds wasn't the most filling food. She was about to consume about 2,000 empty calories, but she didn't care at this point.

Meredith devoured her food as Derek began driving in the direction of their house in the woods.

"So, did you convince your sister to keep her baby?" Meredith finally worked up the courage to ask. "I mean, considering you seem pretty content with her being here now. I'm guessing something good came out of your alone time earlier."

Derek sighed. "I did not."

"What?" Meredith almost spilled her soda.

"I think I have an idea of _why _she doesn't want to tell the boyfriend, though," Derek admitted.

"Oh, really? Amelia made it seem like they were together. She talked about what great guy he is, which is why I can't really figure out why he'd be okay with her taking a position so many hours away from him. What you said earlier made me think about that…"

"Apparently she told him that she was just coming here for a couple days to help me while I was away. She told him today that she was asked to stay, and I guess he freaked out."

"Well, no shit," Meredith rolled her eyes. "Can you blame him? Imagine if you'd told me you were going on a business trip then called me from D.C. to tell me you'd been offered a job there. I would have jumped on the first plane to D.C. and killed you with my bare fists. By the way, thank you for telling me right away...and in person." She'd been pissed and disappointed at the time, but it could have been a hell of a lot worse. She couldn't imagine Derek telling her over the phone, more less thousands of miles away.

"You're welcome," Derek laughed. "But it's a little different. I mean, you're my wife, and we have two kids...I couldn't imagine telling you any other way than face to face."

"But she's pregnant with _his _baby. Doesn't he have the right to know?"

"You see, that's just it," Derek began, "I'm not entirely convinced it's his baby. Amy does have a history of sleeping around. She's even cheated on her past boyfriends. It would explain why she skipped town and didn't tell her boyfriend."

Meredith's jaw dropped. "I never thought of that...you're right, it makes sense. Did she tell you she cheated on him?"

"No," Derek replied. "I tried to hint at it, but she kept changing the subject. She doesn't want to talk about the baby's father. I guess James, that was her boyfriend, told her he was going to get on a plane and come here and she told him not to. I guess she told him that she needed a break."

"So they're broken up?"

"I guess, from the way she made it sound. She made him promise not to come looking for her in Seattle. I don't know. If I were him, I'd be on the first plane out here too. Honestly? I'm surprised I haven't heard from Addie yet. I know this James guy works at St. Ambrose, so he works with Addie."

"Maybe he hasn't told her yet," Meredith suggested. "But it sounds messy. Although if James isn't the father, then I guess it makes sense as to why she wants to give the baby up. Especially if she regrets cheating on her boyfriend."

"You know, and I'd just thought Amy had started to grow up," Derek sighed. "I talked to her around New Years, and she really seemed to have her life on track. Now, she goes and does this crap."

Meredith shook her head solemnly. "Of course there's also the baby she lost. I think she's afraid to get attached to this baby. He already has a congenital heart defect. She's afraid it could turn into something more."

"Wait? What baby that she lost?"

Meredith rounded her mouth and inhaled. "Amelia didn't tell you?" Derek raised his eyebrows. "Obviously not. Well, I guess she was pregnant the last time she was here. She told me that she gave birth to a baby with Anencephaly, and she donated the baby's organs."

Derek's jaw dropped. "And she never told me."

"Apparently not."

"But she told you?" Meredith nodded slowly. "I mean, not that it changes anything. I'm just surprised that she never said anything. Surprised that Addison never said anything either. Addison must have known."

"I think Amelia asked Addison not to tell anyone in her family. It was a hard time for her, so I understand why she didn't want anyone to know," Meredith said and then confessed, "I was shocked when she told me her first night here."

"Mmm," Derek murmured as he pulled into their driveway. The house was pitched black, which indicated that Amelia was probably asleep too. Meredith had already finished her food, so she tossed her McDonalds bags into the outdoor trash can. Derek placed his arm around her, and they quietly walked into the house, hoping not to wake anyone up.

She took Derek's hand and weaved her fingers into his. The outdoor motion lights automatically turned on as they walked toward the front door together. Derek let go of her hand to insert the key into the door, and they tiptoed quietly into the dark house. They dashed into their bedroom. Meredith turned on the lights and Derek closed the door. Derek grinned as he embraced her in his arms and his ocean, piercing eyes gazed into his wife's eyes. "I think we made it without waking anyone," he whispered, leaning in and pressing his lips against hers. He wrinkled his forehead and she could tell he was trying not to say anything. He mumbled, "You taste like McDonalds."

"Hey, I said no complaining!" she hissed, and she giggled. "I'll go brush my teeth."

"I'll join you," he laughed, and they both went into the bathroom. She squirted the mint Colgate toothpaste onto her toothbrush. Derek held out his toothbrush and she squirted toothpaste on his toothbrush too, and they both brushed their teeth together. They spat at the same time, and before either had rinsed their mouths, Derek planted a kiss on her lips, leaving the residue of his toothpaste on her mouth. She laughed as she grabbed a small plastic cup and rinsed the soap from her mouth and spat into the sink. Derek did the same.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and rocked her gently, His lips pressed his lips against her neck and she released a soft moan. Then, he lifted her feet off the bathroom floor and she screamed.

"Shhh," Derek whispered softly as he carried her into the bedroom and tossed her gently on the bed and whispered in her ear, his hot breath pressed against her eardrum, "Don't forget we have company in the living room."

She giggled, feeling Derek's warm radiating body heat against hers. "I didn't."

He leaned his body over hers and lowered himself on top of her and began kissing her lips. "Mmm, you taste good...minty. I like minty. Much better than McDonalds."

"You taste good too," she replied, and their tongues intertwined, and Derek's hands ran down her stomach and slid under her shirt. She ran her fingers under his as well. His chest was so warm. They both removed their shirts and tossed them on the floor. "Shit," she groaned as Derek started to unbutton her jeans.

"What is it, Meredith?" Derek asked; her heart pounded radically as his face froze.

"I, uh," Meredith sighed, realizing she'd forgotten to take her birth control these past couple days. She was usually so diligent about taking it. During the early days of their relationship, she and Derek had used condoms and she was also on the pill. They were always extra careful, because Meredith wasn't ready for kids. Then when they'd started trying, obviously she'd gone off the pill. Then when she realized she could probably never even have a baby, birth control was the farthest thing from her mind. And then their miracle baby had come along. She and Derek had talked about having more kids one day, but they both knew they weren't ready. Meredith had considered all her birth control options after Bailey was born. They'd talked about waiting until Zola went to kindergarten. By then, Meredith would be almost forty, though, and Meredith knew that fertility rates dropped tremendously after forty. They'd had a hard enough time getting pregnant the first time. So she had decided on the pill. It was easy to go off if they changed their minds. The only downside was she had to remember to take it every single day.

"What?" She saw the concern on Derek's face.

"This is gonna sound weird, and I know we haven't used them in years, but you don't happen to have any condoms on hand, do you?" she felt horrible asking Derek. They used to have them on hand all the time at the old house. They even had a "condom jar" in the living room that was widely used by everyone in the house. Now it was just them, and Meredith certainly wasn't about to go ask Derek's sister if she had condoms on her.

"Uh, we haven't used condoms in like five years," Derek said perplexedly. "Oh…" he murmured. "You forgot to…"

She nodded. "I know, I feel horrible...I'm a bad wife." She sighed and realized she'd totally killed the mood.

"It's okay, it's okay," Derek said, leaning in and kissing her neck.

"Well, we can always pull and pray," she giggled softly in his ear, feeling slightly like a rebellious, immature teenager as she wrapped her arms around him and shifted her body on top of him. She slid her jeans off and began working on unbuttoning Derek's jeans.

"We could," Derek said, "but you were just saying how you don't want another baby right now…"

"I don't," Meredith said, "and the chances are I can't even get pregnant again. I mean, look at all we went through before."

"You know, you're gonna curse yourself," Derek laughed as Meredith slid his jeans off. He unfastened her bra while running his hands all over her back.

"Life's about taking risks, isn't it?" she asked. "Whatever happens, happens."

He slid her panties off and gently kissed her lower stomach, he worked his lips down to her pelvis and looked up at her as he gently ran his fingers over her two folds and a shiver ran down her spine. He slid one finger inside her and she let out a soft moaned.

"Are you sure?" he asked softly.

"Oh, Derek," she panted as he thrust his finger inside her. "I'm positive."

"Oh, Mer, you're so wet," he moaned as he inserted a second finger and began thrusting faster. Her body tingled and she felt the pressure building in her lower body. The tension in her body rose as Derek began moving his fingers in a circular motion.

"Derek, I need you," she panted. "Please."

He removed his fingers from her and leaned over her body, and he lay on top of her. He cupped his hands around her breasts and covered her nipple with his mouth. He ran his tongue over the tip of her nipple and she released a moan. "Shhh," he whispered. "We don't want to wake Amelia." She giggled, because Amelia had already seen enough. Meredith didn't want to begin to imagine Derek's little sister walking in on them actually doing it.

There was a reason they'd built their kids' rooms on the other side of the house, so they wouldn't have to hear Mommy and Daddy riding the carnival. The living room was right outside their bedroom, though. They hadn't anticipated on others sleeping in it, but Callie had slept there for a few weeks when she and Arizona were separated.

The house had five bedrooms and two bathrooms. Zola and Bailey each had their own rooms, there was a playroom, and Derek had his own office. Bailey's nursery was originally guest room, but that had been transformed quickly. Both rooms were big enough to house another bed, so they figured if they did have more children, the kids could share a room. Growing up, Meredith had always wished she'd had a sibling to share a room with. Derek had laughed when she'd told him that. He had shared a room with Amelia for a little while, and he had described it as an utter nightmare.

"You're sure you want to pull and pray?" Derek asked sincerely one more time, as he folded his fingers into hers.

"I'm sure," she said. "I just want you, Derek. I want to feel my husband inside me."

He kissed her stomach and then slowly inserted himself into her. She breathed heavily as she adjusted to his size. It had been a week since they'd last had sex. His slow and gentle thrusts sent her nerves into a wild frenzy. Her heart was racing as she tried to keep her moans soft, so they didn't wake Amelia. He continued to thrust with passion as he leaned over her body and kissed her softly.

"I love you," he said as they moved their hips in unison.

"I love you, too–oh, Derek!" she moaned as she felt her body tentatively approaching its climax.

"OH, God," he moaned too, "I don't know how much longer I can—" He abruptly pulled out, right before she had reached her orgasm. Her heart rate slowed, and she stuck out her lip.

"This is why I need to remember to take my birth control," she pouted as she let out an obnoxious sigh.

"I'm sorry," Derek whispered, pecking her lips with his warm, soft lips; her alert nervous system sent off fires as he inserted three fingers into her. "Let me see if I can finish you off manually."

"It's not the same," she said flatly, "but oh!" She felt her climax rising as he stroked her. "Derek, God—" She felt her body coming upon an orgasm again; Derek always knew all the right spots to hit. Her heart was racing; her breathing was rapid; and her entire body throbbed as the tension in her body released into her orgasm and Derek fell on top of her. His warm lips met hers.

"Better?"

"Much," she whispered, still catching her breath. "Thank you."

"Any time," he laughed, rolling off her and lying beside her. He stroked her hair gently.

She laid her hand on his stomach and rolled on top of him. Meredith couldn't help but feel guilty that he hadn't gotten to finish. She kissed his collarbone and then lowered her hands in between his thighs.

"What are you doing?" Derek said then released a soft moan.

"Well, it's not fair that I got to finish, and you didn't," Meredith replied seductively.

"Mer, you don't have..._oooh_." She cupped her hand around him and began moving her hand up and down, making sure to hit the sensitivity in his tip. She moved her hand faster and faster and watched as Derek's face lit up. "I'm close," he moaned. She smiled, pleased, realizing how much his pleasure turned him on, and then he grabbed her shoulders and threw her on the bed and gently began massaging her breasts as she reached for him, and continued to move her hand up and down rhythmically.

"Come for me, Derek," she breathed heavily because her arm was starting to get tired. She couldn't even remember the last time she'd done this. Derek released a loud moan as he emptied himself on Meredith's stomach and she smiled, pleased with herself. He leaned in and kissed her.

"You know, you're pretty amazing," he said. "I love you."

"Remember when we used to have sex several times a day? We'd sneak away to on-call rooms, your office, and supply closets…"

"Uh-huh," Derek laughed. "I loved those days."

"I miss them," Meredith admitted.

"Wanna go another round?" He rolled on top of her again and began kissing her neck. She could feel his erection still throbbing against her knee.

Meredith sighed and looked at the clock. Two o'clock. She couldn't even remember the last time they'd stayed up this late having sex. It was hard to believe they used to do it all the time. If they went to sleep now, if they were lucky, they might get four hours of sleep. Her eyes were heavy, and she was exhausted.

"If only I had the energy," she sighed. "We used to be able to go four, sometimes five, rounds in the middle of the night and I'd never get tired. When did we get old?"

"We're not old," Derek laughed. Their gazes met. "Okay, maybe we're getting a little old." He rolled next to her again and confessed, "I don't have the energy to go another round either."

Meredith slid off the bed and went into the bathroom to clean herself up. When she re-entered the bedroom, she opened Derek's side of the dresser and threw a pair of pajama pants at him. "Put these on. You never know who might walk in on us in a couple hours, and I'd prefer they not see us naked." She raised an eyebrow as she saw Derek slide on his pajama pants. She also slid on a pair of pajamas. Derek slid off the bed and groggily walked over to the dresser and pulled out a tight blue pajama pants. He slid on the shirt then wrapped his arms around Meredith.

He tried to lift her, but his arms let out.

"I'm weak," he gasped and pouted, "I'm an old man."

Meredith giggled, "At least you're a hot old man, and you're all mine." She wrapped her arms around her husband's waist and leaned close into his chest; she could hear his heart beating rhythmically. She turned the lights off then danced her way back to bed with her husband. Both were asleep within moments of their heads hitting their respective pillows.


	20. Chapter 20

The bright yellow sun shined through Meredith and Derek's bedroom window that morning, waking Meredith from a deep sleep. Her matted eyes opened and her pupils shrunk, slowly allowing her eyes to adjust to the bright room.

A homey scent lingered in the air, filling Meredith's nostrils. Meredith immediately recalled the scent from two days earlier, when Amelia had made French toast for breakfast.

Derek's arm was heavily draped over her back. She snuggled closer to him before lifting her head to check the time on her alarm clock.

_Seven-twenty-three. _

"Shit!" Meredith called out. Her first surgery was scheduled for nine o'clock that morning, and she was not about to lose another surgery. She immediately nudged her husband. "Derek, wake up."

"Mmm." Derek stirred in his sleep, and he rolled on top of her and rubbed his face against hers. He rubbed his face against hers and the smell of his morning breath filled her nostrils. He softly kissed her cheek with his eyes still shut tight.

"It's almost seven-thirty, Derek!" she hissed, and Derek's eyes sprung wide open. His bright blue eyes shined as the light hit them for the first time that morning.

"Can't we just stay in bed and let Amy take care of the kids today?" Derek laughed and tenderly kissed Meredith's forehead.

"I have a surgery at nine, and I already lost one surgery to Dr. Bailey yesterday. I can't let that happen again," Meredith retorted. "You have to get off me, Derek." She tried to move, but his weight confined her to the bed.

He pouted. She noticed him sniff the air. "Mmm. Breakfast. Smells like French toast."

"I told you your sister would make us a kiss-ass breakfast this morning, didn't I? Now, please get off me," Meredith pleaded. Her stomach ached, and she felt gasy-a side effect of having McDonalds so late the night before. Derek slid off her and she slammed her head against her pillow. She wanted to go back to sleep, but she knew she had no choice but to get up. She sat up, and Derek got on his knees and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"We could always have a quickie in the shower this morning," he whispered seductively into her ear.

"We don't have time for a quickie," Meredith replied.

Derek took his arms off her waist. "You were just saying how much you missed having sex on a regular basis."

"I do, but the point is I'm running late," Meredith replied. She stood up and turned toward Derek, noticing his sad puppy dog eyes. "Oh, don't give me that look. I'm gonna go check on the kids." She slid on a pair of slippers and left Derek in bed.

In the kitchen, sure enough, she found Amelia hovering over the stove. Bailey was in his highchair with a bottle and Zola was drinking out of her little cup that had her name on it. It looked like she had orange juice in her cup.

"Mama, BaBa MooMoo!" Bailey babbled in his seat, drinking out of his green bottle.

"That's right, Bailey. A cow goes MooMoo, and milk comes from cows," Amelia smiled; she was standing in front of the oven.

"Mama!" Zola chirped as Meredith entered the room. She sprang out of her chair and raced over to Meredith to wrap her arms around her mother. "Auntie Amy said nots to wake you and Daddy so I was verrrrrry quiet!"

Meredith smiled warmly and scooped her little girl into her arms. "Well, that was nice of her." Meredith looked toward Amelia, who had just opened the oven to take out what looked like a pan of French toast sticks.

"What I tried yesterday was actually a success today," Amelia said proudly with an eager smile on her face. "It sounded like you two were up late last night." Amelia winked.

_Oh, God, _Meredith thought. "Y-You heard us? We didn't want to wake you."

"I heard you guys come in," Amelia confessed. "And then I couldn't get back to sleep. You guys were kinda loud. You're lucky you didn't wake the kids. Did Derek make sure to soundproof their rooms or something?" Amelia laughed.

Meredith's face flushed and she set Zola down, who ran back to her chair and took a sip out of her cup. Derek stumbled out of the bedroom and met eyes with his wife and his sister.

"'Morning, Daddy!" Zola clapped as her father entered the room, and she slid off her chair again to welcome her father into the room. She wrapped her arms around him, and Derek kneeled down and gave Zola a kiss.

"Good morning, Princess," Derek smiled, and then he tilted his head toward Amelia. "What's for breakfast, sis?"

"French toast sticks!" Amelia announced, as she filled five plates with warm French toast sticks. The wispy smoke rose above the food, showing its warmth. Derek joined Amelia in the kitchen and sliced up one of the sticks before serving it to his son.

"Bailey, I bet you're gonna love this," Derek cooed at his son, whose eyes focused on the food presented to him.

"He had regular French toast for the first time two days ago," Meredith informed Derek.

"Did you, now?" Derek asked Bailey in a high-pitched voice. "My little guy is growing up fast." Derek eyed Meredith.

"Yes, he is," Meredith agreed, and Derek eyed her again.

"Soon he's going to be walking, and running, and before we know it, he'll be in school. We'll be empty nesters, Meredith," Derek sighed, still talking in a baby voice.

Meredith laughed. "I think _empty nesters _is a term used to refer to children moving completely out of the house and going to college. I think we've got at least seventeen more years, Derek." Meredith eyed Amelia, who quickly hid the smile on her face when she noticed Meredith was looking at her. Amelia handed Zola a plate of food. Zola quickly stuffed two French toast sticks in her mouth at once.

"Zola!" Derek cried. "You're going to choke. Only bite one at a time."

Meredith suddenly flashbacked to intern year when George, Alex, and Cristina had had a hotdog eating contest, and Cristina had put two hotdogs in her mouth at a time. "There's no contest, Zo." Meredith quickly grabbed her iPad that happened to be sitting on the counter and snapped a picture of Zola. "Your Aunt Cristina would be proud, though."

"Meredith, don't encourage our daughter to choke!" Derek scolded as he rushed over to Zola. He reached into her mouth and forced her to spit the French Toast out of her mouth. He began cutting up the pieces of French toast that remained. "Only one _little_ bite at a time, Zola."

"I sorry," Zola said quietly once the food was entirely out of her mouth. "But it yummy."

"You know what will make it even yummier?" Amelia's face lit up. "Syrup!" She held a big bottle of Maple Syrup in her hands. "Try it, Zola." Amelia walked over to Zola's plate and poured a little dab of syrup onto it.

Zola dabbed a bite of her French toast in the syrup on her place and put it in her mouth. "Mmm. Yum!"

Bailey was also devouring his French toast bites.

"At least your kids like something I make," laughed Amelia. Derek was still intently looking at Meredith. "Aren't you guys going to eat?"

Meredith grabbed a stick off one of the remaining plates and put it in her mouth without syrup. "I have to get ready," Meredith insisted hurriedly. "I have surgery in an hour, and it takes thirty minutes to get to the hospital."

Meredith began heading toward the bathroom, and Derek followed after.

"What was that?" he spat giving her an intent look. She could tell he was angry, and she wasn't sure what'd she done to warrant this anger.

"What was what?" she spat back in a raised voice and placed her hands on her hips.

"Our daughter could have choked, and you were encouraging her by telling her that her Aunt Cristina would be proud? And then you took her picture?"

"Are you implying I'm a bad mom? She looked cute, and I thought I'd show the picture to Cristina later. And Zola wasn't going to choke. You were right there. She's fine."

"No, I'm not implying you're a bad mom! Because I know you're not, and that was completely out of character for you. I just wanted an explanation."

"Well," Meredith said flatly as she opened her drawer and pulled out a pair of jeans and black polkadot shirt. "Maybe I _want _your sister to think I'm a bad mom. I mean, there _you _were going on and on about how we were going to be empty nesters, and how Bailey was growing up. Did you _see _the look on your sister's face? You want another baby, Derek. Just say it."

"Okay," Derek said slowly. He placed his hands on the top of Meredith's shoulders and gently lowered them on her arms, embracing her in his arms. "I want another baby." He wrapped her in his arms and began massaging his thumbs into her shoulder blades. "But I want another baby with _you_. Whether it be biologically or through adoption...and I know it's not going to do Amy any good if we step up and agree to adopt her child. She's my sister, and I do feel somewhat obligated to support her."

"Do you?" Meredith gasped, looking up at Derek and carefully pushing him away. "Because yesterday you were bound and determined to get her fired. Now you're actually considering we should adopt her baby? Derek, what happened to waiting two or three years? Until Bailey was out of diapers? We just got Zola potty trained before Bailey was born. Bailey will be in diapers for another year, at least. I can't have two kids in diapers, Derek. We can't. Not with you traveling all the time, and not with me still trying to have a career. It's _not _going to work. It's not working now, so how the Hell do you expect it to work with another baby?"

"What happened to _whatever happens, happens_?" Derek quoted her words from last night and Meredith's face froze.

"I had a moment of weakness," she sighed. "It was stupid and irresponsible."

"You're right," Derek said softly. "It's not working...so I"ll cut back on my traveling."

"Oh, so you're going to call the President of the United States and tell him you quit?" Meredith rolled her eyes doubtfully.

"Not exactly," Derek answered. "But what if I tell him that I can only travel once a month, and not for more than two days at a time? There's no reason I can't use my office in Seattle more often, and there's no reason more patients can't be sent here. Plus, with technology, there's a lot I can do via video conferences. I'm going to be honest with you, Meredith. I was bored out of my mind this last time, and I felt like much of what I actually did could have been done easily online. It's the 21st Century. And if the President doesn't want to comply with modern technology, then fine, I'll quit."

"You'll quit?" Meredith raised an eyebrow. "Damn, you must_ really _want another baby."

Derek laughed. "And maybe we don't adopt Amelia's baby. But we can certainly help her out. She's obviously in a rough patch right now. Maybe we can turn my office into another bedroom. She can't keep sleeping on the couch, and it seems like she plans on staying here until the baby is born."

"You'd give up your home office for Amelia?" Meredith laughed.

"She's my sister," Derek insisted. "We're tied together by blood. And you said it yourself yesterday, and I saw it firsthand last night and this morning. It is nice having her around. She's really good with Bailey and Zola, and I do have a feeling we can convince her that she'll make a good mother too. Even if it means she lives with us for a little while after the baby is born and we help her out. If I know my sister, she's going to get attached to that baby the minute she sees him and she won't want to give him up anymore. Amy just needs a little reassurance, and I do think you and I are the perfect match to give her that. After all, you didn't want kids at first, then I convinced you. I can be _very _convincing." He raised his eyebrows.

"Mmm," Meredith murmured as Derek ruffled his nose against her hair and lightly kissed her forehead. "What happened to no more strays?" she asked.

"Amelia isn't a stray. She's my sister. It's no different than when you took Lexie in when she was in need," Derek said and Meredith's face froze. She swallowed, trying not to show emotion at the mention of her late sister's name. Derek shook his head. "Meredith, I know you don't like to talk about Lexie, and it's because you're still hurting. I'm the same way about my dad...it's okay to miss your sister, Meredith."

"Stop," Meredith said harshly. "Can we not bring Lexie into this? For one, Amelia isn't Lexie. Lexie didn't have another human being occupying her womb, for one."

"I thought you were open to helping my sister." Derek lifted an eyebrow confusedly. "At least yesterday you were."

Meredith exhaled a sigh. "I am," she said, "and it's nice having her around, it's just...I thought we'd talk her into keeping the baby and then send her back to L.A.? I wasn't prepared for you to suggest she move in with us."

"You're always saying how you don't want our children to be raised by strangers," Derek pointed out. "Amelia is our kids' aunt. And it might be good for them to have her around." He shrugged his shoulders.

"I thought you thought she was a bad influence on them," Meredith said. "You wouldn't even let her see Zola the last time she was in town."

"She's human," Derek replied, shaking his head, "she's made mistakes, we all have. I can't hold it against her forever. She's my baby sister, and I'd rather her be here where I can keep a close eye on her than somewhere else, making more mistakes."

"Derek, Amelia is an adult. She's going to make her own mistakes. I know you want to protect her, but you can't. You can only do so much," Meredith said, feeling a tear roll in her eyes as she pictured a auburn-haired young woman who had died far too early in her head. A tear rolled down her cheek. "I couldn't protect Lexie, and now she's dead." She fell into Derek's arms and he gently massaged his thumb into her shoulder blade.

"I know, Meredith. I know. There's only so much we have control over in this life," Derek whispered softly in her ear and buried his face in her soft hair.

_London Calling _by The Clash blasted through the room. Derek's ringtone. Someone was calling him. Derek let go of Meredith, who was fast to wipe away her tears. Derek reached for his phone, which had been nightstand and his face frowned. "Addie."

"I'm gonna take a shower," Meredith said, then added teasingly with a weak smile, "I'd let you join, but you have important ex-wife business to tend to."

"Oh, so not fair," Derek sighed, and to Meredith's dismay, he answered his phone. "Hello, Addison."

* * *

Meredith's shower was quick and far too short lived. She first let the water beat warmly on her face, washing the dry tear stains off her face. She lathered her entire body, from head to toe, with soap, and washed her hair. The entire process took no longer than ten minutes. Stepping out of the shower, she reached for a burgundy cotton towel and wrapped it around herself. She quickly started blow drying her drenched hair. As she dried her hair with one hand, she reached for the rectangular plastic container in the medicine cabinet. She snapped open the contained and carefully counted the pills. There were fourteen pills left in the package, including the placebo week. She looked up at the light, trying to remember exactly how many days she had missed. She knew she'd missed the last two days, but she couldn't remember if she'd taken it three days ago or not. It had been a rough morning, because it'd been the first morning after Derek had left. She remembered rummaging to get Zola and Bailey both dressed and out the door. She hadn't had time to shower. She was willing to bet she'd missed the pill that day too.

So that was three, not two, days that she'd missed her pill.

Her stomach tightened as she recalled the risky activity Derek and she had partaken in the night before He'd pulled out in plenty of time, though, and he'd finished on her stomach. She really didn't think she had a reason to worry. After all, they'd had unprotected sex with him finishing inside her for years, and she hadn't gotten pregnant. She wasn't too concerned.

She took three pills to catch herself up to schedule. Just as she placed the container back in the medicine container, the door swung open. She watched as a sulking Derek entered the bathroom and reached for his toothbrush. "Wow," he smirked.

"Wow?" Meredith raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, nothing. My hot wife just happens to be wearing a towel, and I have to say, it's turning me on."

Meredith giggled. "Well, too bad I just got _out _of the shower, and I really need to get going. You missed your chance, buddy." Derek frowned, and put his arms around Meredith's towel and rubbed his hands against her soft, moist skin. "

"You're such a tease," Derek whispered in her ear. And he took his hands off her and squeezed a bit of toothpaste on his brush.

"I didn't ask you to come in while I was still naked," Meredith laughed. "Anyway, how did the ex-wife phone call go? Judging by the look on your face when you walked in here, not so great?"

"Not great is an overstatement," Derek said, and began brushing his teeth. Meredith widened her eyes, not sure if she wanted to know what he meant by that. She went back into the bedroom and took the clothes she'd laid on the bed and dressed herself. Once she was dressed, she peeked back into the bathroom and found Derek naked, about to get in the shower.

"So, I get dressed, and you get naked. I see how it is," Meredith teased.

"You're the one who emphasized on how important it was you got to work on time," Derek shrugged.

"It's not my fault that your ex-wife called _just _as I was about to hop in the shower," Meredith retorted back. "By the way, are you going to tell me what she said?"

"Do you really want to know?" Derek sulked.

"Um...by the tone in your voice, I'm guessing not?"

"Thought so. Let's just say it involved lots of yelling. She wanted to know why I didn't call her sooner about Amelia transferring permanently to Seattle. I told her it wasn't my place, and then she went on to talk about how hurt this James guy is."

"Did you tell Addison about the baby?"

"I did not," Derek shook his head. "If Amelia wants to tell her, then she will. It's not either your or my place to say anything to anyone."

"Well, I'm glad we can agree on one thing," Meredith insisted. She looked at her watch as Derek turned on the shower water. She had to leave the house within the next ten minutes to catch the next ferryboat to make it to Grey Sloan Memorial on time, otherwise she would have to wait thirty minutes and would be late for her surgery. "Uh, I have to go. Are you coming into the hospital today?"

"Yeah, I'll be in later. I think Amy's getting the kids ready now. She mentioned wanting to ride in with you. Oh, by the way, I didn't tell her that Addie called."

"Not a bad idea," Meredith noted.

"Oh, Meredith? You could have left me some warm water!" Derek hollered from the shower as Meredith was about to walk into the living room.

"That's what you get for answering ex-wife phone calls!" Meredith called back, then she snickered as she departed her bedroom.

* * *

Meredith was blissfully surprised when she saw that Amelia had managed to get Bailey and Zola fully bathed, dressed, and ready to leave all by herself.

"Wow, I'm impressed, Amelia," Meredith complimented. "Are you sure you're not already a mother?"

Amelia snickered and rolled her eyes. "No, I'm just used to babysitting triplets."

"Hm, then you've already got one up on me. I've never babysat triplets before. I couldn't even imagine." Meredith quickly grabbed her iPad off the living room table and then grabbed her purse. "Ready to go to daycare?"

"I get to see Blakey and Sofi!" Zola exclaimed eagerly.

"Yes, you do," Meredith smiled at her little girl. "Let's go. Mommy has a surgery she needs to get to."

Amelia was kind enough to drop the kids off at daycare so Meredith was able to change into her scrubs quickly. As she was in the Attendings' lounge, Cristina stoically entered and Meredith remembered the picture of Zola she'd taken that morning.

"You look in a hurry," Cristina observed as Meredith was quick to tie her hair back in a ponytail. "Got a surgery?"

"Yeah, in ten minutes," Meredith said, looking at her watch. She'd made unusually good time today on her way to the hospital. She was watching the time closely. She'd already sent a text to Robbins telling her that she was on her way, but she hadn't heard back. She pulled out her iPad. She swiped the screen to unlock it, though she was confused when the screen to enter her password didn't pop up. She didn't remember removing her password. "But you have to see what Zola did this morning. I got in trouble for taking this picture, too." Meredith laughed.

"McDreamy scolded you for taking a picture? Oh, this has to be good." Meredith took a seat next to Cristina, who leaned over Meredith's shoulder. Meredith launched her pictures, expecting to see the photo of Zola with French toast in her mouth. Instead, her heart dropped, as she looked at the photo that appeared. Her stomach tightened nauseously as she saw her purple laced bra and her fingers lowered into her silky black underwear. The tiny rectangle in the corner of the screen showed a naked Derek. It was a screenshot from two nights ago, when Derek had still been in D.C. "Crap," Meredith said as she quickly closed the app. Apparently, she'd accidentally grabbed Derek's iPad instead of her own. She was going to kill Derek.

"Hot damn, Mer," Cristina's eyes widened. "Wait, Zola took a picture of Mommy and Daddy doing naughty things? By the way, I always figured McDreamy was above average, but…"

"Cristina!" Meredith cried, closing her iPad, terribly mortified that her best friend was commenting on her husband's size. "It's supposed to be a picture of Zola with two sticks of French toast in her mouth. It reminded me of you, but _apparently _I grabbed Derek's iPad by mistake."

"Oh," Cristina's eyes widened. "I sense McDreamy is about to be McDead."

"I've got to go," Meredith said as she dashed out of the room, mortified that Derek had actually taken a screenshot of her naked. How many pictures on his iPad were there of her? She was afraid to look. She couldn't believe he'd actually done that. Then again, she deserved it. She had just showed him how to screenshot a picture. She swallowed. She knew it wasn't the end of the world. It was just a picture on his iPad, but what if he lost his iPad? What if it fell into the wrong hands? _Like the president's. _And why the Hell wasn't his iPad at least password protected? What had Derek been thinking? He was the one who'd always freaked out about sending naked pictures because someone might find his phone, and then he'd gone ahead and taken those pictures?

Meredith's feet moved swiftly as she approached the patient's room. The patient was a fourteen-year-old girl named Lena Johnson. She had a tumor in her stomach. She and Robbins had planned to operate together to remove the girl's tumor.

But when Meredith approached Lena's room, it wasn't Arizona Robbins she saw standing outside the room. It was Alex Karev.

"Alex, what are you doing here? This is Robbins's and my case." Meredith was perplexed as it appeared Alex was studying Lena's chart.

"No one told you? Robbins and Torres both called in _sick _today, so you're stuck with me." Alex's voice was harsh.

"That's awful," Meredith sighed.

"Look, I get that you don't want to work with me, but…"

"No, I mean Zola was looking forward to seeing Sofia today. If Callie and Arizona called in sick, I'd imagine they didn't bring Sofia to daycare...well, at least she still has…" She stopped, before she mentioned Blake. Alex already appeared to be tuning her out. "Alex, are you okay?"

"Just stop," Alex spat. "Don't ask if I'm okay, _okay_? I'm fine."

"You don't look fine," Meredith observed.

"Look, you of all people know what it's like not to want to be asked if you're okay, so please don't, Mer. I don't need crap from you too."

"Alex, I don't mean to pry, but who's giving you crap?" Meredith asked, wondering if he was referring to Cristina's sly comments the day before. Of course, he lived with Cristina, so perhaps she had something to him last night too.

Alex released a sigh. "Let's just prep this kid for surgery, okay? We have to work together, so let's just keep it at that. I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay, Alex. Okay," Meredith said. She knew he needed his space, and she wasn't going to force him to talk about anything he didn't want to. "But if you do want to talk about it, we have an entire procedure to talk through."

She remembered her conversation with Jo late last night. Meredith sensed that Jo hadn't yet spoken to Alex, but it wasn't any of her business. When Alex was ready to talk, he would talk. Until then, Meredith would let him have his space.

They rolled the girl into surgery, and Meredith was reminded of the last time she had worked with Alex to remove a kid's tumors. Of course, the boy's case had been so much more worse than Lena's. The tumors were larger and harder to remove. Lena's tumor was small and in a fairly easy to get to location. Meredith had been so determined to remove all the boy's tumors though. Alex had doubted her ability, and that had stung. At the time, she'd felt like Alex, too, doubted her ability as a surgeon.

"What are you doing?" Meredith asked as she looked at the angle Alex was approaching the umor. "Arizona and I planned to go from this angle." Meredith showed Alex on the monitor exactly how she and Arizona had intended to approach the tumor.

"I think it'll be easier if we go in this way," Alex protested. "Then she'll have less scarring, and we won't have to go as deep."

"But there's a risk we won't be able to get the whole tumor," Meredith insisted. "I think it's best we stick to the original plan. The thorough plan that Robbins and I devised together."

"You know what, Mer? Whatever." He dropped the scalpel on the tray. "Do whatever the Hell you want. I'm out. I'm sick of people lying to me, saying they're here for me, when they're not. You're all a bunch of liars. Jo said she'd be there for me, that she'd support me through everything, and then guess what? She didn't even come home last night. She didn't answer my calls this morning. I'm done. I'm done with liars."

"Alex…"

He stormed out of the operating room, and Meredith exhaled as she turned toward Bokhee. "Page Dr. Wilson," Meredith instructed.

* * *

**A/N: So we see a lot happen in this chapter, a lot of progress. By the way, I'm stoked to hear that Amelia is coming back to Grey's! I've wanted it for so long. Perfect timing for this story, right?**


	21. Chapter 21

Dark circles were bagged around Dr. Jo Wilson's eyes. Her hair was a mess. It was obvious she had slept only a few hours the night before, most likely sitting upright in a chair, with her chin leaning against her hand.

"What's going on, Dr. Gr-Meredith?" Jo asked Meredith, who stood above the patient. She'd taken the scalpel in her hand and was ready to cut.

"I need an extra hand, so you're scrubbing in," Meredith told Jo, whose brown eyes widened with surprise.

"Another surgery in less than twenty-four hours? I mean, yes, of course. I'll be ready right away." Jo beamed and she went into the scrub room to scrub. Meredith exhaled and smiled weakly, remembering what it was like to have your day made when an attending told her to scrub in during her residency. She knew that she was often resented by the other residents, because Derek always had her on his service and she scrubbed in all the time. It didn't ask nor expect special treatment. In fact, there were times she tried to avoid his service because she didn't want special treatments. Looking back, though, she'd enjoyed every minute of it, and sometimes, although she would never admit it, she credited Derek for helping her become the surgeon she was today. She wouldn't have gotten to scrub in on near as many procedures if it hadn't been for him. She'd watched Izzie and George struggle to get in on surgeries, and Cristina struggled after Burke left.

Jo bounced out of the scrub room. "Okay, what do you need me to do?" Jo asked. Meredith could sense the enthusiasm and eagerness to learn in the resident's eyes. Meredith began explaining the procedure to her.

"Do you want to open?" Meredith asked, and Jo's eyes widened.

"Are you sure? I mean, I don't know if I'm ready…I don't want to mess up."

"Confidence, Jo," Meredith told her. "It's the first and most crucial trait a surgeon must have. Without it, you won't succeed. You're never _going _to be ready to make that first cut. It's not something you can prepare for. You've just got to believe in yourself." Jo nodded hesitantly, and Meredith handed Jo the scalpel. "Ready to cut?"

Jo carefully cut the scalpel into the patient's skin, and Meredith didn't take her eye off Jo as she perfectly opened up the patient. Meredith proceeded to explain the procedure to Wilson.

"Wait, isn't this a peds case? Shouldn't Arizona or," Jo gulped, "Alex be here?"

Meredith exhaled. "Actually, that's why I paged you." Jo looked up, and Meredith began the procedure. "Alex walked out. He, uh, seems to think you're avoiding him. You ignored his call this morning."

"Huh?" Jo raised an eyebrow. She looked off. "Oh, shit. I think my phone was on silent then. I stayed in Jenni's room last night, and I didn't want it to go off and wake her."

"How's Jenni doing?" asked Meredith, having not forgotten about the little girl she'd stayed late to help the night before.

"She's doing as well as she can," replied Jo with a deep sigh. "I called social services this morning. As soon as she's released, she'll be going in their custody. Her mom didn't even come back tonight or this morning. I was with her when you paged. She's such a sweet kid. Actually...I see a lot of me in her. Oh, God, Alex thinks I'm ignoring him...I feel horrible now. I didn't expect him to call me at all."

"I wouldn't feel too bad. He didn't answer your calls last night, you said," Meredith said.

"Yeah, but maybe he was sleeping or his phone was off or I don't know. Like you said, he needed space, and then when he was ready to talk to me, I wasn't there. He must feel abandoned," said Jo. "I feel like such a bad girlfriend."

Meredith laughed.

"What's so funny?"

"Wilson, you're not a bad girlfriend," Meredith insisted. "I've known Alex for about eight years, and let me tell you, I think you're the best thing that's ever happened to him."

"Really?" Jo looked up with wide eyes and met eyes with Meredith for a split second.

Meredith shrugged. "I don't know if he knows it yet, but yes. Oh, there!" The tumor was in full visualization. She pointed it out to Jo, as they prepared for removal. "I need suction."

After the tumor was removed, Meredith allowed Jo to close up Lena, while monitoring her closely. "You, Alex, and Izzie were all friends, right?" Jo asked. Meredith looked up and didn't respond. "I mean, I know you were comforting Izzie in the bathroom yesterday…"

"Izzie and Alex were my roommates," Meredith declared, leaving out the detail that they'd all lived in Alex's house. It felt weird to refer to her old house, the house that had been her mother's, as _Alex's _house. "We lived and worked together, so yes, we were all very close."

"I know you said Izzie hurt Alex, and I can't even begin to wrap my mind around why she would hide his son from him for so many years, but you knew her. Is she really crazy? And do you think there's a chance Alex still loves her? I guess deep down, I keep telling myself she's a complete lunatic, so Alex wouldn't want anything to do with her. But honestly, I-I'm terrified that Alex will decide to leave me for her. She is the mother of his kid. I really don't want to lose him. Everyone else around here-all the other residents-have had their hearts broken by attendings. I-I've seen what they've gone through, and I don't know if I'm strong enough to go through that. And Alex...he's amazing. He can be a dick at times, but he's kind and sweet too. There aren't a lot of guys out there who have hearts like him, you know?" Meredith couldn't help but chuckle. "Oh Gosh, now I'm rambling and you think I'm the crazy lunatic."

"I don't think you're a crazy lunatic, Jo," Meredith insisted, gently laughing. "I was just thinking about how it wasn't too long ago I was in your position. Did you know Derek was actually married when I met him?"

"He was?" Jo's eyes widened. "I guess I've heard rumors, but who knows what you can and can't believe around here. I knew you'd met when you were an intern."

"Right. Well, I was known as the _dirty mistress_ back when I was an intern," Meredith started, "I didn't even know he was married until his wife showed up one evening as Derek and I were preparing to go out on a date, and she announced that I was the woman who'd been screwing her husband."

Jo's jaw dropped. "Oh, wow. That must have been really hard for you."

"Oh, you have no idea," Meredith said. "Let's just say that tequila became my very best friend for a while, but it all worked out in the end. Addison moved to L.A. and has her own private practice, Derek and I got married, and life is just peachy." _Peachy _was an overstatement, but Jo didn't know that. Everyone in the hospital seemed to think that she and Derek lived a perfect life with perfect house in the perfect Dream House. From an outsider's perspective, her life did look perfect. And her life was pretty great. But that's because she and Derek had learned to keep their drama out of the hospital. They'd learned how to make it work without involving all of their co-workers. Their problems were their problems. They didn't need to involve the rest of the hospital in them.

Of course, now Amelia was back in town, and who knew what drama she would stir up. Meredith didn't dislike Amelia, but she wasn't sure if she could be trusted.

"Sounds a little scandalous," Jo pointed out, referring the Meredith-Derek-Addison triangle.

"I didn't intend for any of it to happen, nor did I plan on being a husband stealer. But I wouldn't change what happened. What's supposed to happen will happen, Jo. It's all going to work out in the end," Meredith gave Jo a piece of her wisdom. She didn't know when she'd become so optimistic, and she of all people knew how it was hard to be optimistic in the situation Jo was going through. Meredith knew that if she were going through, she wasn't so confident she'd be the optimistic either.

Jo shrugged, "At least Alex isn't still married to her." Then her eyes shot open wide. "Wait, he isn't, right? You're not telling me this all because Alex is still secretly married to Izzie, right? Oh, my God…"

Meredith chuckled. "Jo, relax. I saw the papers. They're divorced."

Jo breathed a sigh of relief, and Meredith's phone beeped. She reached for her phone, surprised to see she had a page from Derek.

_9-1-1, my office _

Meredith clenched her fists together as she remembered the photos she had discovered just before she'd entered surgery. Perhaps Derek had discovered that she'd grabbed his iPad, and he was worried that she would discover the pictures.

She wondered what else could be possibly so important that he was paging her 9-1-1. She smiled to herself, briefly calling the days when Derek would page her to his old office for super-secret sex. The last time Derek had paged her 9-1-1 to his office, it had been five minutes before the daycare was about to close for the day, and it'd been his day to pick up the kids, but he was tied up and couldn't get out of the office. Needless to say, Meredith was pretty livid afterward, and they didn't have sex for two weeks after that.

Meredith turned to Jo. Lena was closed up and ready to go back to recovery. "You can bring Lena to recovery, right?" Meredith asked Jo.

Jo nodded her head. "Yeah, sure."

"Okay, page me when she wakes up," Meredith told Jo as she dashed out of the operating room.

* * *

She clenched tightly to Derek's iPad as she made an anxious dash to Derek's office. Meredith hadn't figured out how she was deal with Derek in regards to the photos she'd found on his iPad. She really wasn't mad, because she knew he wouldn't share the pictures with anyone else intentionally. She was just shocked, and the initial shock had already blew over. Her biggest concern was the fact his iPad wasn't password protected. If he was going to take pictures of her like that, he should at least have his iPad password protected.

She cracked the door open to find Derek sitting behind his desk, buried in his computer. He looked up the instant Meredith entered the room.

"You paged?" she asked, raising an eyebrow, running her hand over the iPad. He stood up and pushed his chair in.

"Close the door," Derek smirked, walking toward her. She pushed the door shut. Her heart raced as Derek moved in on her and pushed her against the door, then locked it. He gently pressed his lips against hers, and her breathing quickened as his lips moved down her neck and a moan escaped her lips.

"Oh, Dr. Shepherd, what are you doing?" Meredith asked inquisitively, still holding onto the iPad. Her teeth hovered over her lip, debating on whether to say something. He wrapped his strong arms around her waist and pulled her in close; she set his iPad down on the table by the door, then Derek ran his fingers through her hair and softly kissed her cheek. Meredith sensed that he hadn't noticed the iPads had been swapped, so she decided to keep her mouth shut and let him find out himself.

"Well," Derek laughed, "you were saying last night how you missed sneaking away for sex."

"Mmm," Meredith murmured as Derek wrapped his arms around her and lifted her off the ground. She giggled softly, feeling rejuvenated in youthfulness, as she reminisced her intern and resident years. Derek set her on his desk and began kissing her neck, working his lips down to her collarbone. She noticed his computer in the corner of her eye, careful not to lean back far enough to budge it. She noticed the webcam. "That's off, right?" she asked sternly, not having forgotten the picture on the iPad. She bit her lip, secretly enjoying Derek's ignorance.

"The webcam?" Derek asked, his dazzling blue eyes twinkled as he seductively gazed into her eyes. "Yeah, of course. Well, it doesn't work anyway. The NIH staffers haven't been able to see me through it yet. Not sure what's wrong with it. Do you think I'd be doing this if it was on?" He laughed and nuzzled his nose against hers.

"Well, gee, I don't know. Maybe you have some deal with the president to produce his live porn," Meredith said and watched as Derek raised an eyebrow, chuckling.

"Hm, live porn?" He kissed her nose. "You and I would make pretty good porn stars, huh?" He slowly removed her lab jacket and then took off his shirt. She pressed her hand against his warm, hairy chest and giggled softly.

"I suppose we would, but I'd prefer the President of the United States not to see me naked. My naked body is for your eyes only," Meredith replied adamantly, raising her eyebrows, not thrilled that Cristina had seen her almost-naked earlier. Though, she was glad it was Cristina and not someone else. Cristina and Meredith had seen each other in little clothing plenty of times. Cristina would just tease her about the circumstance, which she could handle, because Meredith knew about Cristina and Owen's sexts.

Derek's eyes rounded, and she sensed a hint of guilt in his sparkly blue eyes. His eyes always said everything. She looked around the room carefully, halfway expecting to find a hidden camera.

"There's, uh, not a bug in this room, is there?" It wouldn't surprise her if the president had a chip in Derek's room that allowed him to hear everything that was said. Big Brother was always watching, right?

"God, I hope not." Derek's eyes widened as he slid her scrub top off and sat down in his chair and she kicked off her tennis shoes. He pulled off her pants and then pulled his off, pulling her on top of him. She wrapped her legs tightly around him and felt his erection through his underwear as he lightly kissed the top of her breast as he unfastened her bra. She kissed his ear and ran her fingers through his soft dark hair. Their lips collided again as he worked off her panties, and she helped him slide his off. "One sec," Derek said as he reached for his desk drawer and Meredith saw him pull out a Trojan condom.

"You bought condoms?" Meredith laughed, her stomach fluttered. "So, this was definitely premeditated."

He smiled warmly and breathed his warm breath into her ear. "There's nothing wrong with premeditated sex." He took the condom out of the wrapper and carefully put it on, and he lifted her off the chair and carried her over to his new cushioned couch in the corner of the room. She was on top of him, kissing his chest as she inserted him into her. She moved her hips gently up and down and her heart rate spiked as she moved her hips faster and faster. Meredith loved the power she felt when she was in control. She indulged in this power she possessed, as she prepared to drive them both over the edge. The sensation wasn't as strong as it was without the glove, but tiny waves of pleasure radiated within her body. Soft moans escaped her lips, as the last thing she wanted their sex date to remain unheard by others in the hospital. Or worse, the president, if he _did _have a bug in the room. In that case, she was screwed-literally. It was too late for her to care, though.

She panted fiercely as she breathlessly approached her climax. She could see Derek's eyes shimmer as he reached his climax with her. Meredith fell off Derek and rested her head against his shoulder. She kissed his neck, "That was great, but condoms suck. No more condoms, okay?"

Derek laughed. "You'd rather get pregnant than use condoms?" Meredith didn't answer his question, because she honestly didn't know the answer. Derek exhaled, "You're the one who forgot to take your pill. You know, there are other methods, so you don't have to have to remember to take the capsule every day."

Meredith groaned; she was well aware. Sometimes Derek's knowledge of the female reproduction system could be irritating, though. He'd been married to a gynecologist for eleven years, so of course he knew a lot more than most men.

"I know," Meredith said. "Trust me, I know."

"You could get on the shot, and then you only have to get it every three months," Derek suggested.

"There are so many side effects of the shot, though," Meredith rejected. "Depression, weight gain, hair loss, nausea, oh _and _lowered sex drive. I don't think you'd appreciate that. So you'd have a depressed bald puking fat wife who never wanted to have sex with you."

Derek's eyes widened and then he laughed. He kissed her neck lightly. "I don't think it's possible for you to get fat, Meredith, and if you did, you'd still be beautiful."

Meredith sighed. "Don't flatter me. Besides, I've heard of women who were on the shot and couldn't get pregnant again after going off it. I don't want another baby now, but in another two years...once Bailey's potty trained and in preschool, and Zola's in kindergarten, I might. Did you talk to your president's people about cutting back on your travel."

"I did," he said, "and they said they'd try to cut back on my needed travel hours." He leaned in and gave her a peck on the lips. "And that does sound like a good time to try again," he said.

"We had such a hard time getting pregnant the first time. I don't want to do anything to decrease my fertility, since the chances of us ever having another baby are so slim as it is." She exhaled. "And good. They must _really _want you, since they've been so quick to negotiate with you."

"Yeah, I guess," Derek shrugged like it was no big deal, "And you're just saying that you want to keep the option open...for more babies," Derek said carefully. "It's understandable, and if we don't have another baby, that's fine too. We can always adopt, too. There are lots of babies in the world who don't have parents."

Meredith nodded just as she heard her phone buzzing from her pant's pocket, which was all the way over by Derek's desk. She groaned and leaned into kiss him again. "We definitely have too much going on now to even be having this conversation."

"There's nothing wrong with having this conversation," laughed Derek. "It's good to have a plan."

"You and I both know that plans never turn out the way we plan them," Meredith said as she covered herself as she walked in front of Derek's computer, just in case the webcam actually was on, and she bent over to grab her phone out of her pocket. She had a text from Owen.

_9-1-1 - incoming trauma - school bus hit cab - ALL HANDS ON DECK_

"Crap," Meredith said out loud.

"What's wrong, Meredith?" Derek said as he walked behind her and placed his soft, warm hand on her shoulder.

"Hunt just paged me. We have an incoming trauma. I guess a bus hit a cab. Hunt says all hands on deck," Meredith said as she quickly dressed herself in her navy blue scrubs.

"Hm, he didn't page me," Derek observed, looking at his phone.

"Probably thinks you're busy doing important presidently duties," Meredith noted jokingly. Derek shrugged. Meredith added, "Though, I'm sure he can use you. You should come with me."

"Well, I guess it couldn't hurt to get out of this office for a little bit," Derek said as he put on his scrubs. The couple made a dash for the Emergency Room together.

* * *

**A/N: I just thought I'd warn you that updates will probably be slower after this chapter. I have the next two chapters written, but work has been pretty hectic lately, and considering a vast majority of this story has been written while I was at work, that's slowing me down tremendously. I now only have nights and weekends to write, and my peak creativity hours are in the morning! I'll just hint this: A Shondaland character was affected by the accident mentioned in this chapter. The question is…who?**


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